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Review:harrylilyjames says:
There are a few typos, just extra small words slotted into some sentences. If you read over it, you will catch them.

"the smell of tea and honey, the feel of her hair in his finger"- there should be an 'and' in the middle where the comma is.

"Night had now completely fallen over the water."- the sentence before you're talking about her kissing him and then you change back to the time of day it is. Might want to make a smoother transaction between the two, something like 'She moved away from him and Neville could see the tears on her cheeks which twinkle in the moon which was now fully risen," do you understand what I'm trying to say? Sorry, if it's confusing.

In some parts you repeat their names a bit too often, once we know who they are, you can say 'he' or 'she', like when your saying that she crawls into bed smelling of tea and honey, you can she 'she' instead of 'Hannah' because you already told us it's Hannah in that paragraph.

BUT WOW!!! I was totally not expecting that ending, what a shocker!! Awe, Neville as a dad, that is soo cute!


Author's Response: Aw. Thank you very much for your review. It really is helpful to read some constructive criticism in a review. Proof-reading is probably my weakest point in my writing. :( but I'll surely look over it. I always doubt whether I can switch names out with pronouns, but your explanation actually really makes sense.

I know I know... I always wanted Neville to have a little tyke. :) So I figured why not.

Thank you for your review.

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