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Disclaimer- I am terribly sad to announce how do not own Harry Potter or anything else you may recognize or anything remotely spiffy either :(
A/N- mmk, this new story is called The Stars Up Above and so far its really long and i havent even gotten to the present yet so the next couple of chapters will still be in the past until the story jumps to her 5th year at hogwarts. sounds good? The whole story is sort of a dark mystery with random humor and romance mixed in. Please tell me if you like it so far too in that nifty review box below :)
CHAPTER 1- I am...Scared
Blank, emotionless, cold eyes happen to be one of the few things that come to mind when I think of my parents. Don’t get me wrong though, it’s not their eyes I’m talking about. I’m talking about the eyes of the man who started everything. Everything for me at least, no matter what he has done with his life since then he will forever be the man who took everything and started everything to me. I have no name of his man, just a fading face in my memory were he shall always be. He is in my nightmares constantly and I’m afraid of forgetting him.
Because forgetting the man who started everything means forgetting the night that ended everything, and that night's apart of me. That night changed my life forever for the worst yet I can’t help but think how I wouldn’t be the same person if that night never happened. I don’t want to be another person though. I’m happy being Nettie Reed and only Nettie Reed, I’m happy with my life even with my dark past and even though you have no idea of what I am talking about I have a feeling that in time you will have a better understanding of my life so far. Of my sleepless nights all the way to rolling on the flour laughing for hours about absolutely nothing. I bet I sound pretty pathetic, huh? Well anyway, the reason for my dramatics is the need to tell my story. My story starts on that said night, more specifically April 22, 1968, when I was 8 years old. On that day my life changed and even my 8 year old self wasn’t stupid enough to believe it hadn’t. On that day a little part of me died. Never to be seen again no matter how hard I searched for it.
I don’t want to bore you with the little details I remember but I feel that it’s necessary if you want to get to know me. You see my life was great before that day. My mother would play with me all day while my father was at work, and when he came home we would have a family dinner and after dinner if it was a weekend we would all watch a movie with each other and eat popcorn mixed with Bertie Bott’s every flavor beans. My father would drive me into town sometimes and we would go out to lunch and visit candy stores. I loved my parents more than anything as they were my best friends. We lived in the middle of nowhere and I was the only child younger than 14 who lived within walking distance. But I didn’t mind. I was happy being the only child, the daddy’s girl and I was never lonely. Of course I knew I wouldn’t have no friends my age forever as I was due to go to Hogwarts when I turned 11, but the thought of leaving my parents for a whole school year really wasn’t appealing. I was only 8 though and I would have had ages to overcome my fear and enjoy my years being a half blood witch at Hogwarts.
There was this one time when my daddy and I went into Diagon Alley for some stuff mommy needed. I still remember the feel of daddy’s hand as it cradled mine, swinging up high just for the fun of it. I wanted to get some ice cream but I had to wait until everything else was dealt with, that is until I saw the ice cream store and just had to have a sample of the new pumpkin flavor. Daddy had already let go of my hand to look at the grocery list again so the timing was just right according to the hungry stomach of one little girl. I sneaked through the crowds of busy shoppers and made my way over to the shop. The ice cream was great and to this day I still love my pumpkin ice cream, but when I started looking for my daddy I completely lost it and burst into tears right on the sidewalk. My daddy eventually found me, hugged me, and scolded me but it was a horrible experience to think that I would never get to see him again along with my mommy.
I never got the chance to say good bye, let alone get over my separation problem. It all happened too quickly. I remember it too well for my liking even though the memory’s fading; the night was a warm one with billions of twinkling stars looking back at me through the circle window above my bed. I remember looking at those same stars all night, I couldn’t fall asleep no matter how many times I closed my eyes and counted the fluffy sheep of my mind. I remember trying to gently touch one of the stars with my small pointer finger wanting to grab hold and pull the beauty all the way to my bed side. I would close my eyes and try to see every star in my head so I could dream of them, but when I would open my eyes I would see something completely different in the maze of brilliant light spears. For hours I would stare at those dots feeling so insignificant under the universe, a bug on the sidewalk that you never think twice about. Under my breath I sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star softly making a wish as I sang. That wish hasn’t come true so far and as stupid as it sounds even today I will not speak a word of that wish in fear of it not coming true. For me, that wish is very important, and I’m not about to let it fly away into that wonderful maze of beautiful light.
I had finally fallen asleep with my last conscious thought wondering what mommy and I would play the next day. Maybe a few minutes later or maybe a few hours I’m not sure but the next thing I knew my whole world was vibrating under my bed. It was a terrifying thought that my house was blowing up but that’s what I thought was happening. That is until I heard a scream, a blood stopping screech that broke my heart, a sound I will never forget and have never in my short 15 years of living. I recognized the voice as my mothers, but it wasn’t hers anymore. Her loving soft voice was taken over by intense fear and regret. Regret of what was another question altogether. My breath caught in my throat and I couldn’t think right. The only thing going through my mind was “why is mommy sad?” I needed to make my mommy feel better and that thought took me out of my warm, fluffy bed, grabbing my teddy bear on the way and out of my small octagonal bedroom.
The whole house was quiet then and I didn’t know what to do. It seemed to me that nobody was there except me and being alone scared me even more than the idea that someone was in my home. Across the hall from my room happened to be my parent’s bed room. The door had been wide open when I turned in the threshold and when I turned again the door was closed. Instantly I felt a chill run down my spine and considered rushing back to bed with Teddy but I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway. Instead I had opened the newly closed door not knowing what to expect. The room was dark, the only light coming from the open window. A warm yet chilling breeze swayed the curtains and had made me shiver, clutching Teddy close to my chest for protection. I had seen Mommy and Daddy’s bed empty even through the darkness and had immediately ran over to the window wildly thinking that Mommy had fallen and Daddy had followed. The wind made my short hair flutter around my head making me unable of seeing anything for several seconds. I looked out the window clutching the bottom with my left hand and holding Teddy’s arm with the other and saw a man. Despite my horrible memory the man had been tall, thin, and slightly hunched. He stood by my favorite tree in the front yard close to the dirt road that went into town. Even from the second floor window I had still made out a gray sweatshirt with the hood over his head making it impossible to see underneath. I had been frozen with fear and just wanted everything back to normal and had started to cry. Through my blurry vision I had seen the man raise his skinny arm and pull the hood back just enough to see a small portion of his face where the shadow had missed. His eyes are my nightmare. Our eyes locked despite the distance between us, I saw absolutely nothing. They were orbs of brilliant blue but dull and unsmiling. The life had been sucked from his eyes and replaced by unmerciful hatred and pride. Pride of what, I did not know. My parents weren’t in sight anywhere near the man and I was still terribly scared and worried. I was shaking and my teeth chattered at top speed as if I was cold.
As you can imagine when the aurors arrived I was so relieved I had broken down into hard sobs. Nobody was found in the house when they came and they searched all night and the next day for my mom and dad.
After what happened I was apparited right away to the guest entrance of the ministry of magic. To distract myself from the panicking wizards I had memorized my surroundings from the street names to the musky smell of an alley close by. I was scared, terribly scared, and if smelling a urine infested alley would take me away from what was happening I would have smelled 50 more. The entrance of the ministry was nothing special if not slightly entertaining but whatever I was feeling about the bright red phone box was quickly replaced by the shock I got from the actual ministry itself.
It was simply beautiful and I almost felt bad for thinking such thoughts when my parents were missing. My sleep deprived mind has left out details of what I saw and even though I knew it was a lovely sight I just can’t get myself to remember even what the floor looked like, and believe me that floor had quite a staring match with me. Maybe it’s the fact that everyone who knew what happened or was even there gave me the biggest eyes full of bursting sympathy. Their sympathy did nothing more than terrify me to the point where I couldn’t see anything behind my soggy pupils.
That night was the longest and loneliest of my life and it had nothing to do with not sleeping a wink, not that I could anyway. All night I was questioned on anything that would help find me parents, and not even when the questioners called it a night did I sleep. Not even when I was provided with a bed far warmer and bigger that my own did I close my eyes. Because I just couldn’t. Because just maybe, when I close my eyes I would see everything again, smell everything the same, and feel the exact same feelings I had when I finally figured out that I would never see my parents smile at me every again.
The morning after was oddly quiet and I didn’t like it. First of all my 8 year old mind was as slow as it is now and didn’t even remember what had happened the night before. Lying down in a foreign bed covered with expensive sheets designed to relax a back in a white walled room did I finally remember. And I screamed.
The next day they had found them already dead by the killing curse.
My parents died that day, on April 22. I was 8 years old and I didn’t know what was happening, but I now know why those men attacked us while we slept. My father was one of the top writings for the Daily Prophet and he wrote a story on the rights of Muggle-borns and half breeds and how they should have more rights. Well, those same guys that came to my house and made my mother scream that scream in my nightmares, found out about my father’s written story. Let’s just say they didn’t like it and decided to pay the writer a little visit. And you know what happened next.
But the one thing that really gets my blood boiling is that Daddy’s story wasn’t even published.
Disclaimer: of course i own the harry potter books!
Who doesn't?! i mean, there right up there on my book shelf! i can see them from here! wait...that's not what you meant was it...? ...they really should make stuff like this more clear...right er..well no i do not own anything you may recognize, most likely JK Rowling does...that lucky duck...
AN: Hello and welcome to chapter 2 i have nothing to really say except thank you for getting this far and remember to please review once you get to the end and ask your self if you should take the time to write a response. Please take the time!! i don't mind is you say mean stuff! ...well actually i do but if you must please give it to my nicely if you can :)
CHAPTER 2: …Changed
Nettie’s point of view.
For those few hours until I was to go live with my grandmother I never spoke a word and just sat in a long white room with many office cubicles and workers too busy to look my way twice. I didn’t want to live with my grandmother because let’s face the facts, for one she is the most horrible person I know for many reasons, two she hated my father and in extension hates me also, three I just had a bad feeling that I would not have a good life while living in that house.
And I didn’t.
I was apparited to the door step of a dark blue home in London. Not too big and not to small the house looked as if it should have more people living in it then two, yet had the air of never being lived in before, as if it was newly built. The man who apparited me seemed distracted and had not noticed the glare my elderly grandmother had given me upon the grand door opening. She smiled a one toothed smile at the man, said a few sentiments of how horribly dreadful the tragedy was, grabbed my arm roughly, and without further ado slammed the door on the still distracted shocked man.
Over the months I lived there, my grandmother had not feed me more than a few breed slices a day while muttering angrily to herself about the air I was so greedily breathing. To get away from her deadly cane she would whack me with constantly I would walk around London looking for Diagon Alley thinking that when I found it I could buy some clothes easily forgetting the money I would need for that. Sure I still had the clothes and belongings from home but grandmother did not approve of stuffed animals or games or anything fun for that matter. And for the clothes I was growing fast and needed to get bigger sizes or I would forever be severely uncomfortable.
My grandmother got so fed up with my complaining that she gave me a few Galleons a month from then on for clothes and a better diet. Worst guardian ever. I mean really, who does that? An 8 year old almost 9 year old needs love and care, and her under care has made me smaller and paler than nature had intended. Not to mention the bruises I got from the deadly cane.
On my 9th birthday I used my saved up money and bought a few sundresses. They were the easiest thing to buy as they were shirts and pants in one for the price of one at any cheap children’s store. I went for quantity, not quality, so I had gotten them to last until I could buy more clothes of variety. It was also on my birthday; wearing a new bright purple dress did I finally found a familiar pub. I remember feeling the warmest feeling I had felt in almost a year as I walked straight to the entrance at the back. Luckily somebody was in the middle of opening it and all I had to do was watch quietly as the man preformed the complicated wand movements. When he was done I squeezed past him without him even noticing an underfed little girl overwhelmed by the happy shoppers.
That day a lot of things happened. Please don’t think anything bad of me for what I’m about to tell you because I know it was wrong and yes I do regret almost everything I have done, but at the time it was necessary. I had picked up the joy of stealing. I needed food, my stomach was making that much clear and I had spent all my money on my new wardrobe. My two options were to stick it out and go home, eat my scraps and become even hungrier or to steal a bag of dragon fired warm chestnuts from the roadside vendor across from Flourish and Blotts. I chose the latter in case you haven’t been paying attention and those chestnuts were the best thing to pass through my mouth in so long I had forgotten what it was like to enjoy eating. And so my survival hobby had begun.
I stole a lot. Mostly food to keep me going, but sometimes I stole clothes and even colored pencils to entertain me when stuck at home. I went to Diagon Alley even more just to look at the happy faces of the children my age. I wanted a friend and even more I wanted a friend I could be happy with. I began noticing a boy my age who went to Diagon Alley as much as I went. He was always dressed in expensive clothes that could feed me for a month. He never smiled though, and despite his obvious wealth I could sense more to him then what meets the eye. He was always there throughout the rest of my 9th year and my 10th and not once did I even say hello but more than I can count did we meet eye contact. I could tell he was curious about me and me about him but we still didn’t speak.
Once I turned 11 years old every day until I was to get my letter felt like an eternity. I didn’t know when Hogwarts letters were supposed to come but I couldn’t help but give up once the summer drew to a close. On the day I had finally gotten my letter I had almost given up all hope when an owl carrying none other than my acceptance letter promptly flew right into the window next to my small bed waking me up from a peaceful sleep. Once seeing the Owl shaking its head I had jumped up out of bed and rushed over to let it in. Once in the bird nipped my hand as if placing the window in that exact place was a deliberate plow to make its head suffer. The owl placed the letter neatly in my outstretched hand and flew out of the now open window with dignity. Before opening it I first had dressed in my favorite outfit, a baby doll blue shirt courtesy of a much needed “shopping spree” and a pair of jean shorts I had gotten the month before. Grandma Evil as I so creatively dubbed her was still asleep when I got my letter despite the noise the bird had made.
My letter had finally came, the letter from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to be exact. I was so happy I started jumping up and down singing a song about the joys of leaving my own personal hell hole until next year. I had heard so much about Hogwarts since I could talk and walk as my father had gone there and loved it. He told me to take the bad with the good and that is what I intended to do. No more self pitying! I was going to enjoy Hogwarts if it was the last thing I did and forget about my past as much I could. No more stealing either! Well that is until I got all my Hogwarts supplies. It would be a new beginning for me. I would be able to smile a real smile. As I jumped and sang and thought of my new promising future another eager 11 year happened to be jumping up and down and thinking of his own future. A future that included his own beliefs and not the beliefs of robot parents and horrible cousins.
I, Reinette Reed, am going to Hogwarts. That was the one sentence that went through my mind over and over throughout the summer before I was to go. I had already gotten the necessary books and robes, and I am proud to say that I did not have to steal any of it. It turns out that Grandma has a conscience, and even though she’s still the worst guardian in the history of people, she had given me enough money for my supplies and even some left over to buy a small kitten upon reading the letter herself. I’m pretty sure it had to do with the whole not seeing me for a year but whatever flouts her boat. My kitten Jenkins and I were happy.
Grandma drove me to the train station on September 1st with just over 20 minutes to get on the train. I had dressed in my bright purple sun dress which had be them faded and had a hole in it from running way from angry shop keepers. It was still my favorite dress though and I just had to wear it on my first day of Hogwarts. Grandma didn’t get out of the car and without further ado promptly drove away without a glance back. I remember being doubly nervous when I didn’t know what to do next. I had hastily glanced down at the tattered and worn letter in my hand and looked around for platform 9 and ¾ having many people staring at me, my trunk and the black kitten in the nuke of my other arm. Finally I found the barrier and strategically leaned up against it the way my father had bragged to be such a champ at.
I hate being stared at. And when you go through that barrier, and face the Hogwarts crowd, nobody ever has time to spare you a glance in between the cries of goodbyes and greetings of laughter from those you haven’t seen in “forever”, nobody ever stars at you. I remember thinking of how much I was going to like it there. And on that note I waltzed over to the fancy grand door of the Hogwarts Express and found a compartment all to myself.
Looking at the hugging people through the newly cleaned windows got me thinking about the kind of person I wanted to be. First of all, I wanted to shed all of my past. I was a new person and should therefore act like one. Of course I wouldn’t get rid of my clothes considering I would have nothing to wear on the weekends but I could do some serious tweaking on the inside. My name would definitely have to go. It reminded me too much of my mother whose name was also Reinette and besides I hadn’t spoken the name since they died and Grandma hadn’t called me anything near it, preferring names like “ignorant air waster” and “dirty little cockroach”.
Well excuse me Grandma, it’s not my fault I’m dirty, now is it?
I would have to shorten the name to something else. After much deliberation I had come up with a nickname I could live with. From then on I was to be known as Nettie Reed. The stealing in my life had to go also. There was no way I would be going into Hogwarts as a common thief. My appearance was something I had already tweaked a few years back after growing out my black super curly hair past my shoulders with some side bangs to at least look as if I care even a little about how my hair looks. As much as I hated it, I couldn’t change my height, forever being severely short forever. Another thing I would have the change was the way I looked at life. Ever since that night I had been severely sad, bordering on depressed but since that train ride I was to love and live life to its fullest. Being happy and always finding the good in people before the bad and most of all smiling a lot more then I used to. Overall I was quite pleased with my new self and couldn’t wait to make some friends. That is until I saw the same unsmiling boy who I had acquired a complicated relationship with.
He was outside of my compartment smiling and laughing with three other first years by the looks of things. Upon hearing a bark of a laugh I made a double take with my eyes bugging out of their sockets. He was smiling. Not just smiling, he was laughing, full blown sides hurting laughs. Who knew mister unsmiling has a personality? It was then, staring openly at the wealthy boy, did I finally realize what was going on. Unsmiling boy knew who I was, heck he’s seen me steal and be the thief I used to be so many times that he could recognize me and boom! Mission tweaked life would be out of the bag and nobody would want to be friends with me anymore. He couldn’t do that though! I worked too hard on my new tweaking to have them go to waste with a simple “Hey, it’s that poor thief from Diagon Alley!” I breathed in sharply and without meaning to cause the four joyful boys to stop their laughing fit and take notice to my small panicking form within the compartment.
Not good! Not good!
A/N: Alrighty well i think its a bt umm late? Ok i get it. I messed up. Big time. I could bore you will the details but i dont think that would help anything. But im back for good now and a have a bunch of chapters all written and shiny and have a bunch of new ideas. :D Enjoy!
CHAPTER 3: …Nettie, Hear Me Roar!
My eyes which had shrunken back into their normal size had instantly grew again when unsmiling boy looked as if he recognized me and was about to say something. Thinking fast I jumped up, ripped the door open, grabbed his arm, and sped walked all the way to the back of the train to the changing rooms hearing random panicked questions sprung up from his throat left and right. When we were safely in a locked changing room I let go of his arm and knelled on the wall sinking down on the floor. I had looked up at him with my big blue eyes and pleaded to his confused grey ones. “Please, just hear me out real quick, it won’t take long. The thing is…I’m not a bad person. And I know stealing is wrong and all and I’m never going to do it again and yes I know most of my possessions are made up purely of…well what I stole. What I really wanted to ask you-well more like beg- and why I dragged you here-I’m really sorry about that by the way-was if you could not tell anybody about my past…hobby, I would be really grateful because I’m kind of changing my ways and tweaking my life-which is surprisingly difficult- and I really want to make friends that don’t think I’m a criminal rebel punk kid and...Err... well that’s all I have to say, so what do you say? Will you help me and not say anything about my past? Please.”
At this point he just looked stunned at my rant and even I was surprised too, “That’s more than I’ve said at one time in years,” I had muttered, not realizing it was said out loud until it was too late. The boy seemed to unfreeze at that and just looked curiously down at me while I took up staring at the floor. Everything was terribly quiet then and I didn’t know what to do or even if he heard or registered what I had said. Finally he spoke in a soft yet cautious voice.
“Why did you steal in the first place if you didn’t want anyone to know you do it? As much as you might think otherwise, you are a criminal….and a rebel.”
That hurt. But I would never show it and besides, when what he said registered in my mind I was already over the hurt and was suddenly angry at him.
“You don’t know me!” I exclaimed, jumping up from the ground, my eyes blazing. “Excuse me for not having everything I ever wanted handed to me on a silver platter! Some people have to work for what they get and some people can’t even do that.” I spat at his now surprised face. I lowered me voice to a deadly whisper with a glare to match. I had reached up to his tall height and met his own angry eyes. “I stole because I had to, without it I would have starved and I would be wearing nothing but bed sheets right now. I didn’t want to be a criminal and please, I don’t have anyone to rebel against except the law but I’m pretty sure the whole criminal thing has already done the law rebelling quite nicely.” I stepped back away from him and leaned up against the wall once more and crossed my arms tightly against my chest, gazing up at him from across the changing room as he to leaned up against his own wall.
We stared at each other for a few silent minutes in an almost comfortable air. I felt it ok to move my eyes away from his own and move down his body. He was already wearing his school uniform, and even though all uniforms were virtually the same I had recognized them as the more expensive fabric the store had carried for only exclusive shoppers. My eyes strayed back to his face and took in the familiar jet black locks and perfectly sculpted face. I then noticed that he too had taken the moment to look over my own outfit.
“I only ever see you wearing dresses,” He stated as a question, his eyes racing to meet mine once again.
“Their cheaper,” I had simply put it. I then searched his eyes for any emotion other than his blank stare, upon seeing no visual reactions I briefly smiled a tiny smile, my eyes still locked onto his.
“I won’t tell anyone anything I know of your past. Which isn’t much, mind you, only your-as you so greatly put it-hobby,” I sighed in relief and relaxed my uptight stance. “What’s your name?” he asked curiously, tilting his head to the side slightly.
I had wondered what to tell him but ended up wanting to tell him the truth. “My names Reinette Reed, but please don’t call me Reinette. Call me Nettie instead.” I said with a tone in my voice that said the subject was closed. “What’s yours?” I asked slightly ecstatic that I would finally learn his name.
“The names Sirius Black, and if you call me Siri i'll kill you,” He smirked, completely at ease. He then looked as if he regretted something but only for a second before looking relaxed again. “What do you say to coming to sit with my friends and I, considering they already took your compartment and all.”
“Sure, I guess I could survive four boys for a train ride.” By then the train had already started moving and was well into the country. I moved to the door with him in tow and be begun our walk back to the others. “If there your friends when did you meet them?” By the look on his face he could tell I was referring to his lonesome Diagon Alley days. He seemed hesitant with his answer as if he was trying to decide whether to edit the truth or not.
“I meet them outside when they all so rudely ran into my mother, knocking her down,” he had said while trying to suppress a grin. “Actually it wasn’t sad at all. I quite liked seeing miss tight lip fall straight on her fat butt.” By then he couldn’t take it anymore and doubled over in extreme laughter, clutching his stomach. If I couldn’t hear the joy in his voice I would have thought he was in terrible pain. And to my surprise I had soon joined in and we both were on the floor still laughing and clutching the sides of the corridor and each other for support.
We began to walk towards the compartment once more each lost in our own thoughts before Sirius spoke again. “Ya know, I haven’t laughed this much in a long time?” He asked in a wistful tone, looking straight ahead. Before I could answer he was already talking again. “I really like it, laughing that is.” he smile, laughing slightly, "I bet that’s the most you’ve laughed in a long time too,” Sirius stated rather than questioned, still looking straight ahead. I was surprised that he could pick that up so quickly, did I look that miserable? It had sort of slipped my mind that that boy hadn’t seen me laughing or looking remotely happy in Diagon Alley. The only time he had saw me smiling was when I got to eat chestnuts but I didn’t even know that he had seen me eat my favorite food.
“Yeah, It was,” I said in a low voice looking down the corridor as he was. “I’d rather laugh for something that I find funny, than laugh to keep from crying,” I thought about what I had said realizing the truth in it. “Not that I cry or anything,” I had added quickly, feeling the need to redeem myself. “I haven’t cried since…well since what happened,” I muttered my thoughts, not realizing I had said it out loud. I had quickly glanced over at Sirius to check how well his hearing was. It was good. He still had stared in front of him but his eyebrows had scrunched up together, his eyes curious and questioning, questioning a question that I was not planning on answering for a long time.
“What do you mean?” Sirius asked cautiously. His eyes kept flickering to mine, still walking.
“Nope, sorry Sirius, not today,” I said cheekily as I stopped at a door with three very loud voices behind it. Sirius had stopped walking and spun around fast to face me with a mischievous gleam shining deep in his grey eyes.
“Well then, I'll just have to keep asking, now won’t I?” he said just as cheeky, already half way through the door, not giving me the chance to respond.
“One day I’ll tell you,” I had muttered to myself also walking into the compartment. When I walked in I saw the three boys who were standing behind Sirius before, all wrestling on the floor. My immediate thought was that they were fighting each other because they were mad at each other but then my brain registered their laughter. I was confused. Never in my whole life had I even heard of fighting as fun and then BOOM, I walk in on three boys fighting as if it was the most fun they’ve ever had. In that moment of my life I knew one thing for sure.
Boys were the weirdest creatures to ever walk the Earth.
Sirius then started laughing all over again and I couldn’t help but smile at the stunned boys who had by they seized their struggles. The tallest of the three jumped up and sat on the bench acting as if he had been there the entire time. The other two stared after him for less than a second before copying him moves except on the bench opposite. Sirius still chuckling sat next to the tall boy and I sat next to him, putting my legs on the bench as I leaned my back up against the window.
After awhile the five of us seemed to forget about the wrestling as Sirius introduced me to them. “This is my best friend, Nettie. Nettie, these are my other best friends,” he said while pointing to me. I was surprised that he called me his best friend but was pleased all the same. He then started pointing to each of the boys in turn as he spoke their names, “this is James Potter,” he said pointing to the tall boy next to him. James had saluted me with a smile but said nothing. “This happens to be Peter Pettigrew,” Peter waved shyly with a just as shy smile on his face as mine. “And this guy is Remus Lupin,” Remus had a kind smile which went nicely with his warm brown eyes. I smiled naturally at them all and we began to talk about the year ahead at Hogwarts.
“I for one can’t wait till I’m safely in front on the Gryffindor common room fire. My dad’s told me loads of times of how much he loved Gryffindor and being brave through and through!” James had exclaimed when the subject of houses came up. Personally I wanted to be a Ravenclaw because that’s what my own father had been but I smiled and nodded like the rest of us when James wanted a reaction. We started to talk more about the other houses and which ones were the best to be in when the subject of Slytherin house happened to come up. Sirius grew very nervous when Slytherin came up but I don’t think any of the others realized this as they were to into James’s speech about the horribleness of said house. I didn’t listen much as I couldn’t care less about house rivalry but when he started to say more about specific people in Slytherin house I was intrigued. James spoke of the house of Black, Malfoy, Lestrange, and many more families notorious for being Slytherins among other things. He told us about the things his dad had told him about as he works in the ministry and hears a lot about the Slytherins after Hogwarts. He finished his speech, which took about a half hour mind you, with jumping up onto his seat and holding his arm up as if holding the Gryffindor sword, which he told us about half way through the never ending speech , and he had then swung the imaginary sword above his head. Peter had started clapping rapidly, his eyes on the nonexistent sword while Remus just rolled his eyes. Sirius was still looking nervous and I was looking questioningly at him trying to make eye contact, but he kept moving his eyes away as if he was avoiding them with all of his might.
James had plopped down back to his seat. During his speech he seemed too had gained excitement to the point that when he stopped talking his legs took up swinging and he couldn’t stop grinning with his hazel eyes wide and shinning. I remember James finally coming back to Earth once he saw the internal struggle Sirius was having. Sirius had taken up staring out of the window even though he wasn’t next to it. His eyes looked troubled and his eye brows were scrunched up in anger as if he was remembering a terrible nightmare that he just wanted to forget. His jet black hair hung close to his eyes in elegant waves so that I could barely see the grey eyes I already loved.
James had looked intently at his best friend of less than an hour, Sirius who had seemed to sense the stare turned to look at James curiously as if nothing had happened. I’m not sure what Remus and Peter were doing at the time as I was too interested in what the other two boys were doing at the moment but whatever they were doing was stopped when they to wondered what was wrong with Sirius.
“Sirius, are you ok? You look troubled,” James stated keeping eye contact with him.
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” The only thing I can possibly say to that one sentence uttered by Sirius Black is how great of a liar he was and still is. He had perfect eye contact and tone and even then I was amazed at how well he lied and how gullible James had been. But I knew better. I knew he wasn’t ok and he knew I knew he wasn’t ok. The look on my face as he turned back around to face the window made it quite clear that I knew what was bothering him. I wasn’t stupid enough to miss what James had said about the Black family and I sure as hell wasn’t stupid enough to miss the tiny fact that Sirius’s last name was Black either.
After that all of us started talked and joking with each other and had became fast friends so that when the train stopped we had already promised to be best friends forever. To bad that wouldn't be the case.
A/N: Super, super quick update might i remind you :) Enjoy
Disclaimer: I do not own anything you may recolonize in the wonderful JK Rowling books :)
CHAPTER 4: …A first year
My sorting was weird to say the least. It took longer than any other first year but i'll get more into that when I get there. Once the boys and I had got off the train we were immediately pushed and shoved to the point where I could only recognize James in the crowd of hungry students. James and I squeezed our way through and came upon the tallest man I had ever seen. He looked to be more than 7 feet tall and compared to my extremely short height I had felt like a speck of dust in front of him. His beard was long and bushy and looked as if he hadn’t brushed it in years and as I looked closer at it I saw little bits of chocolate cake. The cake had only made me hungrier and I quickly grabbed James’s hand and pushed on to wear the cakey giant man had pointed for the first years.
By the time we had gotten to the boats which I had vaguely remembered from James’s speech all of the other first years were chatting as they slowly lowered them self’s into the small dark boats, if you can even call it a boat. James and I had looked for the others with no luck so we decided to get in a boat by ourselves and look for them once we got to the castle. Speaking of the castle, at that time I still hadn’t seen Hogwarts and was so nervous my hands shook and I had to keep them clamped up in my lap in fear of James seeing and thus making fun of me. I didn’t want to seem week in front of my new friends as much as I could. I had been trying hard to see the castle that I hadn’t even noticed the girl who had stumbled in the boat. Well not exactly stumbled, more like slip on the side of the boat as she tried to climb in and accidently fell off and into the water. The scream and small splash brought me back to Earth and as I was about to jump in to save her I realized that James was already standing up diving off the side. I had held my breath and at that moment it seemed like the whole world was holding its breath with me, waiting to see what would happen.
Within a few seconds James had broken through with a big gust of air and hauled the girl up on to the boat too. They both coughed a few times and the boat started moving as the giant in charge hadn’t noticed the upset. The girl kept breathing hard as she lay at the bottom with James sitting next to her breathing just as hard; both of them were soaked from head to toe. I couldn’t do anything but stare wide eyed at the girl trying to make sure she was ok without asking. Even with her hair wet and the darkened sky I could still see the bright blondeness of it. She was short but not as short as me but then again who is?
She sat up and leaned against the side on the boat, and then she looked at both me and James who had fallen silent. Then she had grinned. A grin so wide it was the biggest one I’ve seen second to James himself. “Let’s do that again!” She exclaimed, shaking her shoulder length hair out of her face. Before James and I could think of something to say she had already began to tell us a story of her falling into a lake on one of the times she visited her grandparents. I just looked at her as if she was crazy and she just went on talking and talking at a super fast pace, little did I know that one day it would be normal for us to talk like that for hours at a time.
“Oh yeah, I haven’t even told you my name yet! How could I be so rude? I means really, who gets in a boat, falls, then doesn’t even tell the other people in the boat their name and thanks to whoever saved them, which reminds me,” She then stops and looks at James, “Thanks for saving me,” She said with a hyper smile. Then it was the talkative girl that took over again, “Well anyway my name’s Kimi, Kimi Anderson, if you were still wondering because you know, people can get bored and what not when talking to other people,” she said staring James and I up and down as if studying us. “You guys look like trouble makers,” Kimi said, still studying us. “But that’s ok ‘cause you also look like real nice people.” I had stared at her wondering if I should have been insulted or not but I didn’t feel insulted and that was good enough for me. “You wanna be my friend?” She asked shy for the first time since she started talking. Her dark brown eyes then went wide with anticipation and she began to chew her upper lip.
I had turned to James just as he began to speak, “Sure, why not?” He shrugged, leaning on the other side of the boat with his arms behind his head. Kimi grinned and quickly turned to me making me grin as well. Nobody had ever asked me to be their friend before. I just became friends with the guys out of nowhere. It was a great feeling that I didn’t want to ever let go of. I never actually thought that someone would want to be my friend willingly but then again my mom had always told me I was a great person that everyone at school will love. I had never believed her until that moment and it brought a smile to my face remembering her saying that to me.
“Of course I want to be your friend, we can be best friends! Best friends forever!” I exclaimed still grinning.
Kimi grinned bigger at the two of us. I could feel the old Reinette coming through as I expressed my happiness. I liked to know that the little girl who would stare at the stares wishing at night was still there deep down inside. James had done a double take staring at me as if I simultaneously grew two more heads. I guessed I should have seen that one coming though. I mean think about it, you meet someone who talks only a few times and the rest is sitting quietly and smiling every once in awhile and then all of a sudden that person is outgoing and grinning like a fool from ear to ear. It’s just not practical. But then again… when have I ever been practical?
Just then I glimpsed my first view of the Hogwarts castle and it was beautiful, I couldn’t help but stare up at the mansion openmouthed and amazed. The whole castle was lit up through the windows giving off a warm welcoming glow and making it so that it stood out against the dark twinkling sky. It was absolutely huge and I felt suddenly alone in the small occupied boat. Looking back at my two new friends at that moment was like seeing the sun for the first time. I remember thinking intensely happy feelings as I repeated over and over in my head “I have friends”. From then on I vowed I would never do anything deliberate to ruin my friendship with not just Kimi and James but with Sirius, Peter, and Remus too. I wish I had kept my promise.
We had gotten out of the boat in record time as Kimi and I each grabbed one of James’s hands and rushed out faster than any of the other first year afraid of falling. All of us ran to the lit doorway excited for what waited within. Our breathing raged and hard, we finally made it to the warm interior of the castle and had been the only first years to get inside so fast. With my hands on my knees by the entrance to the castle, I had looked around as if it would be the last time I would see anything so beautiful. The doors to the right or me themselves were a piece of art as they were a stunning oak wood and I had guessed they were the double doors to the great hall as the sound coming from within was record breaking.
Beside me I had heard deep breathing and looking over I realized James was standing up right with his back rigid. He seemed to be taking deep breathes through his nose trying to get a hold of himself. His chest moved up and down and his eyes locked on the other side of the room but he saw nothing. On my other side of me I heard nothing, but turning toward kimi I realized she was just as amazed as I was, looking everywhere and nowhere at the same time, her blonde hair wiping her face as she moved her head back and forth as if trying to see if a dream were reality. Her bright blue eyes were wide with excitement and the grin that never ceased seemed to had doubled in size upon entering.
Once the three of us gained composure we began looking for some indicator as to what to do next. At that point we were still the only ones in the Entrance Hall and had no clue as to what we were supposed to be doing. James who had seemed to know all the answers had been floored as well and we all stood their looking and feeling like fools for a few more seconds until a stiff backed women had came briskly from a small chamber off to the side of the hall.
The women wore a high pointed black hat where her hair lay tied up in a perfect bun underneath. Her robes were all black and went all the way up to her neck and she was holding a long wand that seemed to place nicely in her long fingers. Her large cat like eyes had scanned the hall and rested on the three of us staring at her with curious expressions.
“Your early for first years but no matter, please follow me,” She prompted as if reading from a text book. We followed her without a word to the room from where she came from. Once inside she turned on her heal staring at us, “Now wait here while I go direct the other first years.” Without another word she speed walked out of the room to wait for the first years who were on time.
Too scared to talk we just stayed quiet and waited for our remaining classmates to catch up. Once the mysterious women brought them in she stood at the end of the room by the door leading back to the Entrance hall. James and I regrouped with the rest of our train compartment bringing Kimi along. I remember being insanely nervous and anxious looking around at the rest of the eleven year olds. Most of them had had a blank look on their face and were taking deep breaths like James had. Others shook uncontrollably like Peter and a girl with bright red hair. Some of them even looked relaxed, as if they had started a new school before and Hogwarts compared to that was merely boring.
The women by then had started talking and even though I knew I needed to pay attention I had still been stuck in my own world. I thought about what going to Hogwarts would have meant to my dad and my muggle mom especially. What would have been the encouraging word every child gets on a first day of school? Would I have been able to handle leaving them by then if they had been alive? I didn’t know any of the answers to my internal questionnaire and for that I had missed the worst speech to ever miss in a Hogwarts career.
Sirius had nudged me in the ribs to get my attention and after hitting him back I had realized we were all being shoved into two lines and getting ready to get sorted. By then I had briefly remembered James’s description or the sorting and was instantly nervous of the hat putting me in the wrong house. I had wondered what it would be like being in the wrong house and what it would be like not even fitting in any of the four homes. To put it simply, I was one of the kids shaking uncontrollably and not one of the pureblooded bored looking ones. Sirius had looked much more nervous than me and though he didn’t show it I could tell by the way the small crease in his eyebrows wouldn’t go away.
The two lines lead by the woman whose name I had still didn’t know marched through the Entrance Hall and walked through the double doors to the Great hall full of older more experienced students and their teachers. Everything had looked so new and wonderful I had forgotten to be nervous and had just looked around completely carefree, something not many of the first years were doing. Even Kimi looked about to pee her pants with fright and even though I had just met her I was still shocked by her eyes wide with nerves and worries.
