It's not easy being a child of the Savior of the Wizarding World.
A collection of humorous one-shots based on various moments in the Potter childrens' lives.
((Perfect banner by GorJesSpazzer!@TDA!))
Author's Note: I really have no idea where this little story came from; I have been dealing with writer's block for quite some time now when it comes to my story "Keeping Secrets", but the other day the idea for this first chapter just came to me. I originally intended for this just to be a one-shot, but the first segment wound up being a bit longer than I anticipated. This is a series of what I hope are funny little anecdotes about the Potter childrens' lives (and it's also my first attempt at writing Next-Gen!) Although I know it goes without saying, anything you recognize belongs to the amazing J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy, and please let me know what you think!
“No Mummy, don’t touch it, it hurts!” James Potter whined, cradling his freshly-scraped knee.
“Jamesie, Mummy has to look at it so that she can heal it,” his mother Ginny replied. She tried to remove her son’s hands once more, but the five-year-old squirmed and turned away.
“No Mummy, I don’t want you to heal it! It will hurt!” James protested again.
Ginny sighed. While she loved being a mother, moments like this one were always a bit frustrating. “Sweetie, I want to make it better. It already hurts,” she said calmly.
“I know!” James cried, “And if you touch it, it will hurt even more!” He seemed frustrated with his mother for not understanding something that seemed so obvious to him.
“I’m not even going to touch it,” Ginny replied, trying to reassure him. “Nothing is going to touch it. I’m going to wave my wand and it will heal, all by itself. All I need you to do is take your hands down so that Mummy can cast the Healing Spell”.
Though Ginny had hoped this statement would reassure her son, it actually had the opposite effect, and he recoiled with a gasp. “But spells hurt Mummy! You and Daddy said that magic is dangerous!”
Ginny smiled and shook her head. Her son hardly ever paid attention, but now here he was, using one of the lessons she and Harry had tried to teach him as a weapon against her. “Yes, some spells can hurt, and magic can be dangerous, and that’s why you must always be careful,” she explained. “But this spell is a good spell, and Mummy has had a lot of practice using it. I promise you, it won’t hurt a bit.”
James still seemed uncertain despite his mother’s explanation, but after a moment of quiet contemplation he slowly began to lower his hands from their protective position around his knee.
Ginny smiled and looked down at him for a moment, and then stood upright brought her wand to the ready. “Thank you, James,” she said quietly. “Now, on the count of three, Mummy is going to flick her wand and say the spell, okay?”
Her son hesitated for a moment, but then said “Okay…” somewhat warily. He covered his eyes with his tiny little hands as his mother started counting, but lowered them just as she said “Episkey!” And, although the spell didn’t hurt at all, seeing his knee suddenly repair itself like that started James so much that he howled as though he were in pain anyway.
Even though she realized that this was just her son’s mind playing tricks on him, Ginny still knelt down and tried to calm him, hugging him tightly.
Before she could calm him down, however, the bedroom door burst open with a loud BANG, startling both Ginny and James so much that they jerked involuntarily. Lifting her eyes to find the source of all the commotion, Ginny saw her husband standing in the doorway with his glasses askew, his wand in one hand and their daughter Lily in the other, panting as though he’d just run all the way up the stairs. “Harry, what’s wrong?” she asked with concern.
“I heard James screaming,” he replied, his eyes wide. “I thought…”
As his voice trailed off, Ginny pieced two and two together and fought to keep a huge smile from spreading across her face. “Everything’s okay,” she said with a laugh. “I was just healing a scrape on James’ knee.”
Looking relieved but also slightly embarrassed, Harry said “Oh”, quietly. Then, before he could embarrass himself further, he added, “Well, I’ll just be downstairs if you need me,” and then walked out, closing the door behind him.
Having completely forgotten about the Healing Spell and the terrible pain he’d been in only seconds before, James looked up at his mother after his father left the room and asked, “Mummy, why did Daddy run up here when he heard me crying?” he asked innocently.
“Because he was afraid you had been hurt,” Ginny answered before kissing her son on the forehead.
“But, when I’m afraid, I run and hide,” James said, clearly not understanding why being afraid had made Harry run towards the source of the noise.
“Yes,” his mother answered, “But your Daddy is all grown up, and he knows how to duel, so if he hears something scary him, he tries to help.”
“But why?” James asked, still confused.
Ginny smiled. “It’s his ‘Savior’ Thing, Jamesie,” she replied.
It was a dreary September 1st, and the Potter family weaved through the heavy traffic in Diagon Alley, picking up James and Albus’ final supplies for another year at Hogwarts. Harry and Ginny, already frazzled from the stress of being in the packed Alley, were now feeling even more flustered as they rushed to make their final purchases; the Hogwarts express would be leaving in just over an hour, and they still needed to Apparate to King’s Cross Station. And while Apparition itself took no time at all, doing so with all three of their children in tow always turned out to be a bit of a hassle.
Unfortunately for Harry and Ginny, however, the business of Diagon Alley and the small amount of time they had left weren’t their only stressors, as James kept further complicating the situation.
“But why can’t I have a Firebolt 9?” he asked for what Harry was sure was the five hundredth time.
“Because we just bought you a Nimbus 2020 last year!” Harry replied, casting an exasperated glance over at his son as the family continued walking.
James seemed astounded by his father’s comment. “So?” he asked, raising his eyebrows, clearly not understanding his father’s reasoning. “The Nimbus 2020 is last year’s model, Dad! That broom is all worn out, it’s ancient!”
“There is nothing wrong with your broom, James,” Harry responded. “I’ve flown it myself, remember?” He kept his face forward this time to show his son that this discussion was over and his decision was final. James, however, had other plans.
“Mum!” he whined.
“Don’t ‘Mum!’ me, Ginny replied from her position opposite James on Harry’s right, “I completely agree with your father. You’re being completely ridiculous, James. You’re almost fifteen, but you’re acting like a five year-old.”
“I’m not being ridiculous, I need a Firebolt 9!” her son insisted. When neither of his parents answered, James crossed his arms over his chest and mumbled something under his breath, but stopped arguing.
After this episode, the family walked on in an awkward silence for several minutes; the only person who spoke was Ginny, to inform everyone that they needed to stop at Slug & Jiggers to buy the boys’ Potions ingredients.
After a ten-minute stay in the Apothecary, the family bustled back out into Diagon Alley, still pressed for time but relieved that they only had one more stop to make before they could leave for King’s Cross. Though still clearly in a bad mood, James had finally completely ceased to mention his Firebolt 9… until they reached the last shop on their list: Quality Quidditch Supplies. When he realized where they were stopping, James inhaled in surprise, but his parents sighed in anticipation of what they knew was coming.
“So, you’re going to get me a Firebolt 9 after all?” James asked, looking as though Christmas had come early.
“No, James,” Harry replied, “I told you, you don’t need a new broom.”
“But then, why are we here?” James asked, now with a look of confusion on his face.
“Because your brother actually does need a broom,” Ginny answered.
The only word that could possibly describe the look that crossed James’ face at that point is betrayal. Mentally, his parents prepared themselves for his outburst.
“So Al can have a new broom, but I can’t?” he asked loudly, not believing how unfair his parents were being. When Harry and Ginny both just glared at him in response, he continued. “Al isn’t even on the Quidditch team!” he exclaimed, his eyes wide.
“He’s a second year now,” Ginny explained, “Which means he’s allowed to try out for the team, which also happens to be why he needs a broom.”
“But it’s not like he’s going to try out for the team anyway!” James retorted. “He stinks at Quidditch!”
“James Sirius!” Ginny scolded, “Don’t let me hear you say that again!”
At this point, Harry intervened, realizing how upset his wife was getting with their older son’s antics. “Listen, James,” he said sternly, “Your brother likes Quidditch, and he’s a good player. He’s going to try out for the Slytherin team, and he’s going to give you and the Gryffindor team a run for your money, isn’t that right, Al?” As he finished speaking, he looked in the direction of where his younger son had been standing a moment ago, only to realize that Albus was no longer there.
Confused, Harry did a double-take and immediately began scanning the area for Al, his heartrate already accelerating to a ridiculous speed. “Albus?” he said again, a little louder. When he still didn’t see the child or get a response from him, his mind went into panic mode and he turned on the spot, drawing his wand and searching both visually and audibly for his son. “Albus?” he called again, but there was no response, which pushed him even closer to a complete meltdown. “AL?!” he practically bellowed, causing several passersby to cast him quizzical glances.
