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Review:circinusphoenix says:
Not a bad start, especially for your first fanfiction. There are a few things you may want to consider though, just to help improve your story and help it flow better. I'm writing my first fanfic too, and I always love getting reviews because a lot of the time they help, so hopefully this can do that for you!

Your change point of views a lot, sometimes for just a paragraph. Stories are easier to read if you keep point of views to as few jumps as possible. For example, with Lupin and McGonagall getting ready, you could have it stay in Harry's point of view, and just have Harry notice them getting into position, and that they both knew their purpose (although what was McGongall's purpose? She didn't actually do anything in battling Voldemort).

Just a short question, at the beginning, you say it's a war that has been waging for decades, that would make Harry and the others fairly old, right? How old are they exactly?

That's about it. I think you're doing a great job though. Your writing is good, and Harry's little talk with Voldemort about love was a good part. I'm one of those people not liking the idea of Harry using an Avada Kedavra, since it tears the soul and is dark magic, but it gets it done.

Anyways, I've gone on long enough. Again, good start, congrats on starting a fanfiction, and hope to see you updating soon!

Author's Response: Wow what a review! I am glad that you like it. As for the perspective, I completely agree. It was just a way for me to express the thoughts of all of the characters involved. In future chapters there will be fewer perspective changes. The war had been waging for decades but this is because it had been waging since before Harry was even born. Harry and his friends have only really been out of school for two years (making him about nineteen years old). As for the Avada Kedavra, I know that it is an Unforgivable Curse and is very Dark Magic, but I really couldn't waste time going into the research and development of another method of killing Voldemort. It would draw attention away from the main focus of the story which will develop into the power of granting one wish later in the story. Once again, one of the better reviews that I have read in a long time! Thanks a lot!

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