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Review:prongsie_potter_rulez says:
this is very good (: i love the descriptions and characterizations.
but, you see all the exclamation marks? i'm not a huge fan of exclamation marks in stories, as they can be used too much and take away from the emotion - but used correctly, add to it. in some places, it fits in well. but, in places like -
I was safe in his arms. For now!
and -
i feel it would be better with just a single full stop, to puncutate the story more.

the grammer was good, only a few mistakes i can spot. it was a little hurried, but i suppose it is about a battle. (:
well done!

Author's Response: thanks mary, it was a bit rushed :P but i don't know how to do battles. i'll take some of the out, and put a fullstop :)

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