Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Dojh167 says:
Good job! I think that this was quite well written, and I likked how it explored the relationship between Narcissa and Lucius, which is one I have never been much interested in before.

I am quite fond of Narcissa (especcially after DH and my own recent fic about her), and I am pleased to see that interest in her has gone up amongst fans.

I loved the closing line, and how it was all tied back to the love and hope that Narcissa felt, that the Dark Lord could never relate to.

I was quite fond of this scene in DH, but your interpretation of it was different than my own. You connected Narcissa's actions more with her love for Lucius, than for Draco. This didn't really work for me, and I don't think that her motives for lieing and seeking help from Harry to be related with her love for her husband at all.

This made the fic seem somehow disconnected. The part of it that was from DH was done well, and the part about her relation ship with Lucius was very good, but they somehow did not go together.

I would recommend that you write a seperate story about her relationship with Lucius, and instead of having that flashbacks here centered around him, make them about her son and how much she loved him - I think that would allow it to flow much better.

But for the most part, I think it was very well done!

Author's Response: Thank you for taking the time to write such a thoughtful and thought-provoking review!

I hadn't actually realized (as I myself haven't spent much time with either Lucius or Narcissa) that the way I framed the story might seem as though her motivations were centered on Lucius rather than Draco--I see where I could have included more of the family (rather than ambition and husband) into her life's plan, so to speak, so that it would track more with the setting of the scene. I think I perhaps took the mother role a bit for granted when writing this--putting a little too much weight on the readers when it came to that. In any case, I appreciate your perspective on that, though I'll be honest, I probably won't re-write it, as it was a gift fic and is scattered on a few different archives by now.

Again, thank you so much for taking the time to tell me how much you enjoyed it, and what might make it better, in your eyes! I hope I didn't sound too defensive in explaining my mindset while writing it. :)


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 864
Submit Report: