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Oh The Pain! by Siriusly Love Sirius
Chapter 1: Oh The Pain!
“Albus are you alright?”
“Never better Rose, why do you ask?”
“You just seem a little bit… off. Like you’re not enjoying this as much as you usually do.”
“Don’t worry, I’m fine. Now where is that god damn snitch?!” At this sudden outburst Rose flew off on her broom, suddenly remembering that we were in the middle of a family Quidditch game and that we were playing on the opposite team.
As I watched her fly off I winced slightly at a pain in my stomach, the kind of pain that is sharp and sudden, but wears off after a few seconds.
OK, so I lied to Rose. I wasn’t alright. In fact I was in agony. But I was a Potter, and Potter’s don’t give up in the middle of Quidditch games!
And apparently neither do Weasley’s. The cheering coming from the opposing team broke me out of my pain-filled trance to notice that Rose had caught the snitch.
“Damn!” I whispered harshly to myself. As I flew towards the ground, Dominique flew up beside me.
“Don’t work yourself up about it Al, that snitch was hard to find! I never caught a glimpse of it at all during the match.” Dom said to me in her most supportive voice. Deciding that this was a better excuse than being in a pain-filled trance, I went along with it.
“Yeah, you’re right! That snitch was hard to find! Rose must have incredible eyesight. I bet I’ve inherited part of my dad’s bad sight you know? Because I sometimes get these weird blurry visions rather than normal –“
“Al you’re babbling. What’s wrong?” She cut me off.
I should really stop this babbling thing, people tend to realise there is something wrong with me when I do that. And Dom wasn’t fooled by it.
“Nothing! Why does everyone keep asking me what’s wrong?”
“Well because for one you were babbling, and everyone knows that when you babble on about any random thing there is something wrong. And secondly you kept scrunching up your face during the whole Quidditch game as if something had just stung you in the place where things should not be stung.”
Even though I was starting to get annoyed that everyone was asking me what was wrong (yes I know I'm hurting, but I don't need everyone knowing!) I couldn’t help but give a slight chuckle at Dominique’s words. She always had a way with words.
As I laughed though the pain came back and I couldn’t help but pull the so called ‘stung in the privates’ face, making Dominique become even wittier.
“Like that.” She pointed out.
“OK, so maybe there is something a little bit wrong with me. But I probably just ate some bad food. Probably what my Dad and Uncle Ron made earlier. Don’t go telling people though, I don’t need everyone harassing me with questions and ‘looking after me’ as if I can’t walk.” I replied.
Every time the whole family gathers for a meal at the Burrow (usually around two or three times a month) Nana Molly, Aunt Hermione and sometimes mum are always the ones who cook the food we all eat for dinner. But today my dad and uncle thought it would be fun to do some cooking themselves, so they were put in charge of cooking the steak. And of course I was the only who ate some of the steak because I was the only one who didn’t know it was cooked by them.
I’m still mentally cursing my family in my head for failing to mention that little fact to me.
It’s not that they’re bad cooks… it’s just… well actually yeah they are bad cooks. My uncle once tried to get me and Rose to eat cold, raw soup one time when we were younger because he didn’t even know that you had to heat soup up to eat it.
So about an hour after eating the steak I started getting little sharp pains in my stomach, which are still bothering me now. In fact they’re getting worse.
Great idea Nana for letting them cook! Thanks!
“You ate the steak?! I feel for you…” Dominique shouted.
“Yeah thanks for letting me know by the way.” I muttered sarcastically. “I’m going to go inside now, I need to sit down for a bit.” And with that I headed off into the living room, found a comfy spot on the sofa, and dozed off.
Half an hour later I was suddenly woken up by a vigorous shaking.
“Ah! What? What do you – ow!” Despite being horribly woken up, I felt a pain like no other. It was five times as worse than it was before I fell asleep.
“Al you’re sweating!” I heard someone shout. I opened my eyes to see that Lily and Rose were crouched down in front of me, looks of worry and concern plastered across their faces.
“I’m fi-“I was cut off by another harsh pain. Instead of finishing my sentence I just let out a pain filled scream. “Holy crap this hurts!”
“Merlin Al, you never swear unless it’s necessary! Uncle Harry! Mum! Someone come quickly!” Rose yelled as she ran out of the room to get someone.
“Al please tell me what’s wrong? I noticed you were in a bit of pain during that Quidditch game earlier but I just thought it’d go away after a while so I left it. But this is serious now Al. You need to tell us what’s wrong. You’re sweating and shaking for heaven’s sake!” Lily almost screamed at me.
Right at that moment my dad, mum, nana Molly and Rose came running into the room and gathered around me.
“Albus dear, what’s happened?” My mum asked softly, pressing a hand to my moist forehead.
“No one knows! He won’t say anything. All he does is just lie there wincing in pain and clutching his stomach!” Lily quickly replied.
“Albus” My dad began. “Can you please tell us what’s going on? We need to know, this could be very serious.”
“Pain… stomach… think its… bad food.” And with that came another wave of the all too familiar shooting pain, forcing me to grip my stomach even tighter than ever.
“Wait, who’s watching the cake in the oven?!”
Really nana, that’s you’re main concern right now? Not your grandson lying on the sofa in agony, but the cake? Gee thanks.
“Hermione is still in the kitchen mum!” My mum shouted. I swear I heard nana give a sigh of relief at this.
“Al” My dad interrupted. “We need to get you to St. Mungo’s. We’re going to have to apparate though, so just bare with it for a few seconds, then we’ll get you sorted out.” Then he stood up and began instructing everyone around us.
“Molly you go and let the others know what’s going on, Rose you apparate to St. Mungo’s and get a Healer on standby, Lily you side with Rose, and then Ginny and I will follow shortly with Albus.”
Seconds later nana Molly had rushed out to the garden, Lily and Rose had suddenly disappeared and I could feel myself being lifted up by who I could only assume were my parents.
“Hold on tight Al.” My dad warned. A second later I could feel my stomach twist and turn in ways which I didn’t think were possible at the moment, only to suddenly feel my feet planted on solid white tiles, the aftermath of the apparition leaving me feeling like my stomach was doing flips along with the pain. At this I quickly gripped my stomach, hoping that it would somehow be enough to stop me from throwing up.
Just then a Healer approached us with Rose and Lily following quickly behind.
“Hello Albus, I’m Healer Daniels. I hear there is something wrong with your stomach?” He asked politely and very calmly.
I on the other hand was far from calm, so when I shouted ‘yes’ to him, he was very slightly startled at the sudden outburst.
“Right, let’s get you to a bed. If you’d just like to lay upon the second one on the right, then I can examine you.” He gestured to the second bed on the right and led us to it.
Once I was fully rested on the bed he began examining me, or rather prodding my stomach numerous times to find out where the pain was (which only hurt more), which he confirmed was coming from my digestive system.
Such a genius, like I didn’t know that already.
“OK, you need to drink this. All of it. Then all we can do is wait.” Healer Daniels said. He then handed over a blue-purple coloured potion for me to drink.
“Wait for what exactly?” I heard my mum ask while I let out another cry of pain.
“Just wait, you’ll see. It won’t be long, don’t worry. I’ve got to run off to another patient now. Remember Albus – drink it all!” healer Daniels said before flying off down the corridor.
It’s safe to say that I’m rather worried about what this potion will do now.
The pain returned yet again, so I decided to pause the worrying and downed the whole bottle, which I discovered tasted like dragon piss as I began to cough away the taste.
Fifteen long minutes of pain and hurt passed by before I started to feel it intensify. It felt as if someone had stabbed me in the gut, healed me with stitches and then stabbed me again.
“Argh! Shit, someone stop this!” I cried out.
“He looks like he’s about to give birth.” I heard Rose say to Lily, to which she laughed at very loudly.
“Not… funny… Rose!” I said between painful breaths. This only caused them to laugh more.
Such a caring family I have.
“This must be it. This must be the potion kicking in.” I heard dad say to mum.
“OW! Bloody hell!” I screamed.
“I guess it must be but why would it hurt him even –“
Everyone completely froze. Silence filled the air as everyone registered what had just happened. My family all looked at each other, before slowly letting little chuckles escape their mouths, which eventually turned into fits of laughter from all four of them.
I just let out the loudest, biggest, longest fart this world had ever witnessed.
But on the plus side the pain had completely vanished.
“Al… you just… oh Merlin… that was –“but Lily was unable to finish her sentence due to her laughing taking over her voice.
Just as I was about to turn a nice shade of red rather similar to a tomato, they all quickly put their hands up to their noses and winced from the smell. At this I couldn’t help but laugh myself.
“Ha-ha, sorry everyone!” I apologized, still smiling to myself at the discomfort on my family’s faces.
“Merlin! I guess the potion worked then?” I heard Healer Daniels say as he neared the bed, one hand also held over his nose.
“Well I’m no longer in pain.” I replied.
“Thank goodness.” I heard mum whisper.
“Well that’s good news then!” the Healer stated. “Basically the cause of your pain was just a seriously bad case of trapped wind, which can be caused by bad food or drink. Did you eat anything earlier that could have possibly brought this on?”
All I did was glare daggers at my dad, who shied away slightly towards mum.
“The steak.” Lily and Rose stated together. “See dad, this is why you should leave the cooking to the women!” Lily continued.
“Hey, it wasn’t just me, it was your uncle as well!” he retorted back rather childishly. Good one dad, way to win an argument.
“Right, well that could very likely be the cause then. But as long as you don’t feel any more pain, you are free to go Mr Potter.” Healer Daniels said. I gave a quick nod to confirm I was no longer in pain and with that he headed back off down the corridor.
As I began sitting up to get out of the bed, I found it felt so easy and pain-free that I couldn’t help but give a small sigh. Of course my sister and cousin just laughed at this.
“Oh whatever, I’m happy now.” I answered back at them as I practically jumped out of the bed, loving the feeling of not being in agony anymore.
We walked a few feet down the corridor before we reached the entrance, and as we were all getting ready to apparate back to the Burrow, a thought just occurred to me.
“Urm, can we not tell anybody the real story of what happened? I can just picture James in my head mocking me until I go to bed!” I begged them all.
“Sure Al.” My mum replied. “We’ll just say it was a nasty stomach bug that was quickly fixed with a potion.” She then smiled sweetly at me and grabbed my arm to apparate us back.
After feeling like I was being sucked through a vortex and could feel my feet back on the ground again, all I could do was collapse on to the sofa, ready to just take a nap.
Dad and mum went into the kitchen to tell nana Molly we’re back, yet Rose and Lily stayed still on the spot, looking at each other with smiles on their faces. Their smile filled faces then turned to look at me, indicating that a plan was about to happen. And I knew just what it was.
“Guys. Don’t. You said you wouldn’t!”
“Don’t what Al?” Lily replied innocently. “If I remember correctly, neither me nor Rose said anything back at the hospital.” They abruptly began laughing. It was quite evil actually if you ask me.
“No, no please! I swear to Merlin if you tell them then-“
“James! Guess what happened to Al at the hospital!?” Rose shouted, running out to the garden with Lily to find him.
Hi! Thank you so much for reading this story! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! It was so much fun writing this one shot :D
Everything you recognise here of course belongs to the wonderful J.K.Rowling except for the plot :)