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It's Not Love by dreamer21
Chapter 3: A Father Who Cares And A Long Drive Into The Rain
A/N: Hey guys, this is my first fanfiction ever. I really hope it turns out well. I have the whole plot sorted out. It gets better, way better. TRUST MEEE. Also I'm sorry for the chapters being so short. I'm just getting the hang of it. Be patient with me. Next few chapters will be longer I assure youu. Please reviewwww. It would mean A LOT to meeee xx
P.s the song paradise belongs to the most awesomest band alive also known as Coldplay.
Harry Potter belongs to amazingly amazing J.K Rowling, seeee? It rhymes! :D
My blackberry belongs to Me cause I'm that awesome. Lol jk
Thankyou to soapman333 for beta reading this for me. :)
Well, that went well.
As soon as she rushed out, the whole of manor seemed to turn void. All the brightness of the colors seemed to fade away to darkness. My own breaths became hitched and my heart pounded against my chest. I may lack bravery and I may not be the best of fathers, but I am no way near becoming a heartless father. It’s burning me from the inside out to see her react like this. This is not what I expected from her. This is not what I've taught her, but can I blame her? No, I cannot. Should I blame myself instead? I can relate to her more than she can relate to herself at this very moment. I know how it feels to have a set of obligations to follow, to be the subservient one. Everyday there is a new task. I've somehow managed to escape that malicious world, but will she be able to the same? I can’t change her fate. I can be lenient, but I simply can not over rule what is already written for her. I am hoping for Merlin’s sake that she doesn’t decide to become a muggle.
I have absolutely no idea where my one and only daughter is off to or how she will acquit under the given circumstances. I should not have permitted the use of muggle gadgets. Damn those sodding muggles and their innovations
I just want what's ideal for her. I should have anticipated this through. I'm bound no matter what I do or say. Who could have perceived that pure blood friendships would affect my progeny so much? Ironies of life. I chuckle at this thought and stare at the ailment in front of me. My appetite is far gone. The air inside the room is intoxicating. I require a crisp air to flow over me, to add some thoughts of tranquility. Merlin knows I need that. Scorpius is staring at me; I didn’t need to look up to apprehend that much. He doesn't say a word as he knows I won't tolerate his misconduct more than I already have. He abruptly rises from his seat and exits the hall. I feel the need to flee, as well. It is all becoming too much for me to handle.
Astoria’s pitiful green eyes are focusing on me. I am beyond bewildered at how the majority of women shed tears and get past the problem. Mikaela isn’t like her mother. She didn’t cry, she repels from the problem and seeks for revenge.
Astoria finally gathers the courage to speak, well, more like squeak. It is about time that she gets her tongue back. I roll my eyes.
Her voice is barely a whisper, "I'm scared for her." You are not the only parent to Mikaela in this room, you know, I think, but my thoughts are bitter and cold. The only sympathy I had lied with Mikaela. This is not Astoria’s fault, yet she is suffering. Being a parent is not an easy job, remember that. It’s actually rather distressing and dreadful. You have to swallow emotions you wouldn’t, normally, want to acquaint with, and yet, most of us do it and succeed, leaving with feelings of ambiguity.
My body automatically embraces my wife into a warm hug. I wanted to share her pain with my own. She should know it’s not just her, I’m as close to agony as she is. Mikaela's and Scorpius' natal day seems to be ruined. Maybe my endowments for them would make the mood better, even if that is for a few seconds, they deserve that much. It's the least I can do as their father.
I will have a detailed conversation with Samuel King today. I will make it better for her with the scarce resources that I have.
She is my daughter, my blood. Malfoy blood.
Muggle songs. Yes, that's what I want to listen to. I jerk my finger towards the player, switching it on, and turn up the volume as high as it will go.
“And dreamed of
Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise’’
I am attached to muggle music bands, especially this one, Coldplay. They're simply amazing. I can’t help but contemplate the lyrics that I am enjoying so much. Seem similar? I thought so too.
Well this "she," in the song, is in hell and can only dream of getting out of there and going to a paradise. That's just way too much to ask for, right Karma? Destiny? Fate? Screw you along with all the other pathetic nouns that refer to you!
I push on the gas pedal and listen to the engine roar. My head is aching, this is probably due to the hair tie pulling my hair back. I untied my long locks, letting them fly freely in the air. I couldn't look back right now and I won't, I will drive until I feel better. A few raindrops fall on my face, but I don't pull the roof up. I do not care about the interior of my automobile, if it gets ruined, it can be fixed. I, on the other hand, could not be so easily repaired. And if this is what makes me feel better, then, no, I don't give a Merlin's ass about my ruined interior! I’m the epitome of all selfishness. If you could reach the end of the road of “being self centered,” which you won’t but, if you could, then you would find me sitting there. You get the point? Well, you should.
I have always enjoyed using Muggle technology. Right now, driving this car soothes me. My mood is becoming more suitable for ‘today’ as I travel further and further away from the manor.
As I look around, I notice the road is quite wide and also. . .empty. I am surrounded by large pine trees, but it isn't raining anymore, merely drizzling. The sky, also, looks unhappy which means that I'm not the only one who is suffering today. Good to know.
It’s time for a pep talk: Okay, Mikaela, listen up. You're over reacting and that's completely understandable, but it needs to cease, well, at least for now. Think with a rational mind for Merlin's sake! There is a 50% chance that you might actually like Nicholas. If you do, then that's just ‘perfecto’. You haven't ever fallen in love, or felt a 'physical affection' towards another, I can’t help but roll my eyes at my own logic.
Nicholas has a pureblood background. His family stature is similar to my own. I, also, kind of know him, so he’s not exactly random. By this, I mean all those dinners and lunches my family has shared with his, when my grandmother was still alive. No wonder they stopped right after her death.
What else do I have in common with him? We both have to sacrifice our freedom for the happiness of our elders. I know for a fact that I wouldn't do what I'm going to do if my circumstances were different. I have to accept this proposition for my own survival.
From what I remember about him, he's not entirely bad looking, in fact, he's quite the catch. I know I , myself, am not bad looking. I consider myself to be average. It's actually really referred to as “being unique,” because everyone else in my family is drop dead gorgeous. Sometimes, I question how it is that I am Scorp's twin. Maybe I was abandoned, and the Malfoys took pity on me and took me in? If that's true, then I wouldn't have the “twin connection” with Scorp, but I do, proving my theory false. I am a Malfoy, through and through.
Unfortunately, I don't have blonde hair like Scorpius, the lucky brat! I inherited my hair genes from my mother, auburn brown. However, I inherited my father's prominent jaw line and eyes. My lips are big and pulpy and I have a rounded petite nose. My skin is flawless, or so I've been told, because I can easily tan despite being pale. Whenever I fake smile, a tiny dimple appears on my left cheek, creating the illusion that I actually enjoy whatever someone else has said. It’s a good trick and it works every time. I came up with this trick because I can't genuinely smile as much as I'm expected to. Big deal! It's not cheating. Its called being practical, love. Nature has a way of creating perfect human beings such as myself. I know, I know, I simply adore myself. Sue me!
Don't worry, I know that I'm not a Greek Goddess, nor do I want to be one. I just love how I roll. I admire everything about myself, except for the fact that I'm average, or that's what I tell myself, otherwise I would be high up, resting on cloud nine. I'm already too proud. By momentarily accepting that I'm average, I inflate my ego more to a manageable size. Well, down to a size that others can manage. I smirk at this thought.
Where boys and their thoughts about me are concerned, many have asked me out and have ended up hexed by one and only *drum roll*
Scorpius Malfoy, the legend himself.
These hexes are quite impressive. The credit for that goes to the large library in our manor, filled with books on dark arts and mean hexes. Don't worry it doesn't matter, because I have never really been interested in any of the males at my school. My family name means too much to me. I can't just slag around and let my family honour crumble. Basically, I don't drink, or dance, but I do attend the parties after Quidditch matches. The Malfoy name has suffered enough with grandfather Lucius and his actions, it doesn't need me to act below myself and give into the abominable behavior that happens during those parties. After the war, Father went to work, mending my grandfather's ways, and now our family name is relatively respectable, despite the haters. It has been a slow process, but people are realizing that we aren't what our ancestors were.
Interestingly, according to my best friends, I am a boring control freak. I like having control. I am proud of who I am right now, so the rest of you can suck it. Other students at Hogwarts have a diversified sets of ambitions from my own, starting with being a diva, getting famous, dating a handsome, popular bloke, and so on. I only have one ambition.
My focus in Hogwarts is winning.
What in the Merlin’s name is this annoyingly loud voice? I blink twice and look at the gauge. Sodding hell! The fuel's finished, and I'm in the middle of no-bloody-where.
This is just revolting!
At least it’s not dark yet. I won't get mugged during the daytime, or that's what I would like to assume. I am such an optimist! Yeah, that’s me, Mikaela Malfoy, the admirable optimist! I mentally slap myself for not checking the fuel gauge before now, and quickly press a few buttons to pull the roof over the car, “No way in hell am I going to freeze in cold!” I say to myself. You know, talking to your own self is fun. Try it sometime, preferably when you life is going towards shambles, like mine is currently. Just kidding, try it when you are bored.
I look around and observe my landscape. I know I’m in a hell called earth, that's quite clear, but where, exactly, am I? I check my pockets for my wand when I realize that I was so busy being furious at Mother and Father that I forgot grab it before I left. Same goes for my muggle phone! So much for liking muggle technology! I roll my eyes at my own stupidity.
I checked my pockets again, I barely have any muggle money in them. Oh wait, I always keep a few hundreds in my car for emergency muggle shopping. I open the dash board. Yes, I'm right, as per usual! I calm down and actually admire the scenery. This setting is just. . .different. I am surrounded by green nature in its all-encompassing beauty. I want to be like this nature, I want my life to be free and uncontrollable. I want to push away from the the binding promise my father made with my grandmother. Never have I imagined wanting to have freedom with such desperation.
There is a second option, I could give it all up. How bad can muggle life really be? Who am I kidding? My father would have a heart attack. Despite all that is going on around me, I can't do that to him. He has already suffered, so much, in his lifetime. Our family is the only thing keeping him going and I can't be selfish when it comes to him, not like this.
That doesn't mean I should let him off the hook. I'll be sure to exact revenge. I smirk as I think of all the Slytherin trademarks that are rubbing off on me. It’s really an honour to belong there, it develops qualities I already possess, like being cunning, resourceful, and ambitious.
Come to think of it, I should really think about what sort of advantage I have in this situation. I'm getting engaged! I try to focus on this, but my brain switches to “red alert.”
It’s screaming, “Mikaela, you're sitting in a fancy car, in some unknown area, without any sort of protection.”
Gosh brain, chill it!
I guess this whole road trip really wasn't one of my greatest ideas. I have many admirable ideas, mind you, but I could have just apparated to Dominique's place. Ah well. Too bad.
Was that a horn? I hurry to get out of my car.
I look like I was about to enter a beauty pageant, well, my attire isn't quite that amazing. Black silk PJ's with a Slytherin sweatshirt and my favorite Chanel slippers. It’s a muggle brand. These brands have gained quite the attention in the Wizarding community, well, at least for teenagers. Actually, mostly just girls with the addition of some blokes who actually have a good sense of style.
I am really hoping that the person driving that car isn't a killer, kidnapper, cannibal or a molester. I don't want to die on the same day I was born, seventeen years ago! That's just too cliché. A feeling of relief washes over me when I see a couple in the car. It's an elderly couple.
The couple look to be about in their mid sixties. I don't notice a significant amount of difference between the two. The old woman seems way too fond and sweet for my taste with her shoulder length grey hair, a few wrinkles, a round face, and a very sweet smile. I get a kind vibe from her. Merlin's knickers! I'm starting to sound like a Hufflepuff. Gag. The old man is wearing a plain T-shirt with a weird logo on it over a pair of jeans. He barely has any hair left. They both gaze at me with genuinely nice smiles. Merlin, what in the bleeding hell is wrong with the world today?
All I have seen today are pitiful eyes for my own bloody self. I sulk inwardly but put my fake smile on for show. It works like magic, like it always does.