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Chapter 19: Chaper Nineteen - Outbursts
A/N: Again, long wait, I know. And I do apologize. Been really busy. I hope though that you all got to read the one shot and it tied you over just a bit.
So here's the next one. Please keep in mind that currently Ginny is feeling very insecure and overwhelmed with everything and that Harry is fed up with the ones who are making Ginny insecure and just wants them to be happy and wants to fix things. Things are NOT fixed between them yet despite how they end up in this chapter. They are on the right track but it's not all peaches and cream with them. They still need to talk and that won't be happening until the next chapter.
And many thanks to Lynne......I bet she has too! And Geography lessons are awesome.
DISCLAIMER: not mine.
Chapter Nineteen – Outbursts
Nearly an hour later, the entire family was sitting around the table and enjoying the meal everyone had helped to make. Barely twenty minutes into dinner, there was a quiet knock on the back door. Molly jumped to her feet and hurried to answer it.
“Harry!” she cried and ushered him inside. “Good heavens, why in Merlin’s name are you knocking? You know you can just walk right in, dear.”
Without letting Harry reply, Molly engulfed him in bone-crushing hug. Once she let go, Harry was finally allowed to enter the kitchen. He wore a wide smile on his face as the family began to crowd around him, shouting out words of congratulations for playing in the match. Ginny hung back in her seat and watched as her husband was welcomed with open arms. For a moment he looked like the small little twelve year old boy he once was and being accepted into her family with no questions asked. His smile radiated his joy of being accepted, of being a part of a family and she was grateful that he was able to be that happy.
And if it were even possible, his look of joy intensified when his eyes landed on her. Ginny was momentarily shocked after everything that had happened between the two of them. Wasn’t he still upset with her? Hadn’t he been thinking over everything like she had? If anything, he should be sending murderous glares in her direction, but he wasn’t. He was looking at her as if she were the most precious thing in the world to him (which deep down, she knew she was just that to him). Neither his eyes nor his face showed any hint of anger with her, only love. So despite Ginny’s own mind was screaming out to her that she shouldn’t allow him to look at her like he was, she wasn’t going to let it come between them at this moment in time. Instead, she returned his smile.
Slowly the family went back to their seats and left Harry with Molly fussing over him.
“Mum, we’ve got a really good Healer for our team. He’s already taken care of me. I’ll be fine,” Harry said as Molly flexed and extended his arm from his elbow back and forth.
“That’s wonderful dear, but let me look you over. I don’t trust a Healer who has twelve other people to look over,” Molly insisted. She yanked the sleeve of his shirt up and eyed his elbow critically. “We were all so worried when you crashed. I want to make sure you’re okay.”
Harry gave in and let his mother-in-law do her own evaluation of him.
“Walk,” Molly ordered once she completed her examination of his arm. Harry gave her a strange look.
“Err, what?” He glanced at Ginny with a pleading look on his face. She merely shrugged in response. She knew her mother wouldn’t be satisfied until she was convinced he truly was fine and nothing she could do could stop her.
“Walk. Walk across the kitchen,” Molly repeated and motioned for him to move.
Harry sighed and did as told. He grimaced slightly as he put his weight on his right leg.
“You’re limping!” Ginny cried and leapt out of her seat. Her chair fell over in her haste to get to him.
“I’m fine,” he insisted. He tried to wave her off but Ginny was having none of it. Her protectiveness over him had kicked in at the sight of him limping.
“You bloody well aren’t fine,” Ginny argued as she knelt on the ground and took his knee gently in her hands. He hissed in pain. She glared up at him. “See!”
“I said I was fine, Ginny,” Harry growled.
“Why are you limping then?” she stood up.
“I’m not,” he insisted.
“You’re a terrible liar.”
“I said I was fine!”
“I’ve never believed that in the past, why should I believe it now?”
“Because it’s the truth!”
“Harry James Potter, why can’t you admit that you’re hurt?”
“I’m not hurt!”
“Then why in Merlin’s name are you limping!”
“Why do you care?”
“Because I’m your wife and I care about you!”
“Didn’t seem that way yesterday! Not after the things you said to me!”
A rare moment of complete silence washed over the kitchen of the Burrow. Everyone was staring at the feuding couple wearing various expressions of shock and surprise. Ginny couldn’t blame them for looking like that. No one knew the problems they were having aside from Molly. She was sure everyone else firmly believed they were the perfect happy couple.
All of Ginny’s insecurities flooded her at once while her shocked family looked on. Not just the rows she and Harry had been having, but the feelings of not being a good enough wife for him came back. If only she were a better wife, none of this would have happened. If she were a better wife, they’d be perfectly happy right now. Those reporters were all right; she could never be good enough for him.
Ginny closed her eyes and took a deep breath to keep herself from losing it. She couldn’t take the staring and silence. She had to leave. She took off through the door that led to the back garden.
She heard Harry swear loudly before the door closed behind her. Soon she heard it opening and she knew Harry was following her. She kept going, picking up her pace and not entirely sure she where she was heading only knowing she needed to get away.
It was much colder out now, an unusually cold evening for this time of the year. Ginny ignored the cold. She dimly noted that the sun was just now setting over the horizon. It gave her enough light to see where she was going.
“Ginny!” Harry called after her. “Ginny, wait!”
She stopped at the fence and found herself clutching it tightly in her hands.
“What?” she snapped. She spun suddenly and faced Harry. “What else do you want to say to me? That I’m awful and terrible and I don’t deserve you. I already know that! I already know I’m an unfit wife for you! All those reporters are getting it right! You deserve so much better than me! I can’t care for you like I should. All I do is argue with you and say horrible things to you! I know that I’m ruining our marriage!”
Harry froze in shock. Obviously he wasn’t expecting her to blow up like that, and if she were honest with herself, neither was she. She hadn’t meant to say any of that, but once it was out she kept going and she couldn’t stop. Harry’s surprise was short-lived. A look of intense anger sat on his face. Ginny cringed. This wouldn’t be good.
“Don’t you ever say that again,” he nearly snarled. He gripped her arms tightly and pulled her to him. She winced slightly at his grip. “We’ve already discussed this, Ginny, and I will not have you think that about yourself any longer. I hate what that hag Nosebury has done to you. She’s got you believing the lies! Stop believing them! Stop thinking those vile things about yourself because they aren’t true! They aren’t!”
“Harry,” she whimpered. “You’re holding my arms too tight.”
He immediately released her, looking apologetic. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, love. It just makes me so mad that she’s got you believing these stupid things still.”
Ginny rubbed her arms where he had held her, but Harry quickly batted her hands away and did it for her.
“Kind of difficult when you got them being shoved in your face all the time,” Ginny replied and looked down at the ground feeling ashamed of herself. She was trying so hard not to let the lies invade her thoughts, but it was hard. All those reports and articles and the looks she got from complete strangers. She was strong, but sometimes even the strong start to break.
“I wish you’d stop thinking I don’t deserve you,” he said quietly. He let go of her right arm and used his free hand to lift her chin up. “It’s utterly absurd that you’re still thinking this way. Even if that were true, which you know isn’t, that’s not the cause of our problems. It’s both of us . . . I love you so much, Ginny. If it weren’t for you, I’d probably still be moping about and feeling guilty for everything that happened in the War. It’s because of you I’ve been able to move past things and deal with what I went through. You are such an amazing person, Ginny, and absolutely perfect for me.”
She knew what he was saying was true. She hated feeling so insecure. It had to stop, these feelings of being unworthy. Still, it didn’t change the fact that they were still having problems and that needed to be fixed.
“I’m so sorry for everything I said,” Ginny quickly apologized. “I was so stupid to let my temper get the best of me. I didn’t mean a thing I said, Harry. I know you have talent – I’ve played with you, I know how good you are and –”
Harry cut her tirade off with a kiss. Momentarily shocked, Ginny wasn’t sure what had happened until she realized his lips were pressed against hers. When she came to her senses, she began kissing him back, letting her apologies flow to him in the form of her lips.
When they pulled apart, their foreheads were pressed against each other and Harry was still rubbing her arms.
“I know you didn’t mean to say those things,” he murmured to her. “I know you would never say those things to me if you weren’t so angry with me. That’s what happens when you argue. You say things you don’t mean.”
“I’m still sorry,” Ginny sighed and wrapped her arms around his neck. She felt him nod against her as his hands came down to rest on her waist. “Harry, we need to talk about what’s going on between us. If we keep this up we’re going to end up unhappy and hating each other.”
He pulled away a bit from her and nodded. “I know. Merlin, I know. I’ve been thinking about this all weekend – probably been making your necklace go crazy. I’ve been stupid with the way I’ve been acting. I don’t know what to do with you around all the time. You drive me absolutely mental.”
Ginny frowned. “I’m not sure if I should take that to mean a good thing or not.”
Harry chucked and quickly kissed her. “It’s a good thing. I feel so lucky to have you around me all the time. I don’t feel like I deserve you half the time. Some mornings I’m taken by surprise to see you next to me. Whatever did you want with someone broken like me?”
“Harry, I love you,” Ginny interrupted. “We’ve had this conversation before. Nothing about you can change how I feel about you. We belong together.”
“So why are you still sprouting this rubbish about you not deserving me?” he questioned and smirked at her. “You should start listening to the things you tell me, love. Maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess like we are now.”
Ginny sighed. She knew he was right. She wasn’t listening to herself. They did belong together, they did deserve each other. It wasn’t so easy to remember that when the press was printing stories left and right about her and when she allowed everything to build up like she had.
“Did you want to talk now?” he asked after they were silent for a few moments.
Ginny shook her head. She placed her hands on his chest and looked up at him. “I’d rather wait until we get back to your flat. We won’t be interrupted then.”
Harry nodded in agreement. “Probably best for that discussion.”
