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Review:Foxtrott says:
Hello! Hahahaha, I'm here again ;D

Ahhh, I wish you'd make a longer chapter D: Whenever I was just getting into the story, I scroll down, and realise its over. :(

Hehe, I still admire your description, and you really striked the right balance between dialogue and description, something I often stuggle with. :D

Oh, yeah: '"...we need more." Remus snapped.' I think it should've been a comma after 'more'. :D

Great job :P

-Foxtrott

Author's Response: Foxtrott!

I promise I'll start doing longer chapters: I hate filling in space with pointless writing which is why this is pretty short! Once the action begins, it'll be too long to read in one go ;)

I'm glad you think I managed to find the right balance, because I find it really difficult not to fly into loads of description: it's what I'm more comfortable with! Thanks for that edit, I'll sort that asap!

Thankyou for your comments!


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