Immediately after this last call, Albus Potter stepped out from behind his older brother, also receiving strange looks from other shoppers. He’d been standing right there behind James the whole time, but had been so busy staring through the window at all of the latest-model broomsticks that he hadn’t even heard one word of his family’s conversation. He’d clearly heard his father’s yelling, however, and his face was a brilliant shade of red.
“I’m right here, Dad!” he replied, clearly embarrassed. When his father exhaled sharply and covered his face with his right hand, Al asked, “What is it? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” Harry replied, removing his hand from his face. “Let’s just get in here and get the broomstick so that we can leave.” With that, he turned and walked into the shop, followed closely by Ginny and little Lily, who was holding on to her mother’s hand.
James started to follow his parents and sister into the shop, but Al stopped him. “What was that all about?” he asked his older brother.
“Dad thought you were lost or you had been kidnapped or something,” James replied.
Al rolled his eyes in response. “Why does he always freak out like that?” he asked rhetorically. “Why did he have to yell my name like that? It’s embarrassing!”
James smiled. “You should be used to that by now,” he replied. “It’s his ‘Savior’ thing.”
Nine year old Lily Luna Potter sat on a bench in the garden of the Potter family home, watching her brothers play against her father in a game of two-on-one Quidditch. She sighed loudly as she watched her family members whiz past, feeling pretty upset that she couldn’t play. She knew that, if she could, she’d be up there alongside her brothers, and with her help, they might actually beat their father for a change. But her father insisted that she was too young to learn to fly yet; he didn’t want her getting hurt.
After having watched for what felt like years, Lily grew tired of just being a spectator as it only made her want to play even more, so she stared down at the ground and swung her legs, kicking the grass. She liked the sound it made as the bottom of her shoes whipped against the blades, and even started humming along with it, inventing a little melody in her head.
As small children often do, little Lily became so completely absorbed in her game that she soon forgot all about her father and brothers and their Quidditch match; she just kept performing her own little garden orchestra piece, humming along with her invented songs as she played. To her ears and imagination, the ‘swoosh’ of the air and the clap of the blades of grass against her shoes were like wind instruments and drums, and her humming was the voice of a seasoned soprano. Together, they all formed the sweetest music she’d ever heard.
The youngest Potter was so busy composing a new, faster piece that she didn’t notice when her father and brothers ended their game and descended, dismounting from their brooms just a short distance away from her. When her oldest brother James called out to her, asking if she agreed that her two brothers had nearly beaten their father, she was a little upset at being interrupted, but nevertheless she nodded her head and smiled at James in response, jumping up off the bench just in time for him to ruffle her hair as he walked past. Lily’s father chuckled in response to this and said, “In your dreams, son” playfully as he and all three of his children began making their way towards the house by the light of the setting sun.
Lily brought up the rear, walking slowly behind her family and making an extra effort to whip her shoes against the blades of grass with each step, wanting to hear the sweet sound just a few more times before she went inside for the night. And, because she was the last in the line of Potters walking inside, she was the first to hear the whining sound.
The redhead stopped immediately and looked around, wondering what the sound was and where it could be coming from. When she noticed the tiny pair of scared-looking eyes peeking out from the nearby bush, rather than to be frightened, her first instinct was to walk over and try to find out what this poor, whining creature was.
As soon as she leaned her face down near the bush, a small, white-furred four-legged creature walked out of it slowly, its two tails tucked down between its hind legs. Lily was positive it was the cutest thing she’d ever seen, and her heart ached for this poor little puppy who was clearly lost and in need of a good home.
“Well hello there!” she said brightly. Without one moment’s hesitation or fear, she reached out and petted it on the head, and the puppy responded by jumping into her arms and licking her on the face, causing Lily to burst into fits of laughter.
“Daddy, look!” she cried between giggles, “It’s a lost puppy! Can we keep him?”
Instead of the “Yes, absolutely!” response she was hoping for, what Lily heard instead was a horrified cry of, “Lily! Get away from that thing!”
Startled and confused as to why her father was yelling, Lily slowly backed away from the pup, which caused it to start whining once more. She wanted to go back and comfort the crying animal, but the way her father was running over with wild eyes and his wand aimed made her afraid to do so.
Harry reached the bush in just a moment and ordered James to make sure his sister was okay while he kept his wand aimed at the creature, preparing to conjure some sort of cage to trap it in. As James checked Lily over for any cuts, scrapes, or bite marks, she began to cry.
“Daddy it didn’t hurt me, it’s just a little puppy and he’s all alone. Can we keep him Daddy, please?”
“No, Lily, we can’t,” Harry replied. “I’m not sure what that is, but it’s not a dog – it’s got two tails! I’ve never seen anything like it before and it could be dangerous.”
“But he’s not
dangerous Daddy, he licked me!” Lily argued. “He likes me!”
“You let it lick you?!” Harry cried, now turning his attention away from the puppy to examine his daughter for himself. Lily didn’t respond, she just stared at her father with wide, tear-filled eyes, not understanding what was happening.
Sensing his little sister’s sadness, James told his father, “Dad, she’s fine. It didn’t hurt her, it seems harmless enough to me.”
“Well I’m not willing to risk your sister’s life just on the fact that it seems
harmless, James. Take Lily inside, we’ll take her to St. Mungo’s, just in case.”
Little Lily began to cry even harder now, not wanting to go to St. Mungo’s or
abandon the puppy. Before she could open her mouth to protest, however, the back door of their family home opened, revealing a very concerned-looking Ginny. Without a moment’s hesitation, Lily flew to her mother’s side, clinging on to her for dear life and glaring out at her father and brothers with a hurt look. She knew if anyone would be on her side about this, it was her mum.
Ginny was a bit taken back at first, but her arms quickly wrapped around her daughter protectively as she asked her husband, “What’s all this yelling about?”
Trying to communicate the seriousness of the situation without alarming his wife, Harry said calmly, “Lily’s found some sort of strange animal over here, and she let it lick her. I’m sure she’s fine, but we’ll need to take her to St. Mungo’s, just to be safe.”
Horrified, Ginny gasped, tightened her grip on her daughter and asked, “What sort of creature?”
“I’m not sure,’ Harry replied. “It looks a bit like a dog, but-“
The elder redhead didn’t let her husband finish his sentence. “A dog?” she asked with raised eyebrows. “You want to take Lily to St. Mungo’s because a dog licked her?”
“No, it’s not
a dog, Ginny. It looks
like a dog, but it’s got two tails. I’ve never seen anything like it before,” Harry replied.
Ginny gasped once more. “Two tails? Is it a crup?” She looked down at her daughter, addressing her this time. “Did you find a crup, dear?” As Lily didn’t know the answer, she merely looked up at her mother with a pout and shrugged her shoulders. “Well let’s find out then, shall we?” Ginny continued.
Removing her arms from around her daughter and taking hold of her hand, instead, Ginny began making her way over to where Harry was standing, looking around on the ground for the mystery creature. When she saw it, her face lit up. “Oh, it is
a crup!” she exclaimed. “He’s so adorable!” She immediately squatted down and began calling the animal over to her.
“Ginny, I don’t think that’s a good id-“ Harry began, but his wife cut him off once more.
“Oh, hush, Harry!” she said in a voice that reminded Harry of her mother’s. “It’s a crup, a magical dog breed. I'm certain you've seen one before in Care of Magical Creatures class, and if you'd paid any attention then you'd know that he’s completely harmless.” She continued calling the crup over to her, and in just a few moments’ time, the entire family, minus Harry, of course, was on their knees petting and playing with the pup, who was clearly enjoying the attention.
Lily asked once more if they could keep the crup, this time echoed by her older brothers. But, though Ginny wanted to say “yes” immediately, she knew that Harry was uncomfortable with the situation, so she merely told the children that she and their father would have to discuss it later, but that for now they could at least make sure the puppy had food and water. And as James, with his mother’s supervision, carried the puppy inside their home, Lily hung back a bit to ask her other brother a question that had been weighing on her mind for several minutes now.
“Al,” she began quietly, “Why does Daddy hate puppies?”
Al snorted in response. “He doesn’t hate puppies, Lils. He just didn’t know that was
“But, he aimed his wand at it!” Lily replied. “He was going to hurt it!”
“He wasn’t going to hurt it,” her older brother corrected. “He was just trying to protect you.”
“But it wasn’t even dangerous. So why?”
Lily asked, clearly not able to wrap her head around their father’s behavior.
In response, Albus threw his head back and laughed for a moment before wrapping his right arm around his sister’s shoulder and leaning down to whisper in her ear. “That, little sister,” he said matter-of-factly, “Is his ‘Savior’ thing.”