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Review:timeturner says:
I thoroughly enjoyed this. Your description at the beginning sat the tone and mood of the story wonderfully and it flowed into the "action" part of the scene quite well. I think the dialogue was extremely well done...minimalistic, yes, but that is exactly what was called for in a situation like the one you've painted here.

The only thing I could suggest (and it is the tiniest thing) is the character's name. Choosing Daniel was interesting but kept me from the main attention of the story. It may only be a staff thing (checking for real characters and such) but I found it quite distracting to have the Daniel Radcliffe/Harry mix in there.

As I said, I think you've written a wonderful piece here. Evocative, moody and yet setting a tone of hope not only for the "boy" but for a man who had been resigned to his normal quiet life and yet helped save the world in his own little way.

Author's Response: Oh, wow. Thanks so much for your kind words! I'm really glad to hear that you think the dialogue worked in this story - I agree that too much dialogue would have distracted from the story's flow - and I may have partially planned it that way. :P

I'm blown away that the only criticism you could find was Daniel's name. You have a good point - to be honest, I picked it without thinking when I first wrote this.When I picked up on the possible double meaning he was already Daniel to me, and I decided not to change it. I had actually forgotten all about the Dan Radcliffe connection until you pointed it out! I hope others aren't as thrown by his name though; it's something I will have to give some thought to.

Once again, thanks so much for the review timeturner! I really appreciate your input!


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