Ginny sighed and looked up at Harry. She slid her hands onto his shoulders, momentarily enjoying the feel of his muscles hidden beneath his shirt.
“We should head back inside before they send a search party for us,” Ginny suggested.
Harry nodded. But when Ginny tried to step back, Harry wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close.
“Harry?” she questioned and looked up at him puzzled.
He was gazing down at her, a soft smile on his face. “I haven’t properly greeted you yet.”
Ginny grinned. “No, I don’t believe you have. We were both a little busy trying to outshout each other.”
Harry chuckled lightly. He squeezed her slightly and sighed with content.
“Hi,” he breathed his soft smile turning into a full out ear to ear grin.
“Hi,” she replied and matched his grin.
Harry leaned down, his eyes fixed on her lips. A flash of pink appeared between his lips as his tongue licked along them. Ginny felt her heart beating faster, knowing that he was about to kiss her. Despite the fact that they had shared thousands, maybe even millions of kisses, this felt like it was the first time all over again.
His lips made contact with hers. It was tender and sweet. It almost felt as if this kiss was the beginning of something new between them and maybe it was. Maybe after this they’d be able to get past this bump in their relationship.
After several moments (and after things heated up between them), neither one of them seemed like they wanted to stop. At least Ginny was sure she didn’t want to. She could happily skip dinner and go back to the flat with Harry right at that moment.
“Mmm,” Harry hummed against her lips. His hands had explored lower and he pulled one of her legs up to wrap around his hip. “Suddenly, I’m not so hungry for dinner. What do you say to skipping and going home?”
Ginny giggled and kissed him again. “My thoughts exactly.”
Harry growled low in his throat, surprising Ginny yet sending a shiver of pleasure down her spine. She gripped the front of his shirt tightly in her hands as she continued to take part in their impromptu snogging session in the back garden of her parents’ house.
“One minute they’re shouting at each other, the next they’re all over each other! OI!”
Harry pulled back slightly but didn’t let go of Ginny. He burrowed her face into the crook of her neck. “I hate your brothers.”
“I do too,” Ginny agreed and glanced in the direction of the Burrow. Two figures, one in the shape of Ron and the other in the shape of Hermione, were walking quickly towards them.
“Potter,” Ron snapped unexpectedly once he reached them.
“Yes?” both Harry and Ginny answered. Harry smirked at her, a look of extreme pleasure floated over his features at her response. Ginny merely shrugged her shoulders.
Ron glared at each of them. He settled his look on Ginny.
“What was that all about back there?” he demanded. He continued to glare at her. “Are you two rowing?”
Ginny raised her eyebrows at her brother, baffled by why he would be angry over this. It wasn’t any of his concern if she and Harry were going through a bit of a rough time.
“We were,” Harry answered slowly. Ginny glanced at him and saw he wore the same confused look she did.
“Why?” Ron demanded again.
“Ron,” Hermione hissed. “Leave them alone.”
“No, Hermione,” Ron refused and turned on her. His glare intensified. “They aren’t supposed to row and end up like that!”
“Everyone rows, Ron,” Hermione replied with annoyed patience. “We row.”
“We aren’t them. They’re not supposed to do it,” Ron argued.
“For Merlin’s sake, Ron, they’re human! They’re bound to have an argument or two!”
“It is not!”
“It is too! You’re being unreasonable!”
“I am not being unreasonable! Harry and Ginny aren’t supposed to be yelling at each other like that!”
“They aren’t like us! They don’t argue!”
“It’s going to happen!”
“Because they’re supposed to be happy! They can’t be happy if they row!”
Hermione stared at him for a moment, a look of intense anger and a hint of understand on her face. She clearly wasn’t done with this discussion with him.
“So according to your logic, since you and I row, we aren’t happy? Is that what you’re saying, Ron?” she snapped.
“No, we’re perfectly happy. We row and we’re happy about it, because that’s just who we are. We don’t mean anything by it. Everyone expects us to row and we’re perfectly fine in our relationship. But they aren’t us. If they row then it’s . . . it’s not . . . right,” Ron argued, finally losing steam towards the end of his statement.
Harry and Ginny stared, stunned by what was happening before them. Hermione on the other hand looked as if she completely understood what was going on in Ron’s mind, and well she was probably the one who actually did understand where he was going with his tirade.
“Ron?” Ginny called quietly after a few moments of silence.
He looked at her, a pained expression on his face. “What was that back in the kitchen?” he asked again.
“We’ve sort of been rowing the past few days,” Ginny explained.
“Why?” Ron demanded. “Aren’t you two happy with each other?”
“Of course we are, mate. We’ve just been having a few problems,” Harry answered and stepped toward Ron. Ginny couldn’t help but notice he was putting himself between her and Ron. She caught his hand twitch towards where he usually kept his wand.
Ron stared at Harry, a hard expression on his face. “Why?”
Harry sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Look, it’s hard to explain. But we’re working it out.”
Ron appeared to be thinking Harry’s words