Once again, a brilliant chapter :) Thanks for PM'ing me it's existance! haha ;) Alright, onto yet another boring commentary:
The only thing that I caught grammatically was this:
“Scorpius, I know where Nate is hiding!” Rose said as she reached the bathroom.
“Where he’s hiding?” Scorpius asked.
“Yes, I think I know. (blah, blah...ect)
The sequence didn't make much sense, but that was it. :) As far as everything else goes, I love your portrayal of Hugo. This part made me really sad: “Dad threw his breakfast at her, and she picked up the pieces of the broken plate with her hands..."
Poor Molly and Arthur. I feel so bad for them, I really do. You make the readers sympathise. I have never known anyone with Altzheimers, and now yet, I feel as if I do. It's a brilliant twist, It really is.
As far as Scorpious and Rose go, I like their interactions. They seem like a young couple in love. Yet, only two things seemed odd to me, and both have to do with clothes: Scorpious throwing his clothes on the floor. Ok, wait. It might not bother me. He's a Malfoy, and he had houseelves. Scratch that. But the choice of clothing was odd. And Rose wanting to 'dress up' to see Nate. He was hiding, and she was accused of 'murdering' him. I don't think she would care about her clothes, and when Rose told Scorpious that she knew where he was, I would think that Scorpious might 'stick his head out of the shower' and be like "What?". There seemed to be an odd lack of "this could change everything" moments in that area. But that's all I could spot :)
Being the sad Dramione fan I am, and proud " i hate Draco when they make him a sap", I am SO thrilled to read your Draco. He's perfect! I really like the way you wrote him! "“I miss house elves. Bloody Hermione Weasley,” Draco muttered" !!! Brilliant, I tell you, Brilliant! : )
Another favorite was when Astoria told Hermione and Ron where Rose and Scorpious were, Ron kept on raving and ranting (so Ron), and Hermione said Thank you (like a mother would.)
I loved this chapter. Thank you for writing :) I'll be looking out for the next update :)
Author's Response: Thanks for letting me know about that little exchange there, you\\\'re right, it is quite awkward. i\\\'m on my way to fix it :)
The reason I can write young married couple so well is because I myself am currently half of a young married couple :) So Scorpius is kind of based off my husband, at least in actions. My thought on it is that Scorpius is trying to play it safe, he doesn\\\'t want to get caught, he wants to enjoy the little time he has with his wife in France, so when she says she knows where he is, he\\\'s kind of reluctant to leave the safe house they have. While he understands it is a pressing matter, he\\\'d rather ignore it just to be with her. She, however, is completely focused upon finding Nate!
Why would Rose want to get all dressed up to go see him? I...don\\\'t really know. Well...I take that back. I kind of know. in the end, I don\\\'t think she really cares, I think she was making a joke about looking like a hobo. Why did I just say I think she was making a joke? I wrote it, lol. I don\\\'t know that she really cared. Maybe I\\\'ll change that...thanks for bringing it to my attention!
Again, I just adore writing Draco, he is so fun. Getting inside his head is thrilling, it really is. If there\\\'s one thing I can\\\'t stand, it\\\'s a poorly written Draco! Also, the use of the word \\\"ferret\\\" as an insult. Did that ever happen in canon? I don\\\'t know but it happens all the time in fanfics. But that\\\'s beside the point.
Thanks so much for reading this! I\\\'ve been a little worried about it because I think chapter 3 was my favorite and I didn\\\'t think this one was as good, but I\\\'m glad you still liked it! I\\\'ll try to get the next one up soon, thanks so much!! :)