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Review:padme_alejandra says:
Hi there :) Episkey from TGS here to review!

CHARACTERIZATION: The line “All they talk about are dark things, and that’s not me. I’m not always dark,” could have been phrased better, I think, to make it seem more Snape-ish. I think it was mostly the ‘and that’s not me’ bit. Perhaps if just that was omitted to make it something along the lines of “All they talk about are dark things and I’m – I’m not always dark.” Though you do what you please, obviously, that’s just personal opinion :)

Other than that tiny, nitpicky thing, you captured Lily and Severus so incredibly well! His kindness and honesty is believable because he loves her, so it’s not OOC in the least. And this formality with which he spoke was entirely fitting of his character – he’s so reserved that it’s perfectly canon for him to act as such. As for Lily, she has always been depicted as loving and kind, so it’s completely realistic that she’d seek Severus out and forgive him. And all her quirks – her hesitation, quick forgiveness, kindness and goodness – are so wonderfully Lily. You have nothing, nothing to worry about :)

OTHER: I had to include an ‘other’ section merely because I wanted to comment on your writing. It’s just… Wow. You string words together so well and your diction just makes me squee. For serious ^_^

I really, really enjoyed this. I wish I had more to say, but the only thing that would come out would be gushing.

Oh, and you made me wish that Christmas would come faster ^_^

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your quick review!! I agree what you've said about my line up there, I'll try to find a different way to word that!

I'm so happy you found favor with my Lily and Severus! This is one of my favorite one shots, but once she accepts his apology, I always worry that I got a bit OOC there, but I'm glad you didn't think so!

And thank you so much for the compliments on my writing!! I really appreciate that it means a lot. They always say that you are your own worst critic, and that definitely applies to me, so you have given my self confidence a definite boost!!

Thanks again for taking time out to write such a lovely review, I will definitely be requesting from you again!! :)

-Ash


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