You are viewing a story from harrypotterfanfiction.com View Online I am not a thief so you know. I wrote this story as Disco Alien but that account was suspended so I decided to continue it on this one as I'm not getting back onto the other one anytime soon. Anyway this story has gone in a completely different direction to how I thought it would. To my old readers, I apologise for having to put up chapters you've already read. For those who have not yet yead this story, REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!! I’m the best friend. Overlooked, overshadowed, undervalued. The homework helper, the girl advice, the listener. I help solve their problems. But when it comes to mine, it can never be the other way round. Maybe it doesn’t occur to them that I have issues too, or perhaps they aren’t bothered about my life. I highly suspect the latter option to be the correct one. You see six years of being friends with James, Remus, Sirius and Peter has taught me a valuable lesson. I’m invisible. People call me the fifth marauder. If only they knew. I love my best friends, but I hate being stuck in their shadows. That’s where I’ve been since day one. That’s all my school mates see me as. Gloria Middleton, girl that hangs around with the marauders. And I’m sick of it. I don’t want to be the girl in the background anymore. I want people to see me. I want to be visible again. I’ve spent six years being they’re lackey, now it’s time for a change. This year is for me. It’s my turn to shine. So look out Hogwarts, I’m going to be different this year. And you can bet I’m going to make heads turn. No more fifth marauder, I’m going to do this my way. So get ready, Gloria Middleton’s coming back with a bang. I walked disinterestedly into Kings Cross Station alone. My parents were busy and couldn’t see my off this year. Which suited me just fine; I don’t think I could stand for people to see me tear up at the prospect of saying goodbye. Crowds pushed past me as I strolled over to the stone barrier that would enable me to get onto platform 9 3/4. I sunk through the seemingly solid wall pulling my suitcase along behind me. I flicked my hair out of my eyes. I still wasn’t used to having it that length. The scarlet train was billowing smoke around the platform, owls hooted indignantly here and there and students proceeded to board the train. I walked past them all, searching for an empty compartment. I dumped my stuff on a luggage wrack before lying down on the grey seats. Little kids were hurrying past my half open door, screaming and yelling, caught up in the excitement. “SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I yelled sticking my head out the door. All noise and activity stopped abruptly and I withdrew back into my compartment, savouring the effect I’d had on the first years. I felt guilty of course, for shouting at them, but it was necessary if I was going to be noticed. Outside I could hear awed whispers, which makes a change, I thought wryly. At length the train started to move and I closed my eyes, dreaming of the year I was about to start. “I can’t find her!” a familiar voice shouted from the corridor. I smiled nervously. The moment I had been anticipating was about to happen. “SHHHHHHHH!” a girl’s voice said fearfully, “or else she will scream again”. I could practically see the looks of scepticism on their faces. Of course they where wondering who in the world could cause such a reaction from a first year other than them. “Who will shout again? Where is she?” an outraged voice demanded. I took a deep silent breath.Next thing I knew the door burst open and a wand was pointed at my head. “I don’t know who you think you are-”, Sirius Black stopped mid sentence and I opened an eye to stare at him, eyebrow raised. He was staring at me, looking remarkably like a goldfish. Hmmmm, I thought, I should take a picture. James, Remus and Peter charged into the room and stopped as though they’d been electrocuted. “Your hair”, James whispered disbelievingly, “it’s-” “Changed,” Remus finished faintly. Sirius let out a wail of despair. It’s true, I have changed my hair. Drastically. It used to be long, silky and quite frankly a boring brown colour. Now it’s shoulder length, layered, feathered and black with red streaks. A much better look I think. I mean since I was getting a new attitude, I thought I might as well get a new look to go with it. It kind of gets the point across a bit quicker. There was a stunned pause.Sirius was still making that horrible noise when Peter shrieked and pointed at me. “Your hairs different”. He said as though he’d made the best discovery of the 20th century. Poor Pete, he always was a bit slow. The boys and I all turned to face him. “Yes Peter”, Sirius said impatiently, “I think we’ve already realised that.” “And there I was thinking you’d grown up a bit this summer,” said James in mock disappointment. “Shut up” I said harshly. “Why do you always have to be so mean?” They turned to face me again, startled by my sudden outburst. “What’s up with you?” Sirius asked, still eyeing my hair. “Probably PMSing”, James piped up. I felt anger course through me. That was exactly what I was no longer to put up with. Before I knew it there was a resounding SMACK and I was stomping out the compartment leaving a stunned silence in my wake. A/n: REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hey guys, chapter two is here and once again I have to apologise to those who have already read this chapter on my other account but well, I'm doing the best I can. Don't forget to leave a review in the box at the bottom of this page. Oh yeah, and sorry for changing the title AGAIN but, well I had a sudden brain wave in the plot so this is much more appropriate now. Okay, enjoy ! The train pulled into Hogsmeade station and I stalked angrily over to a carriage. The thestrals huge white eyes were glowing eerily at me in the semi-darkness. I remembered how most people couldn't see them. It was only in my 4th year that I found out I could see them because I saw my grandad die. I was soon joined by two giggling girls I recognised from hufflepuff and a very disgruntled looking Lily Evans. Now Lily and I had never really bonded seeing as I was so close to James, but as I looked over at her, I saw a potential friend. The carriage suddenly jerked into life and before I had time to process what was happening we were heading towards the castle. "Hi", I said to Lily with a smile. "Hey", she replied brightly, her eyes not managing to hide her obvious curiosity at my greeting. They flickered to my hair and she smiled in approval. "I like your hair". "Thanks, I like your earrings." It was true. I did like her earrings. The silver electric guitars were dangling from her lobes. She had good taste. We continued to chat once we reached the school and I must say it was nice to be in female company after spending so much time with the boys. The hall was once again marvelously decorated and Lily invited me to sit with her. A few people stared at me as I sat down. I glanced up and down the table at the familiar faces of my house and yet they peered back with puzzled expressions. It made me realize just how much of my identity the marauders took away. If I wasn't in they're presence, nobody had a clue who I was. Perhaps they would have recognized me if I hadn't changed my hair. But then it struck me as though I'd been hit by lightening. Lily recognized me. She remembered me. I think it was in that moment that the full intensity of Lily’s character became clear to me. And probably the night we became best friends. When the marauders entered they all glanced at me with different expressions which I found both amusing, pleasing and in a way, horrifying. James was looking at me with fear and uncertainty. There was strange combination of both pride and uncertainty on Sirius’s face; Remus gazed into my eyes as though he was trying to see where the quiet girl he knew had disappeared to and Peter… well it was an expression I was not at all used to seeing directed at me from him. Admiration and gratitude were the two emotions that were plainly shown across his features for anyone to see. I must admit, seeing my best friends look at me like that threw me for a moment, but I wasn’t at all inclined to apologize for my actions unless James apologized for his unseemly comment. They sat near me and James shifted uncomfortably before addressing himself to Lily and proceeding to amaze all by actually talking to her without requesting she go out with him. Sirius leaned toward me and whispered to me in shocked tones “I knew you had it in you somewhere Gloria, six years of hanging around with us meant you had to snap sometime or other, but maybe you should talk to James. He’s very upset by what happened. He thinks your mad at him for other reasons than his little…errr…..proclamation earlier.” I blanched and snuck a look at James. He was looking visibly troubled and his eyes weren’t as bright as usual. I felt wracked with unfathomable guilt. I wanted to make people notice me, not punch holes in my relationships with my best friends. Perhaps Lily noticed his subdued air because she interrupted him roughly with a demanding “Are you alright Potter, you seem, I don’t know….upset about something.” James glanced at me for a fraction of a second, the candlelight making his pale skin glow and I saw the worry in his eyes. But the moment passed and he flashed a smile at Lily before continuing they’re conversation about quidditch as though nothing had happened. The evening passed and we walked up to the Gryffindor dormitories. I sank into a plush red arm chair and picked at a hole in it, pulling bits of fluff out and scattering it on the floor as I stared into the fire. The flames flickered oddly before me as I felt my eyes droop. James looked over at me and then announced that he was going to bed. That woke me up a bit. “Wait!” He turned round with an apprehensive look on his face as I ran up to him. “I’m sorry.” “For what?” “For slapping you of course!” I said incredulously. James laughed. “I probably deserved it though, didn’t I?” He asked. I hesitated. “I take that as a yes,” he said with a chuckle. Suddenly he ruffled my hair and I shrieked indignantly. “Hey!” James stopped laughing as I threw him a glare while trying to sort my hair out. “You’ve changed Gloria.” “God, are you still going on about my hair? I mean I knew you guys were thick but-” James winked at me and walked away, leaving my question unanswered and a strange feeling in my heart. I had made a new friend but I knew if I wasn’t careful, I could end up loosing an old one. A/n: Did you like? If so leave a review today and save a neglected author from deep depression! I know that my start to this year has been rocky. That if I get too out of hand I could loose everything. My grades, my friends, my identity, my future. I know this yet somehow, giving the boys that wake up call wasn’t enough. There’s this hunger within me, this craving to be seen. My house is beginning to see me and I thought by now this thirst for visibility would have been satisfied. But it hasn’t. It won’t go away and I’m scared that I’m going to do something stupid. Something I’ll regret. Something I won’t be able to stop myself from doing. I’ve got so much bottled up inside me, I’m scared I’m going to ruin what little time I have left. And I can’t stop. I walked with Sirius and Lily to transfiguration, people passed by me, occasionally giving me a quizzical glance. It didn’t surprise me that students still didn’t really notice me. The first years were still slightly scared of me, news of my outburst had spread among them like wildfire and now they all fell silent whenever I walked passed. Well, most of them did. The bell had not yet rung and my class were huddled around the door, chatting noisily. I waited next to lily as Sirius went to flirt with a six year Ravenclaw who sauntered past. A shrill ringing sped through the halls signalling the start of the lesson. “Sit with me?” Lily asked, pointing to the vacant seat beside her. “Sure,” I said, smiling. James and Sirius sat at the back of course. Remus and Peter however seated themselves on my other side. Professor McGonagall entered the classroom, peered sternly at us over her spectacles and started calling the register. “Chloe Allen” A tall gangly looking girl with frizzy brown hair and braces replied with a quiet, “Yes miss.” “Sirius Black” “Hey Minnie!” (McGonagall’s eye twitched dangerously but she said nothing.) The names went on and Lily answered respectively when hers was called. “Stephanie Farmer.” Another frizzy haired girl answered, blonde this time. Shorter too. I looked around the room. Frizzy hair really seemed to be in fashion this term. “Gloria Middleton,” my stomach twisted and I answered as normally as I could. Wasn’t enough to fool old McGonagall though. She stared at me, concern etched into her orderly expression. I hated every minute of that stare. All the teachers knew and I despised it. I loathed that they were reacting like this. As though I couldn’t take care of myself. As though I was being eaten up inside because of what happened. The thing I hated most though was that they were right. I was. The moment passed but not quickly enough to escape Remus’ curious looks in my direction, or Lily’s whisper in my ear asking what that was all about. I shrugged and watched McGonagall lecture us about our N.E.W.T.’s. Watched but didn’t listen. I could feel hate fill me up. It was all very well knowing and letting me know that she knew, but she was drawing attention to it. To what I was trying so desperately to forget. And now I knew Remus was beginning to catch on. Or would do soon. “Miss Middleton, are you listening?” McGonagall’s voice was crisp and angry. Good. I was in the mood for having a fight. “No” I heard James choke on the butterbeer he was undoubtedly sipping while McGonagall was preoccupied with me. Lily and Remus gasped on either side of me. The professors nostrils flared. “And why ever not?! Miss Middleton, you are having your N.E.W.T’s this year! You need to sort out your priorities; these examinations seriously affect your wizarding career! I don’t know what’s gotten into you miss Middleton, I know that times are difficult for you at the moment but I expected better from you!” Inwardly I flinched. The idea that I was disappointing anybody had always been something that had hurt me. But it’s too late to turn back now. On the outside, I remain unfazed. I have to be. “Spare me the lecture McGonagall, if I wanted to hear your voice droning on and on and on, I would have been paying attention in the first place.” It had taken all my courage to say. But I said it and now I have to pay for my big mouth. It really is amazing to watch how thin her lips can go when she is angry. Scary too. I know I’m in for it now. And surprisingly, I care. It feels so good, to give a damn about something. I finally found an escape for the first time in weeks, I can feel something. “Miss Middleton,” the professor said crisply. “Go to the headmaster now and twenty points from Gryffindor for your complete lack of respect of a teacher. Now get out of my sight.” I walked out the door and got a glimpse of my friends staring at me in horror, before I slammed it shut behind me. The corridors were empty. Everyone was still in they’re classes. It was a shame I thought, that I let my temper get the better of me. I strolled leisurely to Dumbledore’s office. It was quick. He registered his surprise at my being sent to him. He told me how disappointed in me he was. He asked how I was coping after the incident. I looked into his eyes, they usually shone and twinkled, but as he gazed at me the light that enchanted so many seemed to have gone out. I managed to hold back my tears until I left his office. But once I stepped out from behind the stone gargoyles I ran. My eyesight was blurry and tears sparkled in my eyes. I found an empty classroom as the bell went and locked the door behind me. After so long the walls had finally come down. And for the first time I cried. The horror, the feeling of betrayal, the loneliness, finally I felt it. The numbness I’d felt for a month was finally gone. For the first time, I cried for my mother’s death. For the first time I welcomed the pain. A/n: Yep, third chapter out. I find that although this is not my most popular story (it used to be on my other account) I still love it as much as ever. If you prefer THT whatever, but if you bothered to read this, you might as well leave me a review and tell me what you think. Please note: If the concept of death or descriptions of blood and death ect offend you, or are sensitive topics for you, please be cautious while reading this chapter because the afore mentioned are included in this chapter. I woke up early. The rain was splattering against the window panes making so much noise I was surprised the others hadn’t woken up too. For a few minutes I lay in bed trying to get back to sleep, before giving up and flinging the covers away from me. I looked around at my dorm mates, and decided to have a shower. The hot water was refreshing and woke me up the way nothing else could. I stared at myself in the mirror as I dried my hair. Pale, bags under eyes and shaking. Not a good look. I got dressed and headed down to the common room. It was empty, just the way I like it. Which was good because I felt another cry coming on. I sat by the window and gazed down into the grounds thinking. And before I knew it, tears were pouring down my face and wouldn’t stop. I thought it would be okay to cry here, that no one would bother me. I was wrong, about two seconds later, a certain someone came out from under the invisibility cloak. Sirius stared at me. “Gloria?” he asked incredulously. I suppose he’d never seen me cry before. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach; I didn’t want my friends to know about my mother’s death. I wasn’t exactly sure why. I decided to ignore him and carried on crying quietly. “Gloria, what’s wrong?” “Noth-ing” I managed to choke, before being overcome with wracking sobs. Sirius glared at me disbelievingly, “What do you mean nothing? Gloria you never cry. Never in all my time of knowing you have you felt the need to have tears pouring down your face. Now tell me what’s wrong before I get James and Remus down here.” I could feel my eyes burning, I don’t even know why, I just knew that at that moment I hated everything about Sirius Black. From his perfect black hair to his anxious grey eyes. I had so much anger welling up inside me, how dare he stand there and try and worm into my business?! If I said there’s nothing wrong then it means there’s nothing wrong! “Leave me alone Sirius! Go away, just leave, get lost! I don’t need you to treat me like a piece of china! Go away! GO AWAY! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!” Sirius stood there for a moment looking hurt and confused. Then my anger switched targets. I didn’t hate Sirius; I hated myself. He looked at me coldly. “James is right, you have changed. Call me when my best friend decides to come back, until then I’m going to take your advice and piss off. I’ll see you around Middleton.” Then he turned and stormed up the staircase to the boys dormitory and slammed the door shut behind him. I gazed around the room in despair. I’d just lost my mum, now thanks to my own stupidity, I’d just lost one of my best friends. It was still early, much too early for breakfast. I didn’t want to stay here anymore. In the darkness it seemed as though the entire room had turned against me because of my bitchiness. I shivered slightly before stumbling out of the portrait hall, still crying. I wondered the halls vaguely and somehow ended up in Moaning Myrtles bathroom on the second floor. I could hear despairing sob-like snores coming from the miserly ghosts cubicle. Not that I could say anything, the amount of crying I’d been doing lately. My reflection gazed back at me from every mirror, angry and confused. Looking exactly how I felt. I thought about everything, my mothers death, my fathers drinking, the loneliness I’d felt all summer, my own insignificance, the gaping hole in my heart I was trying to smother, James obsession with Lily and finally the fight I had with Sirius. Everything pounded through my head, the past two months being replayed in my mind. Fresh tears spilled down my cheeks and all the emotions I’d been trying to keep locked away took control. I punched the nearest mirror, shattering the glass to pieces, just like my sanity. Blood flowed down my arm from my knuckles as Moaning Myrtle woke and started shrieking. I punched and kicked and screamed, glass flying everywhere, taps were turned on and left running.. I whirled around to face the last mirror and stopped. My robes were drenched with blood, I had cuts and scratches across my face, and my skirt was torn in several places. My hair was soaked through and stuck out oddly. As I stared transfixed at my reflection, my anger still there, I became aware of a pain spreading throughout my entire body. My strength was ebbing away as I struggled to stand upright. I glanced down at my stomach to see a large piece of glass sticking through it. And suddenly I was falling into blackness, but not before I hit the glass strewn, water covered floor with a soft thump. Myrtles screams became quieter and quieter as my vision faded away. And all the while realising it was so early no one would find me before I bled to death. With that comforting thought I fell into a deep, death inducing sleep, probably never to wake up again. Sirius slammed the door behind him, remembering too late that he had four dorm mates who had, up until that point been deeply asleep. “Oy Pads!” shouted James from behind his curtained four-poster. “I told you to come in quietly when you got back! And there you go slamming the door! You just awoke me from a dream where I was making out with Evans!” Sirius rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to reply, but Remus beat him to it. “Prongs, you have dreams about eating lily’s face every other night, so quit complaining so we can all go back to sleep.” Sirius smiled before going to take a shower. He kept replaying the scene that had just taken place in his head. He’d never seen Gloria cry before, it was slightly disturbing to see someone usually so strong minded so vulnerable. It wasn’t like her at all. He was confused and didn’t understand. He thought back to his conversation with James and Remus on the school train., Remus was right, there was obviously something wrong with her, he just wished she’d tell them. By the time Sirius stepped out the bathroom it was about six o’clock and there was no point going to bed. He got dressed and after a moments hesitation retrieved the marauders map from under a loose floor board. It couldn’t hurt to see where she was, after all, he did feel slightly guilty for snapping at her so quickly when she was so obviously distressed. He scanned the map for her dot, she wasn’t in the girls dormitories….nope, not in the astronomy tower……then as he began to think she’d just vanished off the face of the earth, he spotted her in moaning Myrtles bathroom. And she wasn’t moving. His heart stopped for the tiniest moment before he screamed at James to get up and they both ran out of Gryffindor tower as Sirius explained everything. They jumped down the stairs and hurtled along the second floor corridor, panting for breath. James shoved the door open and they both stopped dead. Glass was scattered all over the floor, sinks were overflowing and spewing water onto the ground. Every mirror except one had been smashed and they’re empty frames were smeared with blood. Myrtle was screeching from her place by the window. And in the centre of the room, covered in blood, with glass sticking through her stomach, clearly dead, was Gloria. A/n: So I've finally got to where this story stopped on my other account. I left you all hanging with this cliffy (for those of you who knew me as Disco Alien) and you all hated me for it. Although I have to say 100_percent_witch was very understanding. So please watch this space because I intend to update this soon. Though "The Hardest Thing" seems to be my main priority at the moment.....Anyways, please review and tell me what you think. It's funny that this was my most popular story on my other account yet no one seems to bother with it on this one. Disclaimer: If you are bothering to read this disclaimer then you really are stupid; how many times do I have to say it for the simple fact to penetrate your skulls!?! Blackness. Blackness and pain. Swirling around and around. Voices screaming from nowhere. Voices with no face. Voices with no memory or recognition behind them. Voices with nothing. Flashes of people, blurry and panicking. An empty corridor. A room full of beds. A woman in a uniform. Blackness. Screams. Pain. And then I saw her. Pale and frightened looking. Crying. She lingered behind them. They couldn’t see her. I had my eyes closed, but somehow I could see her standing there. Staring at me. Saying nothing. She just watched in silence as the nurse tried to revive me. As two boys screamed and pleaded. And behind her was a white light. Beckoning to me. I was only dimly aware of everything but her. Long brown hair cascaded down her back in chocolate coloured curls. Her skin was white and creamy looking. She seemed to glow with the white light that was calling me towards it. Her green eyes glittered, sparkled with tears. They poured down her face, shining like liquid diamonds. Shock coursed through me, shock and joy and sadness and anger. She was so beautiful. She just looked and shook her head at me. “Mummy?” It came out a whisper, a shaking, disbelieving whisper that nobody ever heard. A little girl’s cry for something she has lost. Something beloved. Something she would never get back. Then there was only blackness and everything faded, only leaving a bitter memory to give me nightmares. She lay there, bandaged and bruised. She looked so small and fragile; it wasn’t a sight that he liked. She was pale and clammy. Madame Pomphrey hovered around her, trying to heal her before it was too late. He watched as one of his best friends had the life in her quickly sapped away. She didn’t make a sound, just lay there dying. She grew whiter and whiter and everyone grew more and more panicked. Her eyes started to move vividly under her half closed eyelids. A shocked expression took over her features as her pupils landed by a spot just behind him. He turned around, but there was no one there. As he turned back to face her, a single word escaped her now blue lips in a breathless whisper. “Mummy?” Her eyes unfocused and closed. He could have sworn he saw her skin glowing with the reflections of a white light. Remus Lupin fled the room, mind spinning, determined to figure out the mysteries surrounding the only girl who had ever really understood him. I blinked. The hospital came swarming into view, too bright, a harsh world burning my eyes. James and Sirius sat beside me. I lay there weak, unable to move wrapped up in so many bandages that I felt clumsy and heavy. They stared at me in silence for a while. “What the hell did you go and do a thing like that for kiddo?” James asked in a frightened whisper. I looked at their anguished faces, they’re eyes were red, perhaps they’d even been crying. “We though you’d died!” Sirius shouted suddenly making us both jump. I didn’t say anything and they gazed at me imploringly, trying to see why I was here. Why I’d been so filled with such anger and hurt and grief. Why couldn’t they see? Why couldn’t they figure it out? If they really were my best friends, they’d be smart enough to find out the truth. And as much as I want someone to find out, at the same time I know I’m going to try my hardest to cover it up. It’s my dilemma. You see, I’ve never been one to accept help. Never. And I don’t know how to ask for it. I need help, but I don’t want it. So instead I’m going to sit here, in eternal torment because my mother died and I don’t know how to forgive myself. I stared at the ceiling and they left after a long, long time. I remained in the hospital wing for a week against my will. All I could think about was the ghostly apparition that had appeared before me. My mother had been there, I’m sure of it. It was her. She came to me but would not speak. I saw the tears and it’s breaking my heart. Slowly and surely but its happening. I don’t know how to fix it. I don’t know how to get rid of the heartache. Sure, now I can feel the pain. It took a month for me to cry and now that’s all I ever do. Linger on in my bitter existence. Crying. It’s funny, they can get rid of the hole in my stomach but they can’t banish the one in my heart. I was once the happiest person in the world and it’s all fallen away. Everything I had is lost. My life is crumbling around my head and I can’t reach the broken pieces. I have no glue. I can’t put it back together again. I’m lying here, broken, beaten and bitter. I almost died. I could have escaped it all, but my mother saved me. She stopped me. She brought me back to life. Or what’s left of it. The shadows are flickering on the wall beside me and I feel no sense of time. I’m lost. I’m dead but I’m still living. I never before knew it was possible to stay alive even when your heart stops beating. When it dies and withers away, just a lump of coal pumping blood around your body. That’s what I am. I’m alive but I died the moment my mother did. When her life ended, so did mine. She needn’t have saved me from death, in truth, I’m already dead. A/n: So yeah.......I know that lot's of my readers are probably annoyed for not updating TWBD instead of this, but I really do still love this story and I thought I should probably make it more of a prioity and share out posting chapter equally. That said I'll still probably go back to updating TWBD more than I do this. Ah well. Disclaimer: Need I say anything? The message should have sunk in by now! The library was a place of comfort, of knowledge, of control. A place where troubles could be temporarily forgotten while searching for what the mind seeks. A place that tells people everything they could ever need to know. A place that had never yet let Remus Lupin down in his quest for understanding. Until now. The library provided Remus with valuable information. A curse he needed to make a prank successful. The wisdom of how take care of his friends when they got into trouble. The library was his security blanket. As he subconsciously thought to himself, when in doubt go to the library. Right now Remus was in serious doubt. He needed an answer and for once it wasn’t something the library could give him. Right now he needed to find out what was wrong with his best friend. And for the first time, it was a problem that going to the library wouldn’t solve. He stood helplessly surrounded by shelves, looking up at the rows upon rows of knowledge inducing books. None of the hundreds of thousands of pages of printed words could answer his question. And it frightened him. All the way through school he had always been the one to save his friends from trouble, even something as miniscule as detention. For the first time, the library was denying him the power to do that. For the first time, he, Remus Lupin, was the helpless marauder. He was the one who needed saving. So that he in turn, could save his best friend, his family, his sister. The sister he had never had. I left the hospital wing a week after waking up. They tried to stop me, restrain me, but I wouldn’t let them. I am dead, but that doesn’t mean I will let them control me. I can barely control myself. As I walked the corridors up to Gryffindor tower, people stared at me. I suppose I was stupid not to realise there would be rumours about my disappearance. Or rather my excursion to the hospital wing. I walked up to my dormitory, still covered in blood and not caring. Not caring what anyone thought. Not even myself. I had no thoughts, I just didn’t care. Let them stare at me with they’re false pity and concern. I don’t need any of it. I don’t need anything. Or anyone. But even as I think that I know I’m wrong. I know I need someone. I know I need something. I need my mum to be alive. I need my dad to stop drinking. I need my sister to come home from wherever she ran away to. I need my best friends to figure out how to stop me from getting sucked into this downwards spiral. I need my life to go back to normal. As I collapse on my bed everything I need and want strikes me down. Everything my life was and everything I need it to be brings terrible, powerful longing to my heart. I lie here, in the semi-darkness, alone with the curtains pulled shut. But I’ve no more tears to cry. No more emotion allowed to escape me. I can feel, but I cannot show it. I am no longer numb, but I look it to the outside world. It’s too late. I need my friends to pull me off this spiral, but I’ve already been sucked down so far, it’s too late to get off. I am a prisoner. A victim of my own despair. I need my life to go back to normal, but now I know there is no going back. Lily stood by the dormitory door. To anyone watching she would appear cool and collected, but inside she was fighting two sides of herself. She really needed to see if Gloria was okay. She came back from the hospital wing hours ago, apparently covered in dried blood. Of course first year eyewitnesses were never terribly reliable as her experience as a prefect had taught her, but Sirius had told her they found her in a bad way. A really bad way. Another part of her, respected that she may need to be alone. The side of her that knew what it felt like to loose a loved one. For she had no doubt that that was what was causing her to act this way. Having lost her sister, Lily recognised the signs immediately. Okay, so her sister wasn’t dead, but she was no longer the person she knew. To Lily, it felt like she’d lost her sister. Like she was dead. She may as well be because there was no way in hell that the girl she’d lived with over the holidays was her beloved sister Petunia. No, the person she used to know was dead. This had many different effects on her. She was surprised no one had noticed she didn’t eat. She was surprised no one heard her shoving her fingers down her throat and throwing up every night. Lily realised what no one else did. That Gloria Middleton was suffering eternal torment. But no one realised that two Gryffindor girls were stuck on a downwards spiral. People realised that something was wrong with Gloria, even though she was practically invisible while around her best friends. But no one suspected that Lily Evans, prefect, head girl, slug club member, straight A student, was also suffering. No one saw what was right in front of them, what was so plainly obvious that it went unnoticed. No one saw the real Lily Evans. Struggling with an eating disorder and dead on the inside. That was why she fought a conflict with herself outside the seventh year girls dormitory. She knew Gloria needed help. But she knew that ignoring Gloria’s pain and focusing on her own was easier for her to do. Lily Evans was a good but broken person. And right now, she was struggling to make the choice between what was right…and what was easy. What no one realised was that more than one seventh year girl was being trapped on a downwards spiral. Disclaimer: I am Jk Rowling, get down on your knees and grovel…….okay, if you were stupid enough to fall for that then you really need to apply for a brain! Remus Lupin was a clever person. Over the last two days he had pieced together everything everybody had told him about Gloria. About the fight with Sirius, her tetchiness with James, apparently one of her dormitory members heard her talking in her sleep. She had a new look, a new attitude and the accident scared him. He began to think back to when this new Gloria suddenly appeared out of nowhere. He sat in the library, scribbling everything he could think of on a sheet of parchment. Logically, he thought, whatever happened to make her like this, occurred sometime in the summer. He tapped his quill absentmindedly on the table he was working at, splattering ink everywhere and earning himself a disapproving glare from Madame Pince which he ignored. He was still staring vacantly into space, lost in thought when Lily suddenly appeared out of nowhere. She had been sitting opposite him for five minutes before he noticed her with a start and toppling ungracefully off his chair. “Lily!” He choked from the floor indignantly. “You know it’s not very polite to ignore people Remus.” She said with a woeful expression on her face. She extended her hand and hoisted him up off the floor. “I wasn’t ignoring you; I was just deep in thought!” Lily snorted before saying that having a marauder think was never a good thing so it was just as well she startled him out of his reverie. “What were you thinking about anyway?” She demanded. “If it’s an idea for some new prank you had better abandon whatever horrible plans you thought of before I report you!” She sounded stern but the effect was ruined somewhat by the fact that she was looking vaguely amused as she remembered the last hilarious stunt they had pulled. “It seems you have a sense of humour after all Lily, James will be pleased. And so you know, Gloria is the mastermind behind the marauders, not me…… I was thinking about her actually.” He added quietly. Lily gazed worriedly at him before gently taking the list from his hands and looking at it. She stayed silent for a long time after putting it down. Eventually she spoke in a thoughtful kind of way. “Well,” she said slowly, “it seems you’re having trouble knowing where to start finding out what happened.” Remus nodded heavily and sighed putting his head in his hands. Everything was just a mess and he didn’t know how to fix it. Lily looked at him pityingly before reaching for the parchment again. She twirled his abandoned quill in her hand and then pocketed it. She stood up and said quietly, “You have prefect duty in an hour Remus, I suggest you go and get something to eat before you have to patrol the corridors, goodness knows it is not an enjoyable task on an empty stomach.” Remus looked up to see her walk away, still twirling his quill in her hand. He frowned as he gathered his things together before going down to dinner. Lily stared at her reflection in the mirror. She could see fat everywhere on her body. On her thighs, her arms, her hips. Everything her sister said to her over the summer seemed to be replaying inside her head until she thought she would scream. She hated this. She hated her sister for hating her, she hated the world for making her a witch and she hated herself because she couldn’t stop. She had always thought of herself as stronger than this. She had pitied girls like her for being so weak and self-indulgent. Never in a million years had she believed that anything could reduce her to this. But she smiled to herself bitterly knowing that though she was losing the war, she had won a battle. And that battle could win someone else’s war. Lily Evans had made her choice. With any luck Gloria Middleton would be saved. She had left a trail, now it was up to Remus Lupin to follow it. Remus sat stabbing at his dinner next to James and Sirius, who were both having an intense discussion about who was better looking, Lily or a brunette seventh year Ravenclaw called Marianne. Giving his shepherds pie up as a hopeless case he stood up and wandered off to the Gryffindor common room for awhile; he still had forty minutes before he was due for prefect duty. He clambered through the portrait hole and collapsed moodily into one of his favourite squishy armchairs staring at the fire. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Gloria descend the girl’s staircase, obviously heading down for dinner. Her eyes were blank and expressionless. They scared him beyond anything else she had done so far that term. He searched in his pockets for his list of ideas, hoping perhaps this time, an idea may come to him, though he doubted it. He was fairly astonished however to find a single word scribbled in neat handwriting across the bottom of the list. Gisele A ray of hope filled him as that single word struck him with an idea. Prefect duty would have to wait, right now he had a letter to write. Three hundred miles away, in a grimy English city an owl pecked on the window of a particularly dingy apartment before being ushered in fearfully by it’s resident. She opened the letter and read it curiously, the owl still sitting precariously on her shoulder. A single tear escaped her as she sat down at her desk and pulled a sheet of parchment towards her. This was going to one depressing letter to write. Gisele Middleton picked up a battered quill and wondered where to begin. a/n: Okay I know this chapter was unbearably short and I'm sorry! I've been favouring Unleashed for awhile so i might start giving this story more attention. But only if you REVIEW! WPMENPSU DIBNCFS PG TFDSBUT EBFM XJUI UIF EFWJM VOCSFBLBMF WPX DVSF EDBUI GBUIFS GBNJMZ Remus stared at the parchment in despair. He had been expecting a fat letter full of logical answers. Instead he got a load of nonsense words. Perhaps Gisele was even more unhinged than Gloria was becoming. With a sigh Remus abandoned it on the table thinking about how he could move on from here. It appeared he had come to a dead end. Perhaps there was nothing more he could do. With a huge yawn Remus fell asleep in front of the fire. It was pitch black and deathly silent. As though time itself had frozen. A blackness darker than the night itself seeped eerily into the flat. Unrolling like a fog of evil it searched for its next victim. It searched, it found and it devoured. Nobody heard the screams. Gloria felt them. Gloria heard. Gloria saw. I sat up abruptly feeling my heart pound erratically in my chest and the echoes of screams ringing in my ears. It hurts so much as I clamber out of bed. I can’t breathe and my chest sears in pain as I try. Tears spurt in my eyes as I crawl to the bathroom and throw up in the sink. The dream flashes in front of my eyes as I lie on the floor, feeling the cold stone on my skin and the pain ebbs away. I try to tell myself that it was just another nightmare. But as I do so I realize the details were different, the screams weren’t those of my mothers. The face contorted in pain, although similar, wasn’t hers. The rooms I saw are not in my house. A deep, paralyzing feeling runs through me and I can’t move as I replay the dream over and over again in my mind. My stomach heaves and I’m sick all over again. Then the numbing fear settles around my head and I suddenly feel so tired. My eyes start to close but I drag myself down to the common room. Staring at the rain until morning. I’m too scared to let myself go back to sleep. James awoke to the sound of Sirius snoring. It annoyed him beyond anything else in the world, being woken up so early on a Saturday. For gods sake it was only eleven o’clock in the morning! Grumpily he picked up his wand and jabbed it in his best friends direction. A loud cry awoke anyone still asleep as Sirius was hung upside down by the ankle. “James you bastard, let me down!” James laughed as he Sirius struggled in vain to lift the spell. It was a pointless action considering his wand was on the floor. “Padfoot this is your punishment for waking me with your foghorn SNORING!” Sirius spluttered indignantly. “I do not snore!” he shouted. He aimed a kick and knocked James’ wand to the floor before falling on his bed with a thump. He grinned wolfishly and James gulped. “You are so dead Prongs!” But James didn’t hear him. He was already sprinting away down the stairs to the common room. Sirius followed and Remus wearily dragged himself out of bed to watch the soon-to-be-fight. There was however no fight as Professor McGonagall appeared in Gryffindor tower rather suddenly looking grim. The look on her face was enough to make the whole of her house stop and stare. “Miss Middleton,” she commanded, beckoning over to the student. James turned to see Gloria looking pale and clammy sitting in her pajamas. Her hair was knotted and she looked positively sick with anxiety. She got up stiffly and followed the Professor without question with the air of one walking to their execution. The common room erupted in gossip as soon as the portrait hole was closed. Sirius looked worried and Remus pensive. The fight was forgotten as they waited and worried. She took me to Dumbledore’s office. I sat before him perched on the edge of my chair hoping very much I wouldn’t throw up on his shoes. “Miss Middleton,” he said gravely, “I have some very bad news for you. In fact, I rather wonder where to begin.” The panicky fear that struck me last night seemed to grip my heart painfully and I clutched the sides of the chair hoping he wasn’t going to tell me what I was so afraid to hear. “Miss Middleton, early this morning your sister was discovered dead in a muggle residential area.” I stare at him feeling an icy surge of terror stabbing through me. My sister is dead. Oh my god, my sister is dead, the words repeat in my ears and I can’t stop them. My head starts to swim and I see her face as she screams. I run over to the window and throw up down the side of the castle. I gasp and stumble as Dumbledore tries to console me. I can see his lips moving but I can’t hear what he’s trying to say. And right now I just don’t care. I can’t. There’s no room inside me to care because my sister is dead. I saw her die and it was real. I need to run, to get away and I lunge out the office into the rest of the school not caring that I’m in my pajamas, that I’ve got splatters of sick on my face or that my hair is a tangled grease pit. I need to run and I’m running while trying to get my head around the awful truth that my sister didn’t die by accident……she was murdered. Sirius drummed his fingers on the armchair with his eyes fixed firmly on the portrait hole. It had been four hours since Gloria had been carted off with McGonagall and she still hadn’t returned to Gryffindor tower. Usually he’d think nothing of it, Gloria was always going off by herself but nowadays……well, there was something seriously wrong with her. “Sirius mate,” James’ voice said hoarsely from beside him, “she’s been gone for hours now; I don’t think she’s coming back anytime soon.” “Something has happened Prongs, we need to find her. I don’t think she’s safe on her own.” James nodded as he pulled out the marauders map, knowing what Sirius was implying but what they were both too afraid to say aloud. They weren’t concerned that someone would hurt her while she was alone with no one to protect her. They were more concerned of what she would do to herself with no one there to stop her. Sitting there in the common room they searched for her dot on the map, hoping against hope that she was alright. A/n: Hehe so two dead family members and a nonsense letter! I guess I've left a mystery for all you folks to try and solve. This chapter has vital clues in it so keep looking. I'm afraid stuff is going to get just a tad more depressing although I've tried to balance it with humour from the marauders. Hope you liked this one; show you're appreciation by reviewing. Hmmm, Actually; I think I'm going to leave you a little preview of next chapter! Cos I love you all so much! Ahem: Preview of Chapter nine! It’s cold here. It’s so very cold, but I can’t feel it. I know I should but I can’t. I’m too tired. Sitting here by the black lake I start to think. And I try my hardest not to. It’s hurts too much. I feel so numb yet every thought I have brings so much pain. I try my hardest to remember before this all started but there is so much that I can’t seem to find. Everything is so blank and empty, and I hate it. I hate it so much, knowing that there are some memories I’m probably never going to get back. The sun is setting and it starts to rain heavily but I can’t move. I feel so drained I don’t think I’ll ever be able to move again. So....I guess if you want me to update soon you had better LEAVE MANY REVIEWS hehe :D It’s cold here. It’s so very cold, but I can’t feel it. I know I should but I can’t. I’m too tired. Sitting here by the black lake I start to think. And I try my hardest not to. It’s hurts too much. I feel so numb yet every thought I have brings so much pain. I try my hardest to remember before this all started but there is so much that I can’t seem to find. Everything is so blank and empty, and I hate it. I hate it so much, knowing that there are some memories I’m probably never going to get back. The sun is setting and it starts to rain heavily but I can’t move. I feel so drained I don’t think I’ll ever be able to move again. “Do you think we should go find her?” asked Sirius quietly still gazing at the map. James ran his fingers through his hair and sighed burying his face in his hands. “I don’t know. Who knows what state of mind she could be in?” “I’ll go,” said Lily from behind them. Both marauders jumped a mile and hastily tried to stow away the map without her noticing. “Forget it guys, I’ve already had a good look at it. Considering it shows everyone in Hogwarts you should have been able to see me coming.” She tapped her fingers against her teeth. “And at least now I know the secret behind all your magnificent yet thoroughly wrong pranks.” James whimpered clutching the chair. “Y-y-y-y-your not going to hand it in are you?” Sirius stuttered. Lily snorted. “Hell no. It’s a really good piece of magic. And it’s quite handy for keeping an eye on…..people.” Sirius folded his arms. “And what makes you think you should be the one to go?” He demanded “Not just me,” said Lily shrugging, “I think James should come too.” “Why not me?” Sirius asked in a hurt voice. “Because,” Lily said slowly, “You and Gloria have the most friction. You fight like an old married couple.” There was a short pause. “It doesn’t help that you fancy her either.” Lily added as an after thought. Sirius spluttered as Lily yanked the map from his hands and started towards the portrait hole. “She’s right you know.” Said James before following her. Sirius keeled over dramatically on the couch and proceeded to roll onto the stone floor. There was a long silence. “Oww.” Said Sirius’ voice from the ground. “Gloria?” said Lily gently. James stood a little way behind her, hovering uncertainly in the background. Lily rolled her eyes before sitting next to Gloria on the cold hard ground. “Hey,” she whispered gently, “are you okay?” Gloria turned to look at her slowly, looking a mess. She was still in her pyjamas Lily noticed and her hair was tangled. She looked incredibly ill. “I don’t remember.” Lily turned to James and mouthed “help” frantically at him. “What do you mean, you don’t remember? You don’t remember what?” James sat quietly on Gloria’s other side and held her hand. “Stuff…..before all this started. It’s all gone. Where’s it gone? Why can’t I find it?” Lily and James shared an alarmed look before turning back to her. “Before all what started Gloria?” asked James tensely gripping her hand hard. But Gloria didn’t even wince at the pressure. “Before m-my mum died.” James gasped. “Your mum died? Gloria why didn’t you tell us?” “It hurt too much. I-it hurts all the time. And now something bad has happened. James, My sister, she’s, she’s d-dead too.” Lily closed her eyes as she heard Gloria’s voice crack uncontrollably, before taking her other hand. “It’s okay Glory,” she whispered. “Everything’s going to be okay. We’ll get permission from Dumbledore and you can go see her body, before, before the funeral.” Gloria started to cry, rocking backwards and forwards with her arms wrapped protectively around herself. “But that’s j-just it,” She choked wildly, “I’ve already seen it!” James frowned and Lily felt confused. “But Glory,” he said as though trying to be reasonable, “you haven’t left school today; you’ve been here the whole time.” Gloria stopped crying abruptly and turned slowly to look at him. “I knew she was dead this morning, even before McGonagall took me away. I knew it because I had seen it,” she whispered looking totally mad. “I saw it all. She called out to me. I heard the screams and I saw the light leave her. I was there. I saw her in my dreams. I saw her being murdered.” James looked terrified but Lily suddenly remembered hearing someone being sick in the bathroom last night, stumbling around, crying. She’s been half asleep and thought it was just her dreaming of herself the previous day. Now however, she knew better. “It was you.” She said quietly. “I heard you. I thought I was dreaming, but, it was you.” Gloria sobbed and together Lily and James hauled her up to the castle. They left her sleeping in the girls dorm. Sirius sat up from the floor. “What the hell were you doing down there?” asked James. Sirius shrugged. “Where’s Remus?” demanded Lily looking desperate. “In the library probably, why?” “Because I just found the answers he was looking for!” shouted Lily already half out the portrait hole leaving James and Sirius looking very confused. “I am never going to understand that girl.” Said Sirius. James let out a snort of laughter. “Welcome to my world Padfoot, welcome to my world.” A/N: So what do you think? I must say since I went away you have all been very stingy with you're reviews. I am having withdrawl symptoms. I know this story is getting increasingly depressing so I've added some light hearted humour in the hope of balancing it out a bit. Still. I think there are about five more depressing chapters before it gets a bit better. I'm sick of writing about misery believe it or not. Hmm, I can't promise that it will all be fluffy bunnies and rainbows but as Ana put it "Gloria whatever Middleton deserves some happiness." And I quite agree. So. Apart from the whole five chapters which depict her sisters funeral; stuff is going to progress, including the start of some very subtle Lily/James action. And perhaps the beginning of some Sirius/Gloria too. Who knows? After all I am feeling generous. “REMUS!” Screamed a voice at the top of it’s owners lungs and he jerked awake his heart beating like mad. Lily was sprinting towards him with such ferocity that he had clambered under the table for protection before he realized what he was doing. Shouts of protest at Lily’s screaming followed her throughout the library. “Lily,” he started, “what in God’s name are you-” But he didn’t get to finish his sentence because he found himself being pulled along by his shirt in a mad race out of the library. Looking back he realized that this was because fifty heavy looking books were zooming along behind them trying to whack them round the head. Remus gulped and over took Lily. They burst through the doors and slammed them shut behind them. Several heavy thuds echoed sinisterly through the wood. Lily was gasping while massaging her ribs, her clothes hanging off her loosely. “What’s all this about?” He asked quizzically raising his eyebrows at her. “I know- I know what’s wrong with Gloria,” she panted before sinking to the floor. Remus frowned. “Are you alright?” He questioned. Lily nodded keeping her eyes closed. Quietly she began to speak. “Her mother died. In the summer holidays. That’s why she went all funny. But it’s worse now Remus, it’s so much worse. Her sister, she’s, well she’s dead too. Gloria saw it happen in her sleep, she was murdered last night.” “Shit!” he shouted kicking the wall and trying to stop tears from forming in his eyes. Gloria’s family had been almost like his own, having known her since he was two. The loss of her mother and sister felt almost like he’d lost his own. His vision cleared and he glanced down at Lily. Her face was drawn and pale, making her cheekbones stick out and her breathing was laboured. Her red hair, usually lustrous and vibrant fell limply around her face. She got up and he noticed for the first time how slender her limbs were, how thin she was, how her bones stuck out where they hadn’t before. “I’ll see you later Remus,” she said faintly and was at the other end of the corridor so quickly he could have sworn she had disaprated there. “Aren’t you going to dinner?” He called after her. Lily stopped and looked back at him briefly before smiling, or at least trying to. “I’ll get something later,” she whispered not quite meeting his eyes before disappearing completely. Remus continued to stare at the spot she’d been standing. One thing he knew about Lily for sure, was that she was a bad liar. A face swam before her in pitch black. It had slits for nostrils and eyes full of red malice, there was nothing else to see and so she could not look away. And all the while those eyes moved, searching for her. Knowing she was nearby, they glanced over her again and again. And each time they did Gloria grew more afraid that she would be spotted. She knew that it wanted her. And she was very afraid. Tendrils of darkness slithered around her, threatening to trap her. She backed away but ended up where she started. One wrapped itself suddenly around her leg and the eyes snapped back to her face. This time she was no longer invisible. The eyes gleamed. “I see you.” A voice more terrible than any other she had ever heard hissed at her. The tendrils swirled around her, binding her, dragging her closer to the voice. A hand rose out of the blackness and spider like fingers grasped her face and one ran itself across her cheek. Searing pain flashed across her cheek and Gloria screamed. “Your mine now,” Sirius stiffened hearing a sudden scream. He had gone up to bed early in the hopes of squeezing all his confusing thoughts out of his head. (No such thing had happened of course) He threw back his curtains and pounded a slab of wall. A tunnel appeared and he raced through it to the girl’s dormitory. Gloria lay on the floor by her bed, tangled in the bed sheets that were trailing off the mattress. She writhed and struggled against her imprisonment uncontrollably. Sirius dashed to her side on the floor and tried to free her from the sheets. He held her trembling body in his arms and she shifted as though having a fit. Her eyes roamed speedily under their lids and then she screamed louder than he had ever heard anyone scream in his life. Something red spurted across his vision before he realized her blood was all over him and Gloria stopped writhing. He could feel her shaking and held her tightly. A few tears poured out of her closed eyes and her breathing was ragged and irrational. A deep gash was oozing blood across her cheek. “Thank you,” she whispered into his shoulder. Sirius stroked her hair in response and they stayed like that until they fell asleep. Lily wandered aimlessly around Hogwarts, seeing nothing. Stabs of hunger struck her stomach continuously and she felt tired beyond belief. Who knew something so simple as running could make her feel like this? She had no energy and no clue where she was. The darkening halls of the school seemed to shift and blur before her eyes. Everything looked the same. She didn’t see the stairs. Only the floor rising up to meet her. I woke up feeling groggy. My back was stiff and my hair knotted. My face stung and cracked when I moved. I opened my eyes to find myself on the floor. That would explain the backache, I thought tiredly. I rolled over to see a large dark shape snoring on the floor beside me. I gingerly prodded it with my foot and it grunted, before lazily muttering, “Go away prongs...” I sat bolt upright, realizing in shock that Sirius was in the girls dormitory. The silence (apart from Sirius’ snoring) echoed heavily on me and I pulled back the hangings from everyone’s beds. They were all empty. Then I remembered that they had all left on a camping trip for muggle studies. It was a test, I realized, suddenly recalling a conversation I had overheard between Lily and Dorcas. Then with a thrill of horror I remembered that Lily didn’t take muggle studies because she herself was a muggleborn. And Lily’s bed was just like everyone else’s. It was empty. Lily groaned and rolled over, trying to open her eyes but failing. It was easier to just lie there, wherever she was, not thinking about anything. She blinked blearily, trying again and raised her head a few inches. Everything was out of focus and moving, swaying to and fro in front of her. She felt like the ground was moving beneath her and she started to feel very sick. Her arm had pain shooting through it and it made her eyes water. She put her head back on the ground and tried not to pass out. I ran throughout the halls of Hogwarts in the early hours of the morning searching for Lily. I paused as I glanced over the banister of the marble staircase on the seventh floor and what she saw made me feel sick. Several floors down I could just make out a violent splash of red on the smooth surface. That was all I needed to see. I sprinted down the stairs until I got to the third floor. There was the puddle of blood splattered all over the stairs. And there was Lily, lying in a heap at the bottom, her right arm bent awkwardly and dried blood caked to the side of her head. “Lily!” “Mmmph,” she mumbled into the floor, with her eyes closed as I dashed down the stairs towards her, almost slipping on her blood. “Are you okay?” I asked kneeling at her side. Lily raised her head and opened her eyes, squinting at me as if to say, “Do I look okay?” “You need to go to the hospital wing.” “I know. Can you help me up please? The world won’t stop spinning.” I carefully put my arm around Lily and lifted her off the floor. She sagged against me and her head flopped on her shoulder as we walked. “How did you know where to find me?” She asked softly sounding a million miles away in her mind. “I woke up and you weren’t there. I figured something must have happened cos everyone else was on that muggle studies trip except me and you.” I pushed open the heavy hospital doors with difficulty as I as trying to help Lily stay upright as I did so. I wandered in and set Lily down on a bed before going to get Madam Pomfrey. After ten minutes Lily had fallen asleep again, with her arm in a cast and several empty potion bottles on her bedside table. Sirius woke up feeling as though he had fallen off a cliff in his sleep. His body ached all over from lying on the floor and it was this that reminded him that he was in the girl’s dormitory. He sat up with a sigh and noticed that Gloria was gone. It was too early in the morning for him to be properly worried so he decided to go down to breakfast and hope that she was already there. When I was worrying about Lily I felt good. I was focusing on something. I feel so strange sitting here at breakfast on my own. My thoughts aren’t bouncing off things like they usually do. They just keep on going and going with nothing to stop them. I don’t know how to shut them off. I want to shut them off. I want them to go away. So they will. If I pretend their not there, maybe they will go away. If I don’t think about it, any of it, I won’t feel this way. Everything will be fine. It has to be. Because I can’t go on with this emptiness anymore. James sat down beside her with a thump as did Sirius on her other side. Remus however sank groggily into the seat opposite her, laid his head on the table and at once started to snore. Gloria laughed at the sight of him and turned to James still smiling. “Awww, you two are so mean! Making him get up so early. Why don’t you let him lie in for a change?” “Because my lady, then there would be nothing to keep us entertained at breakfast.” Sirius announced flamboyantly, looking glad to have found her in a good mood. Gloria snorted into her coffee and James had a sudden idea as he helped himself to pancakes. “So I’m holding quidditch try-outs this week,” he started sounding off-hand. “Cool,” Sirius said with half his face in his breakfast, “I’ll be looking forward to a nice day off to relax.” “Sirius you still need to try out, for all I know there could be someone much better at whacking bludgers than you.” Sirius choked on his coffee looking offended. “How could anyone possibly be better at smacking mad flying rocks at bastard quidditch players than me?” he demanded. “Not that your big headed or anything,” said Gloria taking a sip of Sirius’ coffee. Sirius gaped at her as she cheekily drank his coffee. Her hair was glinting in the early morning sunlight and the look she tossed him so carelessly made him temporarily speechless. James noticed this and hastily resumed the conversation hoping Gloria wouldn’t notice. “So are you going to try out this year?” James asked her. Gloria looked thoughtful for a moment. She had played quidditch for Gryffindor last year as a reserve and she figured it would be a good distraction. “Sure, why not?” She said smiling, “maybe I’ll get Lily to try out too.” James stared at her. “Lily can play quidditch?” Gloria laughed as she finished the coffee that had once belonged to Sirius and helped herself to another bacon sandwich. “She’s a good flier but I dunno how great she is at catching a ball and scoring. Yeah, she’ll probably try out with me. If she’s better by then.” “Why? What’s wrong with her?” James asked worriedly. Gloria looked at him with an odd expression on her face. It was like she’d suddenly realized her sister had died just over twenty four hours ago. Frowning slightly she answered slowly. “Oh, I noticed her bed was empty this morning and I found her in a heap at the bottom of the marble staircase. I think she’d broken her arm.” Remus gave a great grunting snore at that moment and woke up with a huge yawn. “Nice to see you could join us Moony.” Sirius said idly from where he was sitting. Remus simply glared at him and drank straight from the coffee jug, apparently still feeling very asleep. Remus was not a morning person. He knocked over a jug of orange juice and a stack of toast as he tried to pile kippers onto his plate and put the coffee jug down at the same time. Eventually he gave up and let Gloria feed him as she took pity on his comatose state. “Awww look at the happy couple!” James sang out, glancing at Sirius with a grin. Sirius grunted and Gloria smacked James playfully around the head. And all the while James could help but wonder, where was the grief stricken, messed up Gloria from yesterday? It was as though she had just shut it all out. As though her mother and sister hadn’t died merely six weeks apart. How could someone who had lost so much, act as though she wasn’t being affected by it? How could you turn off your pain like a light switch? How could you act like it was a normal day when your sister had been robbed of her life two nights before? How could you sit there and be happy, when you saw her murdered before your very eyes? But Gloria continued to laugh and joke and smile as the day went on. And the longer she kept it up, the more disturbed her friends became. Her brave face was too real for comfort. A/N: So what do you think? Still rather depressing I know...and the nightmare bit was rather cliche and cheesey even for me but hey...I figured some of you waiting for the romance side of things would appreciate the vague hints. I certainly hope so. Anyway, only three more depressing chapters to go, although I think I will give you a little taster of what will happen in the next chapter. Cos I'm nice like that. For me and Remus, this small, typical British village (which had hardly changed in the last two hundred years) was home. And for no matter reason for being here, it always would be. We made our way down the twisting road and the brook trickled along noisily to our left. We walked past the crumbling old muggle school and round another corner. “Goodnight,” I said hugging Remus particularly harder than the others. Lily and I walked up the drive and I fished my house keys out of my pocket. I sighed remembering how, a few weeks ago, I was in such a hurry to leave this place. And now, so soon after my desired escape, I was back again. Stuck right here in this place where everything was different but the same. At Hogwarts, my life was kind of the same. The everyday stuff hadn’t changed. Here though, the changes echoed through the house constantly and looking at the pictures of my mothers face, I couldn’t hide from it. I sat on my bed in the girl’s dormitory, flicking through the pages of witch weekly as I waited for my nails to dry. Hoping that distracting myself would work. I sighed and re-read the letter I had received this morning. Gloria, The funeral is on Tuesday. At All Saints church in the village. Dumbledore has given his permission for you to leave today. You may bring some friends with you if you wish. Hope your holding up okay. Will see you soon. Dad It was so cold. Everywhere I went I couldn’t get warm. It was like the chill in the air seemed to follow me around. The letter from my dad only reminded me of everything I had lost. I sighed and looked around. Did I want my friends there? Did I want them to see me cry, or possibly see me not cry? Yes. I want them there. I walked down the stairs trying to decide who to take. Not too many people. Remus would naturally already be going, as he’s known me and my family for as long as I can remember. I spot James and Sirius, realizing how much they mean to me. I want my family there with me. My surrogate family. “The funerals on Tuesday,” I say to them as I sit down watching their chess match. “Gloria-” they begin but I hold up my hand. “I’d really appreciate it if you could be there with me. Remus is already going, he’s like my brother but I need you too. And Lily. I need you all. Please come.” “Of course,” Sirius says, “When do we leave?” I smile hesitantly and feel soothed. I’ll be okay with my friends there. “Well, I’m leaving tonight, but you can come later if it’s too short notice.” “Nonsense!” James says loudly, brutally taking Sirius’ queen. Sirius swears loudly and they begin a heated argument about who was cheating. I sit there beside them, revelling in the fact that I have such fantastic friends. Their being themselves and at the moment that’s exactly what I need. Lily got out a bag and shoved a few days worth of clothes in it as Gloria did the same. She had gotten out of the hospital wing yesterday with no harm done; only a bruised ego. Rain hammered loudly against the castle and Lily grimaced at the sight of the heavy downpour. “So, where are we staying exactly?” Lily asked Gloria curiously. “At mine and Remus’ house. He lives in the village too so, you know, you’ll be with me and James and Sirius will be staying with Remus.” Lily smiled, “You’ve known Remus a long time haven’t you?” Gloria didn’t look up from her packing as she continued to speak. Instead she hurled random clothes in her suitcase without much thought as to what she was doing. “Yeah,” she answered, “I’ve known him since I was two. It used to be me, Remus and Giselle running around the village. And a few other kids obviously. We had our own little gang. Then we came here and well, all our muggle friends kind of, drifted from us.” She laughed and the memories seemed to make her eyes shine. “Those were the good old days,” she mumbled, “I have to see them, you know. All my old friends. They’ll be there at the funeral like they were at my mums. But they don’t really care. They always resented us after we left for Hogwarts. They knew we were keeping something from them.” Gloria smiled bitterly as she finished packing and sat on her bed. “It was never quite the same after that.” I walked with Sirius, James, Remus and Lily in the pouring rain. We each carried our bags as we walked down the grounds to the gates. Professor Dumbledore was there to open them. His eyes were full of sadness and I looked away. It was hard to look at them. The gates shut with a clanging noise behind us and we kept walking without looking back. Sirius glanced at me before sticking out his right hand. The knight bus appeared with a terrific band and we boarded quietly. I fell off my chair six times in ten minutes. “East Budleigh!” A voice yelled as the bus stopped suddenly. I laughed as James fell flat on his face against the window. Lily surprisingly helped him up and together we made our way down the road. I breathed in the night air full of joy and sadness as I looked around at the picturesque cottages, the towering church looming precariously over them. Flower pots crowded the cobbled street, bright colour bursting from every direction. There was no pavement, only a road and a cobblestone walking space. Lily, James and Sirius looked around in amazement as Remus and I walked ahead feeling comforted. For me and Remus, this small, typical British village (which had hardly changed in the last two hundred years) was home. And for no matter reason for being here, it always would be. We made our way down the twisting road and the brook trickled along noisily to our left. We walked past the crumbling old muggle school and round another corner. “Goodnight,” I said hugging Remus particularly harder than the others. Lily and I walked up the drive and I fished my house keys out of my pocket. I sighed remembering how, a few weeks ago, I was in such a hurry to leave this place. And now, so soon after my desired escape, I was back again. Stuck right here in this place where everything was different but the same. At Hogwarts, my life was kind of the same. The everyday stuff hadn’t changed. Here though, the changes echoed through the house constantly and looking at the pictures of my mothers face, I couldn’t hide from it. Stuck here in the place I used to call home, watching my father drink himself to death, I was lonely. But then, I realized as I walked up to my room, Lily following closely behind, I was lonely at Hogwarts too. This was the place where it all began. And now, seventeen years later; it was where it was coming to an end. I woke very early the next morning to the sound of Lily snuffling quietly in her sleep, red hair fanned out across her pillow as she snuggled into the duvet. The first few rays of light were beginning to stream through the curtains and I knew it was just after dawn. I hauled myself slowly out of bed and glanced at my reflection in the mirror on my bedroom wall. I looked both different and the same to the last time I had gazed into it. My hair was still black streaked with red. But my face looked odd. My eyes were blank. And as I crawled back onto my bed I found I felt that way too. I felt empty, like someone had come and rubbed me out with a giant eraser, taking away everything that was mine. Everything that made me up had just vanished. I felt tired, even though I had slept for days recently. But I guess it’s not my body that’s tired; it’s everything else. I feel emotionally exhausted. I want to go home, but I have no idea where that is. Technically I’m in it. But it doesn’t feel like home. I don’t feel like I have a home anymore. Home is where your family is. My mum died and now my sister has too. I don’t have a family; I don’t belong anywhere. I just exist. And it’s hard. Life shouldn’t be this hard. Mum and Giselle should still be here. I wish they were. The very sight of Gloria made Sirius’ heart wrench. She was dressed in a simple black dress that fell just above her knees. Her hair, normally fluttering freely in the wind was tied back away from her face. Her pale face, which looked so lost as she and Lily ventured up to the church. Sirius could see James struggling not to stare at Lily in appreciation, considering they were at a funeral. But the red head looked pretty. She wore a black skirt and blouse with a string of pearls around her neck and her shoes click clacked loudly on the cobblestones which seemed to embarrass her slightly, as though she thought it was insensitive. The church bells which usually sounded so cheerful droned desolately and seemed to be bringing tears to Remus’ eyes. Sirius put a hand on his shoulder as they went through the church doors; he knew how much Gloria’s family meant to him. Dad was drunk. I could see it immediately. His eyes were bloodshot and unfocused, his breath smelt of whisky. I felt angry. I did not hug him. He ignored me anyway, staring forlornly up at Giselle’s coffin like a lost puppy. I sat down in the front pew and clasped my hands tightly, biting my lip hard. The people filed in and Remus cried freely beside me. I held his hand and stared ahead. As the vicar started speaking about Giselle and her life I felt like screaming. He had always hated Giselle when we were children because she once trod on his flowers in the graveyard and now he was preaching at her funeral. The hypocrisy of it made me clench my teeth and the words I longed to shout at him stuck painfully in my throat. I could see James, Sirius and Lily on my other side, heads bowed respectfully. Dad looked ready to pass out as he clutched at a small canister in his pocket, obviously longing to take a swig or two. Remus clenched my hand and I knew it probably hurt, but I couldn’t feel the pain. I only felt angry. And when that passed, as we stood outside lowering Giselle’s coffin into the ground beside my mother, I simply felt nothing at all. James had his arm around Gloria’s shoulders and Remus cried freely on Lily’s shoulder, sobbing hysterically into her flame red hair. Sirius stood in between Remus and Gloria staring at the ground respectively. James could see exactly what was going on in his head; Sirius had never been to a funeral before and he obviously found the grief so freely expressed unnerving. Having no relationship except hatred with his family he had no idea what it would feel like to lose them. To feel Remus and Gloria’s pain at the loss of their family. And behind his eyes James could see him itching to comfort Gloria in some way; she looked so small standing there in her black dress with eyes staring blankly out at the world. He looked around biting his lip; noticing some muggle teens around their age giving them strange looks. Distrustful looks. Gloria looked at him as he squeezed her closer to him and in her eyes James saw everything. Gloria was falling; and he wondered just how long it would be until she finally hit the bottom. They watched them; the group of teenagers who belonged to something that they had never been privy to. The two familiar ones; they had blocked them out; lied, decided that they could not share whatever secrets they had. Every year, since the age of eleven they had disappeared and refused to tell them where they went. They knew they went to a boarding school; but there was so much more to it than that. Gloria Middleton stood quietly surrounded by what they supposed were her friends. Looking closely they noticed that Remus Lupin stood among them, crying hysterically. There were two other boys, one had messy black hair and glasses and had his arm around Gloria’s shoulders, the other who was taller and insanely handsome, stood with his grey eyes staring respectively at the ground. One of his hands was clasping Gloria’s tightly. The boy with the glasses looked across at them and frowned. As though suggesting that they had no right to be here. They did not belong at this service. They did not belong in Gloria’s life. A tall strikingly beautiful girl with long red hair stood beside Remus with one arm around him and the other hand on the taller boys shoulder. They were all intertwined together. They were a defined group and it rekindled bitter feelings in the teenagers of East Budleigh, who would never understand exactly why she and Remus had never trusted them. Nobody had secrets in East Budleigh. But theirs had wedged a gap full of resentment until there was nothing left. There was no friendship to salvage. They pretended to be sorry, they pretended they cared; but to be perfectly honest, Gloria Middleton and Remus Lupin were hated by their past friends, but they hated the two boys and the flame haired girl more because they were part of the world they were never allowed into. I can see them. Sarah, Michael, Jordan, Hannah and Becky. Our past friends. Pretending to be sorry that I have lost everything. Sarah looks smug as she wraps her arms around Jordan, her blonde hair flowing freely as she laughs over by the tombstones at the crumbling church wall; she never did forgive me for going to Hogwarts. Michael refuses to look directly at me but I caught his eye once and he flinched before glaring at James. Lily fidgeted uncomfortably with her blouse holding James arm, seemingly afraid he will go over and give them all a piece of his mind. Remus is receiving hostile looks from Hannah; she used to have a crush on him as I remember but the two of us disappearing off to boarding school for most of the year turned her against us; convinced that I was stealing him away from her. Becky, god she looks exactly the same; blue eyes, brown hair, I can’t believe she used to be my best friend. I guess she never called me names. But it hurt her that I could not tell her where it was Remus and I disappeared to. She could never understand how much it hurt me to be who I was and lose all my friends. We started out as kids and I suppose that’s why it worked. But then as I got older I realized that I was a witch, and they were muggles. And as much as I loved them I belonged in a different world. And I think maybe they hate us now, because they thought we chose our heritage. They think we choose our world over them. But what they always failed to understand; was that it was never a choice. It was just who we are. A/N: Well another chapter up; only one more kinda sad chapter to go before things start looking up a bit. And I can promise that there will be a fight! Would you like a preview? Well here it is- Next time on Cursed: “God Becky don’t tell me you actually still care about these two! Jordan, I think you should finish him.” Sirius saw James stiffen and Remus looked down coldly at his former friends. “Get Gloria,” James muttered at Lily and gently disengaged her hand from his arm. “Wha-“ “You always were a wanker Jordan.” Said Remus and Sirius felt his grip suddenly disappear. He roared and leapt for the arrogant boy in front of him fist raised. Lily shrieked and darted around the fight starting. Remus and James glanced at each other briefly before lunging after Sirius. “What the hell do you think you’re doing dad?” Sirius awoke to the sounds of slightly muffled angry yelling. He opened his eyes blearily to see Lily standing in Remus’ bedroom. Wearing quite a short nightie. “Bloody hell!” Said James from the pullout sofa. Remus seemed to be pulling on a jacket over his pyjamas, Sirius scrambled out of his made up bed of quilts on the floor still feeling half asleep. “Don’t you dare speak to me that way you little brat! Did I ask you to come down here in the dead of night? No! Just GO away you- stupid girl!” “What the fuck is going on?” asked Sirius drowsily but rapidly waking up more with each angry scream that reached his ears. The distinctive sound of shattering glass reached theirs ears and judging by Mr Middleton’s angry cursing, Gloria had thrown a glass at him. “Please,” Lily begged looking panicked, dragging on James’ arm to get him out of the duvet, “you have to stop it! I didn’t know what else to do!” Sirius scrambled hurriedly upright, grabbed his wand and James reached desperately for his glasses as Lily tried to drag them from the room. “Hang on Lily!” James called and Sirius threw a large hoodie at him which he pulled over the top of lily’s head. “You’re drunk you stupid bastard! I hate you-” Gloria’s scream of fury was cut off suddenly and there was the sound of chairs being knocked over followed closely by a loud thump. “Oh my god,” Remus breathed as they dashed down the stairs and out the back door, “he’s done something stupid!” Lily gasped and clung onto James hand as the sprinted up the road to Gloria’s house. Sirius hastily tucked his wand into his jeans as he noticed the crowd of muggles gathered around the house. A group of kids about theirs own age stood clustered particularly close to the front door and they seemed to be debating amongst themselves. “Gloria! Gloria don’t be angry at me!” came the drunken cries of her father, “please don’t be angry at me, you know I can’t bear it!” “Move out the way!” Remus snarled at the girl closest to the door. She jumped back hesitantly while her friends adopted hostile looks. “Stop it Dad! Please just stop! I can’t deal with this anymore!” “Well well, Remus Lupin, and who do we have here? A red head and two morons. How delightful. You seem to have acquired a taste for those as uncivilised as yourself. Clearly wherever you’ve been has poor standards.” “I don’t know who the ruddy hell you are,” Sirius growled, “and I sure as hell don’t care, but if you don’t move in the next five seconds you’re going to find out how ‘uncivilised’ I can really be.” The boy smirked and folded his arms aggressively, determinedly not moving. Sirius snarled and lunged towards him but was suddenly held back by a strong arm. “Jordan,” Remus said through gritted teeth, holding Sirius back with difficulty, “move. You have no idea what you’re doing. Pull you’re head out you’re arse before I let Sirius do it for you.” A brown haired girl fidgeted uncomfortably behind the boy called Jordan and glanced back uncertainly towards the house where once again drunken shouts and angry yelling could be heard. “Please,” Lily said stepping forward to the girl, “You used to be friends with her. Can’t you see she needs us right now?” She looked down apparently ashamed and another girl gave a cruel laugh before pushing her aside. “God Becky don’t tell me you actually still care about these two! Jordan, I think you should finish him.” Sirius saw James stiffen and Remus looked down coldly at his former friends. “Get Gloria,” James muttered at Lily and gently disengaged her hand from his arm. “Wha-“ “You always were a wanker Jordan.” Said Remus and Sirius felt his grip suddenly disappear. He roared and leapt for the arrogant boy in front of him fist raised. Lily shrieked and darted around the fight starting. Remus and James glanced at each other briefly before lunging after Sirius. She ran through the remaining crowd with difficulty as they were gathering close to watch the fight. Lily looked back to see that another boy had joined the punch up. “Oh no you don’t!” The blonde girl from before had yanked the hood of James’ sweater and was attempting to pull her back. “What the hell are you doing?!” Lily screeched wrenching herself free. Another girl appeared and attempted to stop her from gaining access to the door. “Do you honestly think, that after six years of waiting for this moment we are going to let Gloria Middleton have help?!” she hissed. Lily stared at her in disgust. Really what kind of friends were these people? She clenched her fist and brought it swinging wildly towards the girls face but before she’d even so much as touched her the girl let out a shriek of pain and was yanked backwards. A face appeared behind her with brown hair and blue eyes. “Jesus Hannah do you ever stop talking?” the girl called Becky asked, nodding at Lily, who swung around, punched the blonde girl in the face and ran for it. She burst through the kitchen door and it was even worse than when she had left it. There was shattered glass and broken plates all over the floor and crouched in the corner was Gloria’s father, stone cold drunk and crying feebly. She ignored him and rushed into the hall and up the stairs. There were smashing sounds coming from the locked bathroom door. “Gloria?” Lily called gently, “Come out. The boys are just uh-handling…things outside. We’re going to take you home.” Gloria emerged holding a wet flannel to her head and Lily steered her firmly into their bedroom. She flicked her wand and two suitcases flew open. Gloria started seizing random objects from around her room and stuffing them in her suitcase. She hesitated before pulling a brick in her wall loose and bringing out a small wooden box. She placed it in the bag with utmost care. “Are you ready?” Lily asked softly. Gloria looked around at her room taking in the one vibrant raspberry wall and the three gentle cream ones. Muggle rock posters, childhood pictures and photographs were haphazardly stuck to the walls. The wizarding certificates and posters and photo’s waved at her cheerily not knowing that she was never coming back. The Gryffindors banner above her head and the drawings and signs made for quidditch matches over the last six years hung limply. Gloria took one last look at it al, her eyes hard and nodded. They rushed out the door and down the stairs and Lily noticed that not once did she look back. As they entered the kitchen Gloria’s father sobbed harder than ever and attached himself to her ankle. Gloria pointed her wand at him ruthlessly and he was sent flying backwards. “Goodbye Daddy,” she said reverting back to her eleven year old self, who had once stood here, so long ago now and kissed him goodbye before going to Hogwarts for the first time. Gloria closed her eyes at the memory and for a moment she was lost in it. “Hurry up Glory! Dad’s about to leave for work and Mum’s packing the trunks in the car!” She threw herself back down the stairs with Pudding in her basket and pulled on the sweater as Remus emerged from the kitchen carrying something wrapped in tinfoil. “Bye Daddy!” Gloria said throwing my arms around him as he planted a kiss on her forehead. He hugged Giselle and ruffled Remus’ hair affectionately before disapparating with a loud crack. The three children jumped as Gloria’s Mum started the car and they ran out to the driveway. Remus and Gloria clambered in the back and Giselle settled down in the front next to her mother. And then Lily was pulling her the by the hand out the front door and they were pushing through a stunned crowd. Five boys were fighting ruthlessly. “James!” Lily cried and he disentangled himself from the mob with one last kick. Sirius and Remus soon followed and the two muggle boys glared at them with hatred, all looking worse for wear. “Let’s go,” Said James grabbing Lily and Gloria and marching off down the street. Remus and Sirius followed, one of them limping slightly. They rounded a corner and James turned on the spot, the three of them disapparating with a loud crack. Remus and Sirius did the same. I woke up in a warm bed smothered by many blankets and head rested on several sinfully soft pillows. I blinked blearily and looked around. The room was dark and I could make out the figures of at least one person curled up at the end of my bed. Through a crack in the curtains was enough moonlight for me to catch a glimpse of Lily’s red hair falling across James’ shoulders on some kind of sofa thing. I lay quietly in the dark listening to them breathing and savouring the fact that I still had my friends. For now at least. But I’m scared all the time that I’m going to loose one of them. I feel like I’m a walking time bomb, just waiting to see which of the people I care about are going to be buried next. Whose funeral will I be attending next time? Who else that I’m close to is going to be taken away from me? But I close my eyes and slowly fall asleep because I can’t push back this fear. It won’t go away. She was alone in the dark. Hiding from everything because it would never stop searching for her. The eyes of red malice slid over her again and again, but each time lingering by her just a bit longer. She could hear the hissing of snakes nearby and was very afraid. She bit her lip to keep from crying aloud in alarm as they came slithering towards her, coils of blackness edging closer and closer because they could smell her. She staggered backwards but ended up where she began and then there was suddenly one round her leg and her arms and the red eyes stopped searching; fixed on her face. They loomed closer and closer and Gloria saw slit like nostrils thrown into contrast even though there was no light, only black, black everywhere- “I can see you,” the face hissed as the snakes bound and tugged and squeezed her. Gloria gasped out for breath struggling, trying, desperately, to free herself. “I see you everywhere, wherever you go. You cannot hide from me, not anywhere, not ever. I will find you. Just like I found you’re sister. She tried to hide from me Gloria. And you…. will end up. Just. Like. Her.” Gloria shivered at the thought that he knew her name. And she knew that this was the monster that had killed her sister. “What do you want from me?” She managed to choke out as she gasped for breath. Pale spider like fingers grasped her throat and instantly the snakes slithered to the ground, snapping hungrily at her heels which were hovering a foot above the ground. “The end.” He hissed menacingly and pressed his fingers down hard. And Gloria was choking. Choking to death in her dream. In her sleep. Only this wasn’t a normal dream, was it? “Gloria! Gloria mum says breakfast is ready.” It grew lighter and her eyelids fluttered. Faces were appearing blurrily but the red eyes did not falter. “Do not fight me Gloria. You will lose everything.” “Gloria!” A hand slapped her hard and she triumphantly woke, escaping the spider like hands and red eyes. She sat up and found herself lying in a large cushy bed. Remus was curled sleepily on the end beside Sirius who was awake and yawning. Lily lay sprawled on her stomach over the sofa under a thick blanket, undoubtedly put there by James, who was standing in front of her and had his hand on her shoulder. “Finally,” he said in a low voice, “you’re awake. My mum wants to see you and Sirius can’t wait to get tucked into the pancakes before we leave.” “Leave?” she asked feeling disorientated, “where are we?” Sirius stretched and pulled on a jumper, his hair looking ruffled and his eyes full of sleep. “You alright?” he asked Gloria sat up and her stomach grumbled. She couldn’t help grinning at the look on James’ face as the sound reached his ears. “Someone is clearly also in dire need of pancakes.” He said, “and we’re at my house sleepyhead. You pretty much conked out last night as soon as we disapparated.” Gloria almost sagged back into the pillows in relief. Right now she was exhausted. The smell of pancakes reached her nostrils and she sniffed greedily. She got up and pulled on a sweater following the boys downstairs. She was hungry and tired and scared. But she would think about it later. She would take things one step at a time instead of letting it overwhelm her. That, she realized was her problem. She felt too much at once. She loved too hard. She grieved dangerously. She would examine it bit by bit. Slowly get past it. Through it. And she was starting with Mrs Potter’s pancakes. A/n: Well, there was the punch up as promised. Not a lot of detail, but still, I hope you liked it. Anyway I suppose this chapter was a bit dramatic but I still rather like it. Next chapter...would you like a sneak peak? Well here it is anyway, the first reasonably happy chapter in the story. We were interrupted suddenly by James who appeared out of nowhere over the back of the sofa and landed painfully on my legs. “OWWWW!” I screeched playfully and writhed so we all toppled over on the floor. I landed with a painful thump on my backside but James ended up on top of Lily. She didn’t slap him either but just laughed at him. “Are you going to get off me at any point?” she asked playfully. “Well…..” He murmured appearing to think about it, “No.” They both giggled and I raised my eyebrows. I heard a snort to my left and turned to see Sirius grinning mischievously. “Guys get a room,” he said and pulled me to my feet. I laughed and turned to find James glaring at us. “What?” asked Sirius noticing the glare, “I was just stating what everyone else is thinking!” Lily shoved James from behind and giggled as he flopped on the floor. She stood up and brushed off her robes. “That reminds me James, we’re going to have a Christmas ball and as head boy and girl we need to go and plan it.” I spluttered with laughter and Sirius grinned like the cat that’s got the cream. “Getting told to go get a room reminds you of you’re head duties? Whatever do you and Prongs here get up to I wonder?” Lily blushed furiously and aimed a smack at Sirius’ head. “Shut up!” she said laughingly and Sirius hoisted her over his shoulders. James and I collapsed with the giggles as Lily attempted to beat Sirius while hanging upside down. She ended up with her head hanging by his arse. “You know, “she said in an amused voice from behind her hair looking at Sirius’ behind, “the quidditch practise really does show.” James spluttered indignantly and Sirius turned around, making Lily vanish from view. “Don’t take it personally Prongs; my buttocks are just naturally irresistible. Lily can’t help it if she’s not blind enough to realize that there is absolutely no competition.” “Gosh Sirius and that didn’t sound at all conceited,” I said and Lily snorted. When we got back to Hogwarts everyone settled back into their normal routines. Most days I found I could put on a brave face and settle into a routine in which I just got through the day. Sometimes it became too much and I would quietly go and cry in the girls toilets. I refrained from breaking anymore mirrors though. Lily and I got onto the quidditch team. The weather got colder and ice descended. September and October passed into wintry November. “Hey,” said Lily flopping down on the sofa beside me and picking up my copy of COSMOWITCH. She flicked through it as I finished my transfiguration essay. “So how was Charms club?” I asked as I put down my quill and settled more comfortably on the sofa. Lily grinned. “It was cool; I was teaching summoning charms to first years! It’s quite fun really. Flitwick says I could teach when I get my NEWTS done. Isn’t that great?” “Yeah,” I agreed amicably and fished a few chocolate frogs out of my bag, “But would you? Teach I mean?” Lily considered it a moment before shaking her head. “Nah, too much stick.” We were interrupted suddenly by James who appeared out of nowhere over the back of the sofa and landed painfully on my legs. “OWWWW!” I screeched playfully and writhed so we all toppled over on the floor. I landed with a painful thump on my backside but James ended up on top of Lily. She didn’t slap him either but just laughed at him. “Are you going to get off me at any point?” she asked playfully. “Well…..” He murmured appearing to think about it, “No.” They both giggled and I raised my eyebrows. I heard a snort to my left and turned to see Sirius grinning mischievously. “Guys get a room,” he said and pulled me to my feet. I laughed and turned to find James glaring at us. “What?” asked Sirius noticing the glare, “I was just stating what everyone else is thinking!” Lily shoved James from behind and giggled as he flopped on the floor. She stood up and brushed off her robes. “That reminds me James, we’re going to have a Christmas ball and as head boy and girl we need to go and plan it.” I spluttered with laughter and Sirius grinned like the cat that’s got the cream. “Getting told to go get a room reminds you of you’re head duties? Whatever do you and Prongs here get up to I wonder? Lily blushed furiously and aimed a smack at Sirius’ head. “Shut up!” she said laughingly and Sirius hoisted her over his shoulders. James and I collapsed with the giggles as Lily attempted to beat Sirius while hanging upside down. She ended up with her head hanging by his arse. “You know, “she said in an amused voice from behind her hair looking at Sirius’ behind, “the quidditch practise really does show." James spluttered indignantly and Sirius turned around, making Lily vanish from view. “Don’t take it personally Prongs; my buttocks are just naturally irresistible. Lily can’t help it if she’s not blind enough to realize that there is absolutely no competition.” “Gosh Sirius and that didn’t sound at all conceited,” I said and Lily snorted. Sirius got the familiar manic look in his eye and James glanced at me. “You’d best run for it Glory,” he said as Sirius carefully placed Lily back on her own two feet and advanced towards us. “Oh shit,” I ran towards the portrait hole dragging James with me, hearing Sirius’ heavy footfalls behind us as we burst past the portrait of the fat lady, giggling inanely. Our laughter echoed all around the corridors and people glanced at us in amusement and exasperation as the four of us sprinted through the castle. Lily was shouting at Sirius and James and I were running hand in hand anywhere, determined to outrun our two friends. We saw Remus with Peter looking confused as he saw us racing past him gasping with laughter. “Hurry up James!” I screamed looking back at Sirius who was gaining on us looking triumphant. “Fuck!” We ran down the marble staircase, three at a time, stumbling slightly, hearing Lily’s laughter behind us as she and Sirius followed. It was an entertaining chase and I felt high as a kite as James and I forced the front doors open and raced out into the rain. It was tipping it down and we were drenched within five feet of the castle but we ran on, slipping and sliding on the soaked grass. “Boll-“ James tumbled to the ground in a spectacular skid, almost pulling me down with him as he slid through the mud. I heard Lily pounce on him and I threw a handful of mud at her, hearing James’ agonised shouts as she tickled him. SPLAT It hit Lily on the side of the face and Sirius glared at me evilly. “You shouldn’t muck around with mud Gloria,” he growled edging closer, “unless you want to play dirty.” I fought hard to keep a straight face as I replied. “Oh I think I do,” I said coolly and Sirius just about managed to hold back his laughter. “Really?” he asked and quick as a flash of lightening he stooped and drew a handful of mud from a lake of it at his feet. It hit me hard. “Alright Mr Perfectly chiselled arse! You want a piece of me-Come get it!” Sirius pounced and I collapsed under his weight shrieking as I fell face first into mud. There was a short scuffle in which Sirius got a slightly bruised nose and my hips were severely squashed by his heavy weight. “Give up Middleton?” He whispered devilishly in my ear but then there was a loud thump as James came plying into us, glasses askew, mud-bespattered and tackled Sirius, wrenching him off me. And then Lily appeared out of nowhere and suddenly we were all fighting each other, mud flying everywhere, going in our hair and eyes and mouths and we were all laughing. It turned out as Sirius and I against Lily and James but at the very end we all turned on Sirius. Lightening flashed in the sky and we lay panting for breath in the mud looking up at the clouds, at the rain which was still pouring heavily onto us. I opened my mouth and let the water fall into it, remembering when Giselle and I used to do so as little girls. I blinked heavily, willing myself not to go to pieces over a mere memory when I’d just had so much fun, for the first time in months. Eventually we got up when the storm’s intensity increased until it was dangerous to be outside any longer. We traipsed up to the castle, filthy and dripping. Mrs Norris was onto us in an instant, mewing at us and Sirius grabbed my hand as we started running again. “Hurry up!” he barked at me and I gasped with laughter again, which in turn set of Lily and James, who were slightly behind us. Sirius shook his head snorting as we pounded down the charms corridor. I heard Filch’s familiar wheezing getting closer and suddenly Sirius wrenched me behind a tapestry and I got a glimpse of James and Lily passing us, dripping everywhere as they skidded round a corridor. We waited, squished together in the incredibly confined space listening to Filch wheeze his arthritic way past us. I started to giggle again and Sirius clamped a hand around my mouth and an arm round my waist from behind; holding me still as I was racked with a fit of entirely silent laughter. Filch’s footsteps had halted however and it was a tense but extremely funny moment of hardly daring to breathe before they suddenly started up again. As soon as he was out of ear shot Sirius started laughing too and we poked out heads round from the tapestry, before climbing out of our hidey-hole and dashing away from the spot in the opposite direction still hooting with laughter. “Where’ve Lily and James gone?” I panted as we sneaked our way up to the third floor. “Prefects bathroom?” he suggested, drawing to a stop behind a large suit of armour. “Nah, that’s all the way down on the ground floor, off near the kitchens isn’t it? Near the Hufflepuff common room.” Sirius shrugged and took my wrist, edging down the corridor. We were almost round the corner when we heard footsteps and I yanked him back in a crevice behind a statue. He yelped and that was it, we both started snorting loudly. But it was only Lily and James, breathless and still dripping. On meeting our gaze we all got the giggles and Lily, despite being soaked to the skin and having mud on her face looked prettier than ever. “Well ladies,” said Sirius, “I think we could do with a bit of a wash don’t you?” James snorted and I felt the corners of my mouth twitch into a smile. The others were filthy and I realized I probably didn’t look much better. Somehow though, instead of being disgusting, it was rather funny. We all started walking and it was then that I realized I had no idea where we were. Neither apparently, did James. “Oi where are we going?” Sirius grinned at us and I felt myself beaming back despite the fact that I was now starting to shiver. “For a bath,” he answered and Lily glanced at me before we both burst into quiet giggles. James was now looking excited and rather white under all the mud, he too was trembling; he wrapped an arm around Lily and Sirius, catching sight of me shivering, draped his arm around my shoulders. “Courtesy of the Prefects bathroom?” James asked to no one in particular. I felt rather than saw Sirius grin and with my friends, I felt truly, blissfully happy. Then we rounded the corner and the torches went out. I felt Sirius’ grip on me tighten and his shoulders tense. I half glanced over my shoulder and saw James fumble for his wand and then I remembered with a jolt we’d left them abandoned in the common room. “Well well,” said a silky voice, “Whatever do we have here?” A bright light was suddenly illuminated and it stung my eyes as I squinted beyond it into the darkness. Severus Snape was stood before us, smirking maliciously, a large group of thickset Slytherin’s behind him. But that wasn’t what made my heart sink. They all had their wands drawn and each looked ready to curse us into oblivion. A/n: well here it finally is, as promised. A chapter full of fun, flirtation and a little hint of danger. I wonder how its going to end ;P No seriously, I haven't even started the next chapter yet. And perhaps now all the depressive stuff is kind of out of the way...perhaps I can finally set the James/Lily ball rolling. Lily wasn’t sure how she and James ended up in the chandelier. One minute they were faced with an angry horde of murderous looking Slytherins and the next they were twenty feet off the ground perched on a highly uncomfortable twisted pole of silver. If either of them moved even the slightest bit, the shards of crystal approximately the size of her fist dangling from the pole she was sitting on would start to jingle together, completely giving away their position. As it was she was trying not to squirm; there was a huge black eight-legged thing that may once have been a tarantula in the centre of the chandelier; it was wrapped up in a nest of ropey cobwebs and Lily had no desire to find out whether it was still alive. She glanced at James who was looking slightly green under all the mud and leaning away from the spider with a horrified expression. She had to fight the mad desire to giggle. Especially when she caught sight of the huge gash on his cheek made by Severus Snape. It was bleeding horrendously and droplets were falling onto her hand. His blood was still warm but it worried her. Without a wand she could not heal him and there was no way they could go to the Hospital Wing. She turned her attention to the corridor below where a group of five menacing looking Slytherins were stalking along, wands raised threateningly. Lily stopped wondering how they were possibly going to get down when she caught sight of the expressions on their faces. They frankly made her want to hide up there for a good while longer. Lily glanced again at the blood dripping down James’ face and thought inexplicitly of Gloria as she’d last seen her; white-faced and wide eyed, staring in horror at the oncoming Slytherins as James dragged her up a hidden staircase concealed by a tapestry. As if sensing her thoughts James tentatively reached over and grasped her wrist; he looked worried too. His eyes were wide and dark behind his glasses, which were slightly lopsided where he had fallen earlier. Silently, he put his finger to his lips and motioned to the ground where the last two Slytherins were disappearing around the corner leading onto the fourth floor. No, Lily mouthed at him, gripping the chandelier until her knuckles turned white and wincing as her finger got entangled in a rope of cobweb. Out of the corner of her eye she thought she saw the spider-shaped thing twitch. Do you want to be stuck here all night?! James demanded silently indicating with various wild arm movements that they should make a run for it. The chandelier wobbled ominously and Lily glared at him. James desisted. A thick black pincer started to click. Well I’m going, he mouthed, and if you ever want to get down from here you’ll have to come with me. Lily felt like cursing him then and there; what kind of choice was that?! She glanced nervously down at the ground and felt the cobweb around her hand start to pull against her skin. James gave a strangled yell; she snapped her head up to look at him to find a great black hairy eight-legged object flying directly at her. She screamed, overbalanced as she instinctively leant back and felt someone tug at her wrist. James yanked her off the chandelier as he jumped and Lily tumbled after him feeling the spider’s legs graze the top of her head. She screamed as they fell; James had grabbed hold of the chandelier and used it to swing himself (and Lily) over to a towering statue of Eurich the Evil. They landed on the top of his head about ten feet down; James landed on his feet in a light crouch about ten feet down and then slammed into the black marble as Lily flew into his back. She spat hair out of her mouth; already she could hear the rapidly approaching footsteps of the Slytherins returning and started to wriggle down the back of the statue, James scrambling down behind her cursing under his breath. Her feet hit the floor. Lily resisted the urge to let her knees buckle and pelted down the corridor, James two steps behind her as the Slytherin’s pelted round the corner. “There they are!” Someone yelled and Lily winced, praying to God that they would get through the night without waking up half the castle, let alone McGonagall. And she hoped that Sirius and Gloria, wherever they were, were having better luck then she and James. As it turned out, Sirius and Gloria were not having better luck. In fact, neither of them were together so they were actually having just as bad a night separately. Having punched Snivellus in his sallow hook-nosed face, Sirius had made a run for it- in the confusion of the flashing lights, muffled yells and people running Gloria, James and Lily had vanished. So now he was making his hurried way along the sixth floor hoping to God he could lose the idiots on his trail. And that he would be able to find one of his friends soon- maybe they’d all be waiting in the common room by the time he got there. Although his stomach wouldn’t stop squirming as he remembered James’ blood spurting everywhere from a disgustingly deep gash forming down the side of his face… Sirius ducked into an empty Arithmacy classroom as the heavy footsteps behind him got closer; closing the door behind him he darted over to the other side of the room and threw himself into an open cupboard, slamming the door shut behind him. He stared through a crack in the door, barely daring to breathe. His heartbeat thundered traitorously loud; surely it would give him away to the morons following him? And while Sirius wasn’t exactly afraid of them, he had enough rational thought to recognise despite being the better dueller, the better thinker and the better looking, without a wand that would not make much difference. And the better looking thing would be gone in an instant under the influence of nasty dark magic. So to protect himself, his friends (once he actually found them) and his face, it would be better to avoid a confrontation. You know; kill his pride to live another day? Something like that. He never was one to pay attention to Remus’ longwinded philosophical speeches about humanity; it was generally more kind to in regard to what was left of his sanity to just nod and smile kindly while idly dreaming of what might be for lunch or girls in very naughty knickers. He was drawn out of his thoughts as something rustled by his foot and he jerked violently against the wall of the cabinet, making the many essays on the shelf above his head shudder ominously. Swearing under his breath, he bent down to investigate, just as two Slytherin’s swept stealthily into the room, wands held aloft. If it had been Gloria in his place, she no doubt would have seen a resemblance to James Bond in their stance and killer-spy poses but Sirius, not being muggleborn could only wonder when Elias Reede and Lysander Eastwood had become poufs, as he stared at them in bewilderment through the crack in the cabinet door. The thing that had rustled before suddenly jerked considerably more violently and something pointy grazed Sirius’ leg. Elias and Lysander looked around sharply. He swallowed nervously and crouched down, peering over at the black space next to him which looked vaguely like some kind of box…. “Oh,” he said, somehow sounding strangely calm, “Fuck.” From where Gloria was hiding in a giant black china vase that may have once spawned the devil’s offspring, in some weird medieval ritual (the rusty red stains splattered over the inside of it looked highly suspicious) she heard something other than the sound of heavy Slytherin’s footsteps trying to inconspicuously thunder past. For a moment she thought it might just be the sound of ineptitude; I mean honestly, did these morons know anything about sneaking and stalking prey? She had a feeling the word ‘stealthy’ should be applied with that concept but after weighing the pro’s and con’s of the Slytherin’s attitude to hunting decided to keep her mouth shut. Being able to hear them was after all, she reminded herself as the Marauder half of her brain sighed in disappointment, actually to her advantage. So crouching down and trying not to look to look too closely at her hiding place, she thought she might be imagining things when she heard a barely audible bang. Summoning her courage she stood up on tiptoe and peered over the rim of the vase. Her eyes were met with a deserted corridor- the Slytherin’s had just rounded the corner (she could hear them marching out onto the marble staircase, no doubt moving up to the next floor) – when a high pitched mischievous chuckle reached her ears. It was quiet, which meant it was far away, but even as she registered this, more chuckles reached her ears, nearer this time and her heart almost vomited itself out of her mouth. Her worst fears were confirmed when the Slytherin’s footsteps suddenly halted and then, with the speed of lightening started pounding back in her direction. She had no time to hide and it didn’t matter. They stormed past looking hysterical. One of them even displayed a primitive sense of humanity (it happened occasionally, maybe every ten years or so) and managed to scream at her as he pelted past “RUUUUUNNNN!” Then they were gone and something blue glinted at the edge of her vision from where the Slytherin’s had just appeared. She heard a single evil chuckle and toppled out of the vase as a swarm of electric blue suddenly rounded the corner, maniacal laughter echoing up and down the corridor. Gloria scrambled to her feet and ran, her hair coming dangerously close to catching fire as the brackets lining the walls, fireworks, chalk and for some odd reason- Mrs Norris, were hurled at her from the air. She ripped aside a tapestry not long after and tore up the secret staircase behind it, covered in chalk, her arm stinging from multiple scratches and cursing the fool who had unleashed the swarm of Unspeakably Apocalyptic Evil upon the castle. This really is the top of my five worst nights in Hogwarts, James thought as he pounded down the marble staircase, three at a time, Lily hot on his heels. Really all we need now is Moaning Myrtle hitting on me, an army of pissed off Salamanders chasing us and for the Entrance Hall to flood for tonight to qualify as the worst night in the history of mankind. They had reached the second floor and James sprinted over to one of the random bookcases outside the classrooms; he squeezed under the middle one and shoved aside the loose bricks revealing the hidden passage behind; the hole he had uncovered would be eyelevel with anyone stood in the passage. “Get in,” He snapped, as he crawled through the hole and slithered feet first to the floor. A blur of red hair got about halfway through when it was yanked suddenly back. “Lily!” He called, jumping up to grab her wrist and prevent her being hauled up to the ceiling by her ankles. “Pull harder!” She yelled a bite of impatience in her voice. He almost expected her to look terrified; instead her face was contorted with poorly repressed fury which filled him with undignified relief. An outraged Lily, enraged at being covered in dried mud, assaulted by a giant spider and being hoisted into the air by her skinny ankles was one he could deal with. James pulled as hard as he could and Lily tumbled through the hole and landed on top of him. He heard the bricks shuffle themselves back into place as something unmistakably huge thundered against where the hole was supposed to be. Everything went worryingly dark; he heard Lily breathing heavily on top of him, her hipbones digging into him and his mind started doing the conga as he realized this. Perhaps tonight won’t be so bad after all…. He took the opportunity to intertwine his fingers in her long beautiful hair but Lily appeared not to notice; instead she had spluttered into incoherent, furious speech. “Who the fuck,” she demanded, her voice shaking, “Would be stupid enough…” “Shh,” James whispered soothingly, inching his face closer to hers in the darkness. “…to let loose at least five crates worth of Cornish Pixies?!” James froze, lips inches away from hers as Lily’s words suddenly hit him with the force of a speeding bullet- or at least a very small train. On second thought- we’re buggered. If, in the future (assuming humanity survived after tonight of course) he was asked exactly why he thought setting free two crates worth of Cornish Pixies was a good idea, Sirius knew he would never be able to answer. At the time, he remembered, it had seemed like one of those ideas that to most people would seem insane, but to him had the appearance (once he got past the panic, or maybe it was the panic that made him do it) of being a Brilliant Plan. One of those plans, where its just so crazy, so suicidal and self-sacrificing that it couldn’t possibly work but the sadistic rules of the universe indicated that it therefore had to work. Now he was beginning to realize that this wasn’t one of those times. As he ducked behind a battered suit of armour covered from head to toe in soot and pickles frogs brains (mixing pixies and the supply cupboard of the dungeons was never going to turn out well) he bitterly argued with himself that it had at first, worked out beautifully. He had burst out the cupboard, startling Elias and Lysander so badly that they hadn’t had the presence of mind to raise their wands, which was exactly what he had predicted. They’d never stood a chance against the pixies, which he was thinking of dubbing ‘death on wings’, since both boys had been seized by their ears, and Sirius had the uncomfortable notion that they could well be hanging from the Astronomy Tower by now. And he still hadn’t seen hide or hair of James, Gloria or Lily. This worried him. And Sirius did not like to be worried. It made his hair frizz and having frizzed hair was not good for ones reputation. He would become like Sadie Radcliff; a girl who’s upper body was obscured by a long poodle-like nest of frizzy auburn hair. And he wasn’t sure, but he thought he may have once glimpsed a frizzy auburn monobrow too. I mean there were rumours that her hair ate people! Sirius tried to make his breathing return to normal; hyperventilating wasn’t good for him either. Summoning his remaining courage, he dived back out into the open, dodging bombs of beatles eyes, mouldy green cheese (the bad kind of mould, not the good) and a screaming Slytherin being dragged into the shadows by their ankles. No, thought Sirius, jumping over the boys madly scrabbling hands, which were attempting to pry themselves onto anything that may save him- including Sirius- This has definitely not been one of my better ideas. A/n: Well this has definately been one of my sillier chapters. In fact I think its probably the silliest thing I've ever written *draws herself up proudly* but what the hell. This story has been so gloomy for so long that it feels good to write something so- well- random I suppose. Something that isn't doom and gloom. I feel better having written this and I sincerely hope you enjoy this little update of general silliness and fun and mayhem. But let me know yeah? What would you like to happen next? Feel free to tell me, because not only has it taken me MONTHS to finish this chapter, I haven't started the second part yet. So an update could take awhile...but on the brightside if you have any little requests they may just be written in especially for you <3 Because I'm lovely like that. lots of love That crazy ol' Duckling http://www.harrypotterfanfiction.com |