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Chapter 8: Underneath it All
"Malfoy, don't you ever get tired of being rejected by me?" I asked Malfoy during Charms.
"Not really." He answered, shrugging. "Sometimes it hurts a little, but I just convince myself that you're simply playing hard to get."
"More like impossible to get if you ask me." Zabini said grinning.
"Which is why no one asked you." Malfoy said through gritted teeth. Hermione and I giggled. Malfoy shot me a look, and I gave him my most innocent face. He smiled a little. "I just can't stay mad at you."
I smiled back a little too. Lately, I had trouble staying mad at him too. I'd never admit this to anyone, but Malfoy wasn't annoying me very much anymore, I kind of looked foward to the times where he would flirt with me and I'd shoot him down.
And I had also been finding him slightly funny and a tiny bit charming too. But again, I'd never admit it to anyone, though I think Hermione knows. We've gotten really close in the time I've been here, and I consider her my best friend. Other than Harry, of course.
Things are going really good with Harry. It's only been a month, but I like where it's going. Having a best friend and a boyfriend in one kind of reminds me of when I was with Kale, but then it's completely different from that situation.
Speaking of Kale, he's being really good about me and Harry dating, which I'm so happy about. We still write all the time, and Harry is actually okay with it.
"Do you ever get tired of rejecting me Sloane?" Malfoy asked me.
"Is that a rhetorical question?" I asked.
"No." He said seriously.
"No, I don't." I answered. "But it is rather tiring having the same conversation of why I won't go out with you."
"I completely agree. So, why don't we switch the conversation up a bit, and instead of you saying 'no' you say 'yes' when I ask you out?" Malfoy suggested.
"Umm..." I pretended to think it over. "No. Rejecting you is just too much fun."
"You're a cruel girl, Sloane Jules." He said. I shrugged. "Lucky for you I like that."
"Lucky, huh?" I asked. "We clearly have different meanings of the word."
We were silent for a few moments. "Hey,Sloane?" Malfoy asked.
"Yes?" I asked looking at him.
"Will you please go on a date with me?" He asked.
I sighed. "Malfoy, my answer hasn't changed from twenty minutes ago when you last asked me."
"Why not?" Here we were having the same conversation again. I was tired of it, so I decided to switch it up.
"Why should I go on a date with you, Malfoy?" I asked.
Malfoy seems caught off by my response since I decided to try something new. "Um, hold on, let me think of some good ones." He said.
A moment later, he was ready. "Well, I'm funny, charming, devilishly handsome, and mostly nice. I'll treat you like a lady, show you a good time, and I won't take advantage of you on the first date." He answered.
"Well, would you take advantage of me on the second date?" I asked, just to humor him.
A sly grin spread across his face. "Well, that depends on if you want me to. If you do, then I surely will."
I somehow managed to keep a smile off of my face. "All right then." I said. "But just so you know, I'm still not going on a date with you."
Malfoy groaned. "Why are you messing with my emotions?!"
"Because I'm having so much fun." I shrugged. "And what do you expect? I have a boyfriend, I'm not going to go on a date with you. Not to mention if I said 'yes' that would take the fun out of rejecting you."
"You know, Draco," Blaise started. "I think a better question is why are you letting her play with your emotions?"
"That is a rather good question." Hermione pondered.
"Because I know that underneath all the rejection, Sloane really wants me." Malfoy answered.
All of us, excluding Malfoy laughed. "Yeah, right, it's so obvious she wants you." Blaise said sarcastically.
"That's like me saying that underneath all your meaness towards me you want to be my friend." Hermione laughed at Malfoy.
"Or like saying underneath all the obnoxiousness, Pansy is a pleasant person." Blaise said.
"Or that underneath all your flirting you really hate me." I added in.
"Oh, haha." Malfoy said sarcastically. "You're all so damn hilarious."
"Aww, I think we upset him." Hermione said.
"Come on, mate, we were just having a laugh." Blaise said.
"Yeah, we're really sorry." I said.
"Whatever, it's no big deal." He said.
Before I can respond, Harry is infront of me, leaning down to kiss me. I smile, meeting him halfway. As usual, he tastes of delicious strawberries, which I never understand, but at the same time I love.
"Hey." I said.
"Hey." He responded. "Just came over here to see how it's going." He glanced at Malfoy.
"It's fine." I assured him.
"You sure?" He asked quietly.
"Positive, babe." I said.
"Fine." Harry said. "I'll let you get back to work. By the way, you're even sexier when you're working, have I ever told you that?"
I giggled. "No."
"Well, I should have."
We kissed again, before he walked away. I looked at Malfoy who was trying to make himself seem busy, but I knew better. Underneath all that jealousy was a hell of a lot more jealousy.
"Why the hell are you acting like this, Sloane?!" He growled angrily.
"Because you're a liar!" I screamed just as angrily, walking away from him.
He grabbed my arm roughly. "Don't you walk away from me!" He said.
"Or what?!" I asked. "You'll hit me again and then promise it will never happen again?!"
"It won't happen again. This time I mean it."
"No you don't!" I cried. "You keep lying. Promising me it won't happen again, and then five minutes later, you turn around and do it again."
"It's not my fault, Sloane. I don't mean it. It's just you do something I don't like and I snap." He tried to explain.
I shook my head. "You don't do this when you're sober." He sighed. "You are a totally different person when you're sober. I love you when you're sober."
"Are you saying you don't love me right now?" He asked.
I couldn't answer. The tears just rolled down my face. That was enough of an answer. Anger flashed across his face. "You do love me." he said. "You have to."
I shook my head again, and tried to walk away, but he spun me around quickly and pressed his lips against mine. I pushed him away hard. He tried to come back, so I slapped him across the face. I hadn't meant to, but I was so scared and I panicked.
He quickly retaliated by slapping me back. I held my face and cried. Not even from the pain of the slap, but the pain of knowing what I had to do.
"No." I cut him off. "I'm done. I can't do this anymore."
"What are you trying to say?" He asked.
"I'm leaving you." I whispered.
"No, you're not." He said. He wasn't angry. He didn't demand I wasn't. He sounded desperate. "You can't. I love you."
"I love you too, but I can't do this. I can't let you keep hurting me like this."
"I will never hurt you again, I swear. I'll get help, whatever I have to do to keep you I'll do it." His eyes were so pleading.
"I don't know of I can believe you." I said.
"You can." He insisted. "Just, please. I can't live without you, Sloane. I need you."
I sighed. He was pulling me right back in. I gave him a small smile. He knew he hadn't lost me. He kissed me and I kissed him back. If I didn't love him so much, I would have left. I should have left, it would have saved me a lot of pain.
"Sloane, did you hear me?"
"Huh?" I must have spaced out again. I looked to see both Harry and Luna staring at me quizzically.
"I asked you if you finished Flitwick's essay." Harry said.
"Um no." I answered. "I have to talk to Malfoy about something on it."
"Oh." He said.
"Sloane, are you okay?" Luna asked.
"I'm fine, sorry, just really out of it today." I said.
"It's quite all right, I can see the Wrakspurts just flying around your head making your brain go fuzzy." She answered.
"Damn Wrakspurts." I muttered shaking my head, knowing Wrakspurts had nothing to do with me being out of it.
"Maybe you should just go lie down." Harry said sounding concerned.
"No, it's fine." I insisted. "I'm going to go find Malfoy, so I can finish my Charms essay." I said getting up.
"Do you want me to come with you?" Harry asked.
"Nah, it's okay, I'll be fine." I said.
"Okay, see you later." He said reaching up and giving me a quick kiss.
"Bye, Luna." I said hugging her.
"Bye." She said. "I hope you feel better."
"Thanks." I walked off.
Before exiting the library, I turned back around and saw Harry and Luna in deep conversation. I was happy with how quickly they had become friends.
I easily found Malfoy, walking the halls like he owned the damn place.
"Hey, Malfoy, I've been looking for you." I said.
"Sloane, I've been waiting to hear you say that from the moment I laid eyes on you." He said.
I rolled my eyes. "I need your notes for Charms, I'm not professing my undying love for you."
"So, you admit you have am undying love for me?" He asked.
"No." I said. "Now give me the notes." He raised his eyebrows at me. "Please." I grumbled.
"Was that so hard?" Malfoy asked pulling out the notes.
I grabbed the notes, but he didn't let go. He took a step closer. "How long are we going to keep playing this game, Sloane?" He asked.
"What game?" I asked.
"This little cat and mouse game. I know underneath it all, you want me. You may not have before, but you definitely do now."
"I do not." I said.
"Really?" He asked quickly leaning foward quickly to kiss me. But he stopped about a centimeter away.
His grey eyes met my light brown ones. I could barely even breath, and I didn't know why.
"I would kiss you, but I don't want you going back to Potter. But when I do kiss you, which will be very soon, you will be all mine." Malfoy said softly as he tucked a piece of red hair behind my ear.
I closed my eyes at his touch. When I opened them, he was backing away from me, a smirk on his face.
Is it crazy that I kind of wished he kissed me?