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Review:Nagini_Strikes_Again says:
Well, it's decently written. I think if you edited it up a bit, and added in a bit more descriptive bits to it, maybe it would work better. I don't like that we just pop into the middle of an action scene, either. It need more work, no doubt about that. I'm not trying to be rude (it just happens sometimes) but, I think if you get beta help, and maybe try making a few more drafts, you can really make this story better. It's just a fanfiction, I know, but wouldn't it be better to write to the best of your abilities, instead of half>> *ahem* ing it? I can see you have a lot of potential, here, and this would be a very interesting story, if only you gave it more of your time. We don't even know the setting where Hermione was dragged off by the angry mob looks like, or what was going on at the time. Were they just in the ministry for tea when Death Eaters came running out of a broom cupboard? Well, I think if you worked more on this, I'd love to read more. In the meantime, have a good *insert time of day*

Author's Response: first of all, thankyou, you've given me some real things to think about, its hard to find someone who will give an honest reveiw and tell the author what needs to be dane. I do need a beta and im planning on getting one, hopefully soon. Thank you for your reveiw and help, much appresiated.

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