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Review:Hermionesclass101 says:
Hi, I'm here to review!

I actually already read this chapter. I thought I reviewed too, but obviously not. =)

I like the plot twists in this chapter. I love the characters you created in Mrs. Jones and Marion, and I love the description.

I absolutely adore your characterization of Merope. She is strong, and independant, moreso than you would think having grown up with an abusive father, and I like that. I love that she is proud of her ancestors, but she doesn't care as much as Marvolo and Morfin. I just love her character overall.

I love Bethe too, mainly because of how nice she is to Merope, who needs a friend. I think that she has dealt with her surprise well; I probably would have fallen over with shock.

Something else I love about this chapter is the way you had all three POVs. And I love your writing style. It completely draws the reader in, and it made me feel as if I was right there viewing all three scenes.

Also, I like that you didn't use the speech from the books word for word. It gave an original flare to the chapter.

grown up who had been in a beastly mood all morning thanks to an immense hangover. - Okay, I'm not really sure why, but I don't like the word 'hangover' in this sentence. I really have no idea why. Maybe because it takes place so long ago. You could try 'thanks to the large amount of alcohol he had consumed the previous night' or something to that effect, but that's just personal taste.

Great job, again! 10/10

~Katie

Author's Response: Hey Katie, thanks for coming by again to leave a review! :) I'm happy that you like Merope and that you think she's a strong character. I like to imagine that she's more than just a pushover; most people assume that is the way she is because it's how we saw her in the books, but the only scenes JKR gave us was when Merope was getting pushed around. At least once her father and brother are out of the picture, I imagine that she grew a little more confident and became herself without anyone to stop her. And of course, now she can do as she likes regarding Tom and having friends, etc.

Bethe dealt with her surprise well because she has always felt different, even when she was a child - the episodes of not remembering what she had said or what had happened, as well as being naturally capable with herbal medicine, have convinced her that there is something else going on that she needs to find out ... which indeed she does. :)

I love writing in different POVs. I've gotten quite a few comments on how well it works, so I think I'm going to keep doing it. It keeps the story interesting for readers, especially if one reader likes or is curious about particular characters or different sides of the story. It also helps me flesh out the story and weave together different plotlines that I otherwise would have had trouble doing.

I agree with you, I couldn't really find a good way to explain how Marvolo was doing but I will try to think of another way to say it. Thanks for telling me. :) What a great review, thank you so much! :D


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