The room was split into five tables one for every house and one for the teachers table facing all of the rest. The people at the two tables we walked in-between to get to the front were giving up encouraging smiles their eyes holding the same kind encouragement a parent would give a child. I had felt oddly at ease by the smiles from the older students in blue and even more from the ones in yellow and had gained enough confidence to get the sorting over with by the time the front of the lines had reached an old hat much like the one the no-name woman wore. The hat was a dirty brown color and had many patches covering it. Once the talking in the hall had ceased to exist the hat had opened from the side facing the front and started to sing. The hat sung of all the different kinds of qualities needed to be in each house and honestly I could pick out all the qualities as at least a little bit of me.
The first first year to be sorted was named Alay, Annie and she shook the entire way to the stool where she sat and waited. Not even a few seconds into being sorted she squealed and jumped at the same time causing the teachers to smile at the memory of their own sorting and the older students to chuckle at the stupidity of the child for not knowing that the sorting hat could talk. Suddenly the hat had opened up again and screamed louder than the girl herself, what house she was to be in for the next 7 years of her life, “Gryffindor!” The girl stumbled from the stool and nearly fell walking quickly to the cheering table at the far left of the hall.
The next person that was sorted was none other than Anderson, Kimberly. Kimi’s eyes had grown to the size of plates when she heard her full name and stumbled in the same fashion of Annie up to the talking hat. Once the hat touched her head and everything was quiet for a few moments the hat seemed like its decision was made up when it opened its mouth once more to scream out “Gryffindor!” Kim bounced from her seat still having the hat on her head. The women took the hat off and placed it back on the stool for the next victim.
More people with the last name starting with an A were sorted and the sorting moved on to the B’s and Sirius just kept getting more and more scared to the point where he couldn’t stop shaking and his forehead had beads of sweat on them. His skin was pale and his mouth was opened a crack. His eyes had been glued to the floor as if he was trying and failing at avoiding the gaze of an unwanted guest. “Black, Sirius,” the women had called and instantly Sirius’s head had snapped up but instead of looking at the hat or the women he looked at the one and only James Potter. James had looked so shocked it would have been hilarious if he hadn’t glared a few seconds later. Sirius looked crestfallen and paled even more as he looked away and began walking up to the stool and more importantly the hat on the stool. Many people in the hall began to whisper to their friends once hearing Sirius’s last name called.
I heard lots of “Oh no!”’S and “Ugh, not another one!"’S and “Heaven knows we already have enough pure blood maniacs!”’S and variations of the three. But Sirius held his head high. He had sat down with grace and dignity and had silently conversed with the hat for a good five minutes before the hat called out something nobody in the hall expected but me, “Gryffindor!” Upon hearing the brave man’s name Sirius had grinned a grin bigger than any of the few I had seen and walked slowly to the Gryffindor table as if to make a statement on how slow one can walk in awkward silences. Nobody in the hall had left out a breath since the hat spook last and at that moment I had taken upon myself to get the sorting going again as I began to clap eagerly and shouted “Yeah! You go Sirius! Show those Slytherins whose boss!” After that the Gryffindors need no more telling and began to shout out similar things to the glaring table on the other side of the hall. Sirius had shot me an appreciative smile and I smiled back happy to help.
The sorting after that was nothing special. The scared red head was sorted into Gryffindor, along with James, Peter, and Remus. Once the sorting got to the R’s I was already calm and ready to be sorted more than the first couple of people sorted were. “Reed, Reinette,” I had inwardly cringed when hearing my first name and made my way through the remaining first years and to the hat. Suddenly the hat had seemed much more big and scary than it had on any of my friend’s heads.
The hat was so big that once it touched my head it had slouched down over my eyes and all I could see was blackness. “You have a strange mind,” a voice had mused from inside the hat. It had taken a few seconds before I realized that the voice wasn’t in the hat, it was the hat. “You’re not a smart one, that’s for sure,” “Gee, thanks,” I had thought back angrily. “You’re not book smart but your street smart and that’s important to be I suppose…” He had said completely ignoring my thought. “Not Ravenclaw, you wouldn’t even be able to get into the common room,” He had chuckled at his own private joke that I had not gotten and had felt completely lost. “Are you going to sort me or are you just going to insult me with things I don’t understand yet?” I spat. If there is anything that bugs me the most, it would be cheap shots. My grandma was the queen of them and still is. “Well well well, don’t we have an attitude? I think Hufflepuffs are too nice for you…” “You mean there too much of a pushover for me to be in their house?” I had said. By that moment in my Hogwarts life I had understood that Hufflepuffs were the least respected house. James had told me they were loyal and nice but were still made fun of and had the reputation of being a pushover. “Your mother had your sense or humor, maybe you should go to Slytherin like her…”
At the hats last musing I had completely lost it. “What the hell are you to talk about my mother in that way? She’s a muggle for one and she was too nice to be a Slytherin even if she was a witch!” I was livid and considered just ripping the hat to pieces right there without even being sorted. “You may know less about your past than you know, young Reinette.” The hat had said softly. I didn’t know what to do and as I was about to ask what he had meant he opened up his mouth and yelled out, “Gryffindor!” And with that the strict no-name women took the hat and nudged me toward my new table. I felt numb as I walked over to the table but had to smile at all my friends who had miraculously all made it into the same house.
I sat down in between Kimi and Sirius with James on the other side of Sirius and Remus and Peter sitting opposite us. The other Gryffindor first years were not too far from us but sat with their heads together giggling about something I had not heard. All around us upperclassmen chatted about their summers and of the new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher. Once nobody paid me any attention I focused my attention to the room instead. It had seemed to me that Hogwarts was beautiful everywhere and the Great Hall hadn’t disappointed. The ceiling had the twinkling stars spread across the entire length with the almost full moon suspended above the Hufflepuff table. When I looked closer I saw the real ceiling above the night’s sky which had a cathedral look to it. Candle flouted throughout the whole hall as if hung by invisible strings and I vaguely wondered if they were the only light source.
A boy who looked to be a sixth or seventh year saw me looking and pointed to the sky, “Once when I was a first year there was a terrible thunder storm,” He started in a low voice from across the table. My head snapped down with a confused expression looking at him as to say go on. “Well, you see that ceiling portrays exactly what the sky looks like outside, and not only that,” He took a dramatic pause and went on a few seconds later, “It acts like the real sky too! So when the thunder storm came the whole hall flooded and even a few students droned! We couldn’t go into the school for weeks because the room had to dry up on its own,” He looked quite proud of himself once he saw the nervous glances Peter had given the ceiling.
A girl that looked to be one of his smarter friends snorted into her pumpkin juice once she heard what he was saying. “You shouldn’t be scaring the poor first years Colin! You’re head boy for goodness sake!” She scolded him while pointing her finger at his face menacingly. She then turned to the terrified Peter, “Don’t worry, that never happened and won’t ever happen. The ceiling isn’t able to start raining,” She said kindly and seeing Peter relax all of a sudden turned fierce and glared at Colin menacingly. “Honestly-how could you do something so stupid? If I wasn’t here these first years would have gone weeks terrified of the ceiling! The ceiling! As if they already don’t have enough to be scared of! And your head boy-and in front of the head girl now that I think about it! You need to shape up mister or I’m going straight to Professor Dumbledore and making him take away your head status! Don’t test me Colin-I’m totally serious!” Colin’s face had grown redder with ever word so that when she had finished her rant he looked like a giant tomato.
“You can’t be serious! It was only a little joke! No harm done!” He complained with a strong Irish accent.
“I’ve never been seriouser!” She exclaimed still glaring. They glared at each other for a few seconds more before they started laughing. All of us had been extremely confused as to why they just started laughing in the middle of an argument. Once the girl got her posture back she saw how confused we looked.
Her eyes shifted over to Sirius and she suddenly grinned and tried not to laugh anymore. “Sorry, it’s just, well your name is Sirius and I said I was serious and Colin said I wasn’t,” Her voice shook towards the end where she couldn’t help it and started a new round of extreme laughter alone with Colin who almost fell off his seat.
Finally getting the joke I started to laugh alone with them causing more people to stare at us like we were crazy. Soon after the rest of them got the joke but decided it wasn’t funny enough to laugh. Once the three of us had composed our selves the girl introduced herself and Colin. Her name was Emmeline Vance and his was Colin O’Callaghan, head boy and girl, both in Gryffindor. Their best friends and had been since first year and can never be mad at each other for more than 10 seconds.
For the rest of the feast Colin and Emmeline explained how Hogwarts worked and who the best and worst teachers are. When the feast ended Colin showed us to the Gryffindor common room while Emmeline helped the other first years. The password was “Honey Nut” for unknown reasons and we were the only ones there thanks to Colin’s ingenious shortcut and we went straight to bed, Kimi and I to the left door and the rest of them to the right door, saying goodnights on the way. Kimi and I shuffled our feet up the winding stair case until we got to the last landing which had a small metal plaque nailed into the wooden door which read “First Years” on it in a cursive golden font. Kimi pushed open the door revealing a descent sized circular room.
To me the room had been the biggest bed room I’ve had since I was 8 but to Kimi who I had quickly learned grew up in a wealthy home the room was smaller than hers, but she wasn’t complaining. My second hand trunk was at the end of the furthest bed on the left side across from Kimi’s. We had started jumping on the beds for reasons I can’t remember when our other two roommates came in as slow as we had. They had stopped short when they saw us and the red head looked as if she was going to tell us off.
She settled for just ignoring us and walked over to her own bed next to mine to sit down. The other girl did the same with the last bed and instantly fell asleep. I stopped jumping and plopped down awkwardly on my own bed; Kimi did the same and walked over to my bed to sit next to me. The whole room became awkward as we all stared at each other not sure of what to say or do.
Finally the red head seemed to think of something and began in a quiet voice as to not wake the other girl. “My names Lily Evans and the sleeping one is Annie Alay. What are your names?” She asked sweetly with a smile. At that time I was half asleep and not paying attention so don’t go thinking I was a complete nutter.
“Hi Annie, I’m Kimi and that’s Nettie-or something like that…” I had said drowsily with my eyes half closed. I had vaguely heard Kimi snickering and Lily scoff as if insulted. It’s not my fault I didn’t remember her name five seconds after she told me, because I did remember it! I swear! I just mixed up the two names and mine and Kimi’s names, not that she knew that at the time.
“My names Lily, Kimi,” she told me as if talking to a five year old. Her green eyes had been slightly narrowed but still held kindness and a second chance. Well, I totally failed that second chance with what I said next.
“Shush Annie, Lily’s sleeping. You’re going to wake her up if you don’t be quieter!” I said loudly. Annie remained sleeping even with Kimi’s snorts though. Lily looked as if she was going to hit me and her face was so red it matched her hair.
“MY NAME IS LILY FOR PETE’S SAKE!” She roared whisper style, still thinking of Annie. Still not thinking right I had become extremely confused by her last statement. I swear, you would have been to. It’s not just me!
“Wait, what does Peter have anything to do with this? He’s in the boy’s dormitory…unless…wait, Annie have you snuck Peter into our room? Peter, come out now! I know you’re in here!” I said still quiet and practically sleeping. I blame the food. I wouldn’t put it past Dumbledore to but some sleeping potion in the chicken. Stupid chicken ruined any possible friendship with a normal person!
By then Lily was fuming, “Kimi, Peter isn’t in here!” She exclaimed, throwing her arms in the air with frustration. “And he never was!” She added when I opened my mouth to contradict her.
“Well then why is it for his sake then? And my name isn’t Kimi, hers is,” I said jerking my thumb in the direction of the real Kimi.
Lily through herself into her pillow, her frustrated yells muffled. She then lifted her hand and yanked the hangings shut. And that ladies and gentlemen is the very reason why Lily Evans hates me so much.
“What’s with her?” I asked innocently completely flabbergasted. Kimi snorted again and shook her head already walking back to her bed now that her entertainment had ended. By the time she had gotten to her bed I was already asleep, still in my uniform and utterly exhausted.
A/N: Sorry that it's so short, the next one is longer. Hope you like it and as always please review!
Disclaimer: I Do not own anything you may recognize, JK Rowling does. :D
CHAPTER 5: …A Marauder
June, 1972-Second Year
Over the years Sirius, Kimi, James, Peter, Remus, and I became great friends. There wasn’t anything that could have changed that fact and everyone in the whole school knows it. We even picked up a nifty group name. I didn’t want to at first because really, who does that? But it was Kimi’s idea and there was no stopping her once her mind was set. When we split up the group they stuck with the name.
So from about the middle of our first year and to the beginning of our forth year the six of us were known as The Marauders. Most of the school didn’t even know who we were that first year but with every prank and every crazy act we slowly but surely became recognizable. The first time people really started to call us by group name and admired us was the end of the year extravaganza as we like to call it.
The whole prank started with James wanting to be on the quidditch team for second year. You see, in the beginning of first year when James went to the tryouts all of the upperclassmen laughed and called him cute for thinking he could make it. The captain didn’t even give him a chance to show them how good he was, he just shooed him off to the castle. After that James started to practice almost every day and was probably even better than some of the people who got on the team. He went to all the games, memorizing the techniques and plays, and applied his findings to his own invented game plans. By the end of that year he was officially quidditch crazed and annoying the hell out of all of us. That was when we devised the Get James on the Quidditch Team So He Won’t Annoy Us Next Year mission. The GJQTSHWAUNY for short. The mission was quite simple really and by then we had some magical experience and unlike our first couple of pranks this one went smoothly and without much research.
First we were all to go to dinner as planned but about half way through James and Sirius went out of the hall for the next step. The two of them leaving was a signal for Remus who sat by the front of the table close to the teachers. He sat next to the sixth year quidditch team captain Jeremy Wood where he had not spoken to him the entire dinner and was to be inconspicuous. Kimi who sat by the front also was to be attracting attention the whole dinner as to make James’s entrance more noticed later on. Peter and I sat in the middle of the table like we usually did but underneath the table in our hands were the ingenious fireworks the six of us had perfected earlier that week. Once everyone in the hall was almost done with their dinner James’s entrance came. I saw him outside the window and started to sing Jingle Bells really loud. The song was a signal to Kimi who got ready to point out James when he reached the door to the Great hall and also signaled to Remus to get ready for his job.
I had only gotten to the second verse of the song when a loud BOOM opened the door of the hall in one big flourish courteous of Sirius’s wand. Kimi quickly jumped up onto the table and screamed as loud as she could, “LOOK IT’S JAMES POTTER! FLYING!” Everyone looked to where she pointed and suddenly James came zooming through the opened doors in a jet of light. People started pointing him out to their too slow friends and others began cheering. The Slytherin table remained quiet with disgust on their faces which would soon be changed to outrage when Peter and I lit the fireworks. Most of the fireworks zoomed up and down the hall and became hoops and giant dragons and hippogriffs for James to maneuver and show off with. But a couple fireworks were designed especially to fuel the ever growing house rivalry. The golden and red ones turned into different quidditch balls and flew over to the Slytherin table from across the hall. They began to zoom all around the panicking Slytherins and every few minutes one of the balls would explode into a pile of rotten fish splattering onto the heads of the unlucky Slytherins below it.
While that was all going on Remus on the other side of the hall had already started his part. Once James had started to flip and turn and all out show everything he ever learned to do on a broomstick Remus had started sweet talking Jeremy while putting in a few suggestions for the team. “You know, that Potter guy is a really good player. I mean look at him, is that a dragon he just dogged? You’ve done a great job with the team! They wouldn’t have had a chance without you as captain! Maybe you should keep an eye out for this guy for tryouts next year,” Remus said in an indifferent voice while Jeremy kept his eyes on James in the air.
“I don’t know…what is he? A first year? Second year? That’s rather young to be on the team… But his form is good and I can see some definite potential in him,” Jeremy scrutinized still following James with his eyes. He seemed to not really notice that Remus was the one talking but listened to him all the same.
Remus had begun to panic. The plan was to make Jeremy consider him for the team not just say he had potential. “Did I mention your James’s hero?” He asked hoping that his feeble attempt would seal the deal.
“No, no you hadn’t. That boys got great taste, I’ll tell you that. Well if I mean that much to him, I guess I could keep a spot for him next year…He is a rather good flyer.” He said with a smile. We had done some research on him and Emmeline told me that Jeremy had a huge ego. Good thing to or else our plan probably wouldn’t have worked. Remus had grinned and shot a small blue spark into the air with his wand. Sirius had been standing by the door waiting to see if it worked and upon seeing the blue spark immediately shot his wand in the air to finish off the GJQTSHWAUNY mission. He said the spell that the six of us spent months developing and the sky was filled with “The Marauders,” in a bolded golden font. Sirius quickly said a lettering spell and underneath the previous spell the sky now read “Are Now Officially Quidditch Certified.” The Gryffindors cheered at the now sparkling sky and at the smelling Slytherin table covered in old fish parts.
Thus starting a more official Marauder legacy.
Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns everything so don't be hatin'.
A/N: This chapter used to be more epic but i got away from the story and began to write more about Wulfric which was not the point haha. The present was so close so i just put the last two chapters of the past as one :D Enjoy!
CHAPTER 6: …A Monster
October, 1973, Third Year
After the GJQTSHWAUNY the people of Hogwarts noticed us more and watched out for when we became unusually quiet, because it just wasn’t right for all of us to be silent at the same time for more than ten minutes. When we were quiet, we were also planning something. And when we were planning something, someone was targeted. Usually the Slytherin gang as we like to call them, namely, Evan Rosier, Gareth Avery, Sundara Sullivan, Rodolphus Lestrange, and last but not least Severus Snape.
This is why in October of third year did everyone in Hogwarts become wary of us and our sad exterior. All except one person. That one person was the one and only Remus Lupin. Remus was oblivious to our behavior and didn’t understand why people had stared at us funny when we passed by in the halls. All five of us knew something was wrong with Remus and yet nobody knew what exactly was wrong with him or his supposed sick aunt. And that made us feel betrayed because whatever was wrong with him, we apparently weren’t good enough to know what it was. Every time Remus came up with a new excuse he got really twitchy which really gave the lie away. I think I was the only one who really noticed how nervous he would get for most of our first and second years. Then the others started to see what I saw close to the end of the year and even more when we weren’t allowed to see Remus during the summer.
During the summer I leant on my friends shoulders to keep me sane. I didn’t live particularly close to anyone but I saw Sirius and Kimi a lot since they were closest. The others I would see at Diagon Alley when we desired to get out of the house for a day. But Remus could never come claiming to be with his sick aunt all the time.
After that summer all of us got really suspicious. First of all, what was his aunt even sick with? Why did he always have to go see her conveniently every month? And if his aunt was the sick one, why did he always look sick himself before and after a visit? The five of us were confused and wanted answers, and we were going to get them one way or another.
After dinner one night I couldn’t take it anymore. Remus wasn’t in classes that day for unknown reasons and I didn’t pay attention in any of my classes, not that it mattered with my top student status. Dinner had been very quiet in our little group and I barely ate too. I just thought all through it thinking about Remus’s secret and what could possibly be that important to not tell his five best friends. Suddenly I had gotten a pretty spectacular epiphany and rushed off to the library as fast as I could. “That’s it! I need to go, I’ll see you guys later!” I had yelled already half way to the door.
“Where are you going? Nettie!” James had yelled after me after he too left his thoughts.
I ran all the way to the library not caring that I left my bag somewhere on the third floor. Once I got there, I realized nobody was in there as everyone was at dinner. Not caring I walked over to the books and started searching for anything that had to do with being sick once a month. If there was anything I did know about Remus’s secret it was those two things.
My searching wasn’t going as well as I thought it would and I finally realized how ridiculous my search was. How was I going to find books specifically for being sick once a month?
It was hopeless.
I finally just gotten frustrated and grabbed a pile of books from the nearest the shelf and slammed at least 5 of them on the side table. I slumped into the chair and put my head in my hands with my elbows on the table. I screamed my frustrations still in that position and started kicking the legs of the table and began to speak quietly to myself, “How could I be so stupid! There could be a million things wrong with him-but do any of us know where to even start? Of course not! He won’t tell us anything and will never tell us anything!” I kicked the leg harder this time and fell silent, the air thick with grief. “Am I a bad friend?” I whispered to the empty room, my voice almost echoing. “Should I know by now, should I have been able to arrange the pieces and know by now? Or am I being a bad friend purely by searching for the answers opposed to just asking him…? I’m hurting him- he obviously doesn’t want anyone to know. His best friends. How could I be such a hypocrite? It’s not like I’ve told anyone of my past, and isn’t that the same thing?” I sighed and lifted my heavy eyes from the table ashamed, my hands still attached to them. My eyes reluctantly glanced over to the other side of the table where my messy pile of books lay. I stood up to put them back on their respective shelves when the cover of one of the books caught my eye.
It was a picture of a full moon and tiny stars surrounding it. Underneath the moon was a grassy hill where the moon light lit up the most graceful wolf I had ever seen. The wolf had light brown thick hair and had its snout pointed up at the moon yet he was not howling, just watching.
The cover was a painting with the title sprawled across the sky of it in thick black ink almost matching the black of the paint, A Werewolf’s Tail. Next to the painted wolf was a name written in the same black ink, Wulfric Vovkulak. Inside the book was handwritten in a journal style by who I had guessed was Wulfric Vovkulak. Quickly I flipped to the last page and read at the top, March 10, 1954. I closed the book and look down at it trying to decide whether I should take it and read it or put it back on the shelf I did for the rest of the books. The thing is, I never really knew much about werewolves but everything I’ve heard has to do with violence and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to read a firsthand journal about it. The book didn’t even look like it was library approved but rather someone just stuck it in the shelf without anybody noticing. There was however a summary of sorts on the back cover. It was written in the same ink as the title and author but unlike the cover the back had no painting or anything on it for that matter. Just a worn out black with a fresher, brighter black ink on it.
Hello, I am Wulfric Vovkulak. This book, this very book placed in your hands is my life. I had written in these very pages every night from first year and now that I am in seventh year I feel I no longer need the comfort it has brought. In case you have not noticed, I am also a werewolf and although you probably grew up to hate me I am truly a good person with a big heart. Be careful with my journal please as it is very important to me.
The signing was done on the wrong side of the letter and it took a few moments to realize a drawing of a shooting star that took up the space where the letter would have ended normally. All together the book looked to be as old as the date infers and truly worn down. The binding was coming off of it and the ink was hard to read, the painting was wonderfully done and looked to be worn out also. The shooting star on the back was not just stunning but also didn’t look at all worn out and I couldn’t believe I hadn’t noticed it before.
I wanted to read it.
This Wulfric Vovkulak had me hooked and I soon found myself walking to my dormitory with the book under my arm grabbing my bag on the way. I still hadn’t forgotten about Remus but I had come to an understanding that when he wants to tell us he will and I shouldn’t push him or investigate what I shouldn’t, even if I was insanely curious.
When I got to the common room mostly every Gryffindor was in there studying, doing homework, or just relaxing from a hard day of classes. I had raced through the noisy crowd with the book clutched to my side to get to the second year dormitory and didn’t even stop to look for my friends. When I got to the door I pushed it open and lay on my bed. Jenkins was cuddled up in the covers at the end of the bed and didn’t even notice my presence. Then I started to read Wulfric Vovkulak’s journal, starting from his first day of his first year all the way to almost the end of seventh year. The end of the journal ended with an “I’ll write more tomorrow” but the page after that was a goodbye note which doesn’t explain what happened. Wulfric had a very hard life with not only being a werewolf but also having no family and living in an orphanage most of his life.
When he was bitten he was 11 years old and decided to go into the Forbidden Forest when he couldn’t sleep one night. In the Journal it doesn’t say if he ever found out who bit him but I hope he found out. Most of the Journal was everyday unimportant things and just being a kid in Slytherin house. Yep, Slytherin house. He was one of the biggest bullies at the time and everyone feared him and his friends. Him and his friends hexed their classmates regularly and didn’t feel sorry or anything. When he became a werewolf the headmaster before Dumbledore would just tie him up in the forest with unbreakable robe. He wrote in great detail exactly how he transformed and what it felt like. I couldn’t accept that! It was dreadful to hear of a poor boy being tied up, werewolf or not.
It was horrible. It was like I wasn’t reading about it anymore but feeling it myself. Feeling the hairs grow and your bones change shape in a few seconds. The feeling of every single cell being ripped apart and becoming almost unrecognizable to the best scientist out there.
He lost his memory those nights when the full moon was out and the last thing he would remember was the pain as if he would die every month than comeback to life in the morning. After the first couple of months he became almost completely silent in classes and even with his friends. The teachers started to get worried that he would break any minute and Wulfric noticed this and felt like a bomb about to explode all the time. He didn’t have anyone to talk to since his friends didn’t know and he couldn’t tell them in fear of what they would do to him. In his fourth year he started to paint to get his mind off of things and got really good at it. That’s when he painted the cover and the star at the back. Apparently the star was like the key to open the book. If you were trusted the star would appear and you would be able to read it. I was confused about this because how could a book know if I’m trustworthy or not? Regardless I read on, day after day of his life. Then one day something terrible happened.
His bully friends had decided that enough was enough and followed him out to the forest were they watched him tie himself to a tree and sit silent. It didn’t take long for them to figure it out and run to the castle screaming, terrified for their lives. If you ask me they happen to be the worst friends ever, I for one wouldn’t be that horrible to a friend or ever dream of ruining his life by telling the whole school. That’s right. The whole school.
After that everyone knew what Wulfric was and wouldn’t go near him. Even his friends were afraid of him as well as all the teachers. Except one. Professor Dumbledore. He talked to Wulfric every night for months and worked with him to control his transformations more. It was sort of like a therapy for werewolves and helped him a lot.
CHAPTER 7: …Accepted
When I reached the end of the journal I started to cry. Crying is a big deal for me and I hadn’t cried since my parents died. I had reached my hand up and gently touched the wetness on my cheek that I didn’t know I still made. It somehow made me happy to be reminded of how vulnerable I am.
Opening the hangings I realized that it was very late at night and all my roommates were sleeping in their respected beds snoring lightly. I glanced at the window and instantly began to cry softly again. The stars were shinning as they always did but there was one thing about that night’s sky that really stood out to me. It was a full moon and I knew what Remus was. One of my best friends was going through what Wulfric had and it made me intensely sad to know that somewhere Remus was feeling as if he was dead and in the morning he will wake up and feel like the monster he thinks he is. I couldn’t let him do that by himself. I wanted to be with him when he did wake up. To tell him that he was a great person. That he didn’t deserve any of that.
Still crying I ran out of the room and down the stairs to the common room. Once there I ran up the boy’s dormitory until I found the plaque that said “The Strictly Male Population of the Marauders.” My heart was beating ten times the normal pace as I stormed through the door without knocking and looking like a complete maniac.
“Get up right now!” I didn’t know why I was panicking so much but the panic was almost tangible in my voice. The boys all jumped up out of their beds as if electrocuted when they too heard the panic.
“What’s wrong? What happened?” Sirius was the first to spot me on the floor where I had collapsed after slamming the door shut and yelling. I quickly cast a silent spell on the room and looked up at him with my tear filled eyes and panting parted mouth. My hair was messy and in some parts stuck to my forehead with cold sweat and I still wore my uniform from class earlier that day.
Sirius rushed out of bed and sitting down next to me engulfed me in a hug. Sirius and I before that night never hugged each other because we didn’t have to. We never showed any fear or sadness for more than ten seconds at a time so we never had to comfort one another. But the funny thing is, we both knew how much we needed the comfort. We were more alike than any of our other friends yet we never acknowledged it since we didn’t want to.
Hugging and crying both made us feel weak but that hug that he gave me when I finally showed my fear and my sadness was nice.
James and Peter were both frozen in their beds as they watched Sirius willingly hug me and me crying on his shoulder hugging him back weakly. We stayed there for more that fifteen minutes all the while me thinking about Remus until I realized the three of them still didn’t know why I was crying. “Remus,” I hiccupped as I pulled away trying to get a grip of myself. “He’s a,” I started to cry some more but when Sirius tried to hug me again I stood up and started again stronger this time. “Remus is a werewolf,” I spook strong and watery from the sobbing. It didn’t sound like me at all. My eyes were red and puffy but I held my head high as I waited for the three of them to digest the news.
“What? But-he-no, he can’t-I mean-how?” James spluttered as he was the first to recover.
“Look outside-at the moon,” my voice broke at the end but I was determined to be strong, especially after my breakdown. “He’s never here when there’s a full moon and he’s sick before and after he goes away. I read a book that showed me symptoms and everything. I’m telling you, Remus is defiantly a werewolf. And there’s nothing we can do to change that,” As I explained the full capacity of this came crushing down at me. We were still his friends and will not leave him. “We have to tell him we know,” I finished my thoughts out loud. The boys looked at me and one by one the comprehension and understanding dawned onto their faces and sadness replaced the confusion. “Do you guys mind if I tell him instead of all of us?”
Peter looked back at me then at the full moon visible from the window then back at me, “Since you found out in the first place I think you should have the honor to tell him, but make sure he knows that I don’t think anything bad of him. And these guys don’t either, right?” He asked as he looked between James and Sirius who took up looking at the floor below each of their feet.
James spook first still looking at the floor, “Of course,” He said and I knew he meant it. He was just thinking. James grew up being told stories about werewolves opposed from me. He was taught that they were dangerous to be around and although some may be good people there are no good werewolves when the full moon takes over.
Sirius looked up and looked Peter full on in the face when it was his turn to speak. “Remus will always be one of my best friends and I think I speak for all of us when I say that he will always be the Remus we all know and love even with his furry little problem,” Sirius smiled and I nodded fully agreeing with him. James looked over and smiled slightly and Peter gazed at all of us affectionately like a mother of a child who got straight O’s on their NEWTS.
I feel asleep last that night in Sirius’s bed cuddled up next to him and I was the first one up in the morning. I looked at my position and looked at Sirius’s messy hair and peaceful expression. He looked so carefree and it was flabbergasting to realize upon seeing his sleeping form for the first time that they were the same person, just different mindsets.
Everything from the night before had come rushing back to me and I had the sudden urge to throw up but contained it at the last minute. Carefully I pulled the covers from over me and moved slowly out of the warm bed careful to not wake Sirius up from his slumber. Looking around the room I realized that Remus still wasn’t back but figured he was in the castle somewhere.
I walked down the stairs slowly as to not wake up anyone. It was still early in the morning and since it was a Saturday most people were sleeping in. The common room was silent and I was about to leave the room but a small movement caught my eye.
There on the couch staring into the fire was the very person I had been looking for. Remus sat with his back slumped and even from the back view it was obvious how sad he was. I walked over to him cautiously, not because of his secret but because I didn’t want to startle him. I sat down on the floor right in front of him with my legs folded underneath so that our faces were inches away from each other. His eyes were closed and calm as if he was sleeping yet the small crease in between his eyebrows said differently. Cuts littered his face and he was even paler than normal. My heart ached for him and I couldn’t contain myself any longer, I lunged on him and hugged him tightly with him panicking. I let go and sat at my original position as he stared at me surprised. He looked as if he remembered something and started to panic some more as he tried to think of an excuse for the many cuts.
I looked into his eyes and said calmly, “I don’t mind. I wouldn’t mind if you were a three headed pink elephant that had to wear ugly glasses. You’re still the Remus I’ve always known and always will be one of my best friends. You being a werewolf won’t ever change that fact,” His eyes widened and he took two deep breaths still looking me in the eye.
“How did you find out?” He whispered desperately.
“I read a book and I just sort of connected everything. The book was great! It was the journal of a werewolf in Hogwarts who wrote what happened every day in his journal,” I licked my lips trying to decide weather I should go on or not. I decided he needed to know that what happened to Wulfric will not happen to him, “He was depressed because he didn’t have anyone who he could trust or trusted him. But that won’t happen to you because James, Sirius, Peter, Kimi, and I all know and still love you. He thought that he was a monster and had never forgiven himself for what he would do on a full moon. If you think you’re a monster than your not the Remus I know. The Remus I know is smart,” I sobbed.
He stared at me for what felt like an eternity before his eyes swayed away from my face to the fire behind me as he considered what I had said, “You really don’t think I’m a monster?”
“Of course,” I said before I tightly hugged him again, this time him hugging me back.
When the boys and Kimi woke up Remus told them he already knew they knew his secret. They understood completely as I had and life went on as if nothing had happened until a month later. Remus was acting really irritated and this time we knew the reason. It was hard for all of us to not say the wrong things to push his buttons or ignore the dark circles under his eyes. We would give people dark looks whenever they looked at Remus suspiciously and then turn his attention away so he wouldn’t notice. The five of us knew we had to do something to make Remus feel better during the full moons. Even though he said just being his friends made him feel better we couldn’t help brain storming different ways to help him. Our first idea was downright stupid and Peter’s idea which was shot down almost immediately. The first plan was turning into werewolves our selves so we could keep him company. We were staying up in the common room on the first full moon after we found out, none of us could sleep knowing what he was going through.
“That’s the stupidest idea I’ve even heard. Ever. And I’ve heard some stupid ideas,” James mumbled sleepily. It was two in the morning and Peter had just explained his epiphany from the floor where he lay sprawled across the floor while the rest of us were sitting on the couches and in my case, my special chair.
“Well I don’t hear you coming up with anything, do I?” Peter exclaimed to the ceiling. It was true though, before Peter talked all of us were silently engulfed in our own thoughts.
“Hey, I think Peter’s on to something,” Kimi started and we all stared at her with wide eyes.
Now I know Peter’s a great guy and all but sometimes he can be somewhat ignorant and a wee bit of an idiot and yes I do have permission to say those things as I was one of his best friends for how many years before being abandoned.
James was the first to recover from the momentary shock of Kimi’s words, “Kimi, are you sleep talking? ‘Cause if you aren’t I think we should take a little trip to the hospital wing now,” James mockingly said. Upon seeing Peter’s glare he quickly added, “No offence, Peter.”
“I’m not sleeping, silly. I really think he’s on to something. Listen, the point of this is to make the full moons more bearable and keeping werewolf Remus company would do that!” She through her arms up into the air as if to show her brilliance and looked at us expectantly. None of us said anything, preferring to stare at her open mouthed and confused instead. “Of course we wouldn’t turn into werewolves like him but what if there’s a way to keep him company without being in danger of being bitten? That would be great! We could keep him from hurting himself and watch out for people who would be in danger of him! Like body guards or security!” She finished with a big satisfied grin and leaned back into the couch.
“Like what though? It’s not like we’re werewolf proof,” Sirius spoke for the first time in the conversation. He sat with his eyes closed and before that we had thought he was sleeping.
We all thought of different spells and plants but I was the first to come up with something that would actually work, “Animagus,” I said simply. My voice was rough from not saying anything for so long and my eyes were locked on to the moving flames of the fire that never seemed to cease.
“Don’t people have to be born an animagus?” Peter asked confused after a short silence.
“Don’t you ever pay attention?” James muttered grumpily.
“Hey! I resent that!”
Sirius groaned and opened his eyes glaring at the two bickerers, “It’s hard to be an Animagus and will probably take a long time but werewolves can only affect them while there in their human form. I think it’s worth it. And no, wizards can become animagus even if they weren’t born one,” He finished tiredly and closed his eyes again.
“Then it’s settled, were going to become animagus,” Kimi approved nodding her head.
A week later after we did research on how to actually become animagus we told Remus of our new brilliant idea. He wasn’t happy at first because the process is dangerous but he came around to the idea once he realized how stubborn all of us were. We wanted to help Remus and gosh darn it we will help Remus!
The spell is difficult and we haven’t let learned to master it. But the animal that we will turn into had been found out even though we haven’t yet become animagus. You see, there’s this book we found in the library about a month into our research. It’s called So You Want to Be an Animagus and it was in the restricted area but we distracted Madam Prince long enough to grab it. Most of the book was directions on how to perform the spell and wand movements but the first few chapters were quizzes that helped determine which animal we would be. Peter is to be either a mouse or a rat, let’s just say he’s not so happy about that. James is supposed to be a deer or something of that nature. The result of Kimi was a type of monkey, Sirius a dog, and me a lion. We made Remus do the quiz to and his result was a wolf, which freaked us out that the book was so accurate. We’re still working on being Animagus but were getting close and soon we’ll be able to go with Remus for full moons.
Throughout that year us marauders became even bigger friends and trusted each other with everything. At least everyone except Sirius and I. We still kept to ourselves and didn’t even tell each other of each other’s past. Sure we’ve divulged certain aspects that can’t go without saying like my parents being murdered and Sirius growing up in a pure blood infested environment but never have we talked in depth of what it was really like, more like mentioning it in passing and then changing the subject right away. I didn’t tell them about being neglected and poor or stealing in Diagon Alley. Sirius’s past is different in the sense were saying his last name is like saying the lighter aspects of his life. He’s rich and got whatever he wanted as long as it fit his family’s crazy standards. But there’s more to that and even though he doesn’t tell us much we can clue together his many howlers after he does something that “disgraces the noble house of Black,” or how his eyes darken whenever someone ever mentions his family. But not once has anyone specially asked either one of us what life was like or what we were hiding, therefore we didn’t say anything preferring to accidently let something slip or simply ignore it all together. We were getting older though and sooner than later our pasts would catch up. I wasn’t ready to let that happen yet. So in the middle of Forth year when I was to willing to let everything spill something terrible happened so I turned to a regretful form of ignorance and made them forget that fateful night when they actually did find out.