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And Mayhem Ensues by starryskies55
Chapter 4: The Marauders Plan Mischief
After lunch, Lily and Remus led the way to the library, and James followed Lily, so Sirius and I followed him. Peter was still eating. The library was a huge old place, and felt like a tribute to some half-forgotten literature deity. The church-like silence which prevailed was heavy, and I found myself tiptoeing past the shelves until James and Sirius loudly turfed some first-years off a table.
Lily scowled at James but sat down anyway, grateful to have a table in the coolness of the library. We all sat near her. I was opposite James, and he began to pull stupid, immature and highly funny faces. I nearly choked from holding in my laughter. You can’t laugh in a church/library/thing- but everything always seems funnier when you have to be serious. That set me off again. I can’t be serious, because Sirius was... I was a comedic genius.
Sirius actually had a fairly straight face, and then I realised he was half-way down the bench. He’d been sliding down while we weren’t looking! James looked down and I slid a couple of inches towards Sirius.
Soon we were all right at the other end of the table- leaving Lily in peace. Even Remus had been sliding, pulling his books and quills subtly along with him. We all looked up at the same time and caught everyone else looking, and we buried our heads in our arms to stifle our laughter. I heard Lily quietly tutting.
“Why haven’t you come to Hogwarts before?” Remus asked under his breath after we’d earned a glare from a steely librarian.
“I did- I was here for a few months of first year,” I answered.
“That’s not what Remus meant,” said Sirius. I’d slid so close to him I could feel his breath on my hair. I shuffled away slightly.
“I was home-schooled,” I said. A satisfyingly normal and mostly true statement.
James frowned. “Does that mean you’re thick?” he asked.
What sort of a question was that?
Remus hit him over the head with a book. “You’re a prat,” he told James.
“Okay, why were you home-schooled?” James asked, rubbing the back of his head.
“My mum didn’t want me to come.”
“So why are you here now?” James said.
“My stepdad said I should come.”
I noticed that while Remus was listening- interested but tactful, Sirius looked satisfied with my vague answers. I clenched my hands under the table. They were starting to shake again.
“So you’re Sirius Black?” I asked him.
“Yeah,” he said, stretching his legs under the table and kicking James. “The Third.”
He looked so arrogant, so I decided to take him down a peg. “Shouldn’t all the members of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black be in Slytherin?” I raised my eyebrows at him, and he scowled at me, but apparently unperturbed by my knowledge of wizarding genealogy.
Know thine enemy, and all that jazz.
“I could say the same for you,” he drawled.
He freaking knew.
HE KNEW. Hang on. I knew he must have known- hell, he was a pure-blood, he was a Black, of course he’d know me- and he gave me that funny look in Dumbledore’s office!
I knew he might have known, and I still went and said that stupid thing?
He knew me.
What if he told?
That sounded so infantile. But still. What if he did?
He grinned at my shocked face, and said “Anyway. Infamous family members notwithstanding-”
I swallowed and he winked at me. But James was hardly listening, and Remus was gazing at his quill, his expression vacant.
“What are we going to do?”
Remus abandoned all pretence of work, and James leant forwards. “Excellent,” he said. “Plan 6. 2.”
“Plan six point two?” I asked. This wasn’t about me.
“Yes,” said Remus. “Sixth year, plan number two.”
“What was your first?” I hardly dared to ask.
“One of our best yet.”
“It was,” said Remus, “the most elaborate plan we’ve ever done. The last day before the summer, we sneaked into Dumbledore’s office, and bewitched the Sorting Hat.”
“It was a moment of pure genius,” slipped in James. “So when all the titchy first-years got all lined up to get Sorted, they put on the Hat and-”
“And then their hair started to change colour,” said Sirius. “And then Dumbledore took that spell off the Hat, and the next group started to age really quickly-”
“All these tiny kids going through puberty in about five minutes,” James said. “It was amazing.”
“And then Dumbledore took that spell off the Hat, and the last lot of first years got transfigured into animals,” Remus said, looking at me for approval.
I burst out laughing. “You’re kidding.”
“We are not!” said James, while shushing me. “There was one ginger kid who turned into a full grown lion! A Gryffindor of course.”
It sounded brilliant. Not to mention that was some pretty complicated magic.
“But now we’re afraid we’ve used up all of our creativity. It’s a week in, and we haven’t thought of Plan 6. 2.” Remus sighed.
“Any ideas, Llewellyn?” Sirius asked.
I ignored his use of my surname. “I’ve always wondered what the other House common rooms are like...”
There was silence for a moment as they considered it.
“That’ll be quite hard,” mused Remus. “We’d need passwords and disguises.”
“My stepfather was in Ravenclaw, and he said their password was just a question you needed to answer,” I volunteered.
“Okay, so that’s one down. Hufflepuff’ll be something easy,” James said dismissively. “It’s Slytherin we’ll have to worry about.”
“Polyjuice Potion?” Remus suggested. “But once we get in we’ll have to trash it.”
“Nah,” said James. “Polyjuice Potion is old news, and it’ll be way better if we can waltz into all of them as ourselves.”
I couldn’t believe they were actually going to do it. My idea had not been serious.
“If we trashed the Slytherin’s, we’d have to trash all the common rooms, including ours,” Sirius said. “What if we changed all the colours around? Ours is red and gold, surely the other common rooms would be the same?”
“Definitely. And we’ll have to change ours too,” said James.
Lily coughed at the other end of the table, and we looked up to see a teacher standing over us, smiling.
“Professor Sharpe!” Remus said.
He grinned widely. “I didn’t hear any of that,” he whispered. “But if you are planning anything unusual, I’d advise you do it somewhere you can’t be heard.”
James and Sirius grinned. “Thanks sir!”
He nodded. “And good to see you here, Miss Llewellyn.”
James rolled his eyes at me as the teacher walked away. “Does everyone know who you are?”
A/N: So? Whaddya think? Review please! And if anyone knows who 'Professor Sharpe' is based on, (they've got the same name, and as my Sharpe teaches Defence Against the Dark Arts, it shouldn't be that hard- if you're familiar with the stories) leave me a note in a review! THANKYOUU! xx