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Review:DeaVanity says:
Hi, reviewing as requested. :)

You asked about Harry's character...

"Thanks. You really didn't have to do that for me. I've never shown you any kindness and yet your taking care of me. Thank you, I don't know how to repay you," – this doesn't sound like something Harry would say. I mean, it does sound like something he would say but not in those words... hm, I can't think of how to rephrase that...

Uhh, and the ending was a bit rushed... I mean, Harry at first thinks how much he loves Ginny and all that and then says how much love Parvati has shown him and kisses her. I don't know, it's a good plot and all that, but you can touch it up a bit ;D .

Oh and I think it's Parvati, not Parvarti (though maybe it's differently spelled in different editions of the books).

Anyways, I think you have a good story and an original plot but there are some things that can be improved. :) 8/10.

Thanks for requesting x)

~ DeaVanity

Author's Response: I will have to look at the spelling. I just wrote it as I say it. Maybe I should of checked HP-Lexicon! Oops. I will definitely look at that dialogue and see what I can do to fix it up. Thanks for reviewing!

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