Darn you, Melanie.
Darn you and your impressive skill..
You have no idea how excited I was to see that this was updated. I literally jumped up and down in my room and proceeded to knock over my can of Pepsi. Thankfully, nothing spilled on my computer otherwise I would have been very very upset.
Anyway, moving on.
I loved the introduction, with its undertone of sardonic humor. His observations seemed to - to me, anyway - parallel how he was feeling about his life. If he looked hard enough, the minor cracks that everyone else saw became huge, gaping holes to him. I loved it. Really, I did. But not nearly as much as I loved the paragraph describing Fred and James' relationship. It was just...well, to put it simply, it was perfect. Even though we've seen them interact in the Morning Waffle, that one paragraph had a more in-depth feel of their actual friendship than anything I've read in TMW. I don't mean that negatively because you know how much I love TMW, but I just thought I would put it out there.
Personally, I think that James has every right not to get the autograph signed for the kid. Not that it's the kid's fault, but maybe if Hoskins wasn't such a jerk, he wouldn't have ruined it for the little boy. Also, I loved the snide comment that James made to Hoskins. I wanted to give him a massive high five, lol.
Last but certainly not least, I LOVED FRED. And I demand more of him from here on out. Their interaction at the pub was simply marvellous. The stuff of legend! I especially liked the end where they were insulting one another and whopping/punching each other like manly men, lol.
All in all, it was a great chapter! I'm so glad you updated and I can't wait to see more!
Author's Response: Haha...omg, I can't believe I almost killed your computer with this chapter! :-P
Oh, I love your reading of the introduction, about the parallels to his life and everything! I don't think I wrote it that way consciously, but I definitely see it that way, too.
And I totally know what you mean about getting a better feel for Fred and James' friendship - I didn't take it negatively at all, because that's exactly what I meant to do. I figured you already got a feel for their relationship in TMW, but I wanted to put it in a different context here, so you could see them in the bad times as well as good. As I thought about this story over the past couple of months, I figured it would be a good way to set up some TMW character stuff, and so this chapter was very important to me.
Even I am not sure how James is going to decide ultimately...hmm...that probably says something about my poor story-planning. :-P
I realized there is definitely a lot of punching and throwing things in my writing. Hmm. Violent much? But they are guys, and...well, you know how guys are. Need I really explain?
Thanks for the review, Molly! I'm really sorry it took me so long to respond!