Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:gryffindorseeker says:
I'm so sorry - I've had this story favorited for some time now and I still haven't reviewed! *is a waste of space* Anyway, on to business: I quite like this story, particularly Albus's narration and the concept of a secret society at Hogwarts. (Who doesn't love secret societies? =P) I think you captured Al's inner turmoil well, being caught between his own shortcomings and the legendary accomplishments of his parents and grandparents. His voice was clear in the narration, and I really like the writing style you've chosen for Al. (If that makes sense...) I got a bit confused between Sienna and Anielle because they were introduced close together and both described as these perfect girls, and then along came Jenny, the tomato girl. xD This confusion could be attributed to me having a blonde moment, but I just thought that I'd point out that I was a bit puzzled when I realized that Sienna wasn't Anielle. I imagine that it's imperative to introduce the girls in this prologue, but maybe if you stuck the polar opposite Jenny's introduction between Anielle's and Sienna's, it might be less confusing. Or not - it's your story and you can write it any way you like! =) But overall, this was definitely a good start to what I'm sure will be an intriguing story, and I very much enjoyed it. 10/10, and please update as soon as humanly possible! =D

Author's Response: Your review made me feel so very guilty for not updating *sigh* I was supposed to update ages ago, but I decided to re-write the first chapter (mainly for that horrible McGonagall fiasco) and couldn't get around to doing any of them. I suck.
Don't worry about reviewing late, lol, I always do that. I love secret societies, and I've always wanted to actually write about one. This story is scary to me, it has so many subplots that even I have difficulty keeping up with all of them.
I can totally see why you'd confuse Sienna and Anielle - I haven't gotten the time to introduce them properly, so they seem pretty similar at this moment. That's not so bad though, they'll start standing apart from one another in the future chapters, since they exist on separate planes, so to say. Anielle is a member of the Circle, and Sienna is the girl Albus has a crush on, and they're very different people altogether. I don't think I even have any scenes where they both show up until much, much later.
I'll do my best to update ASAP AND edit the first chapter. Just to let you know, I've decided to have someone else as a Transfiguration teacher. I thought I'd mention that so you won't be surprised when she shows up. I'm working on the story now, so chapter 2 should be up in a week or so. Thank you so much for the SPLENDID review, it totally made my day AND made me feel guilty (which, in the context, is a very good thing :P). Thank you SO much, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the rest of the story. ^_^

Hugs,
CJ


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 981
Submit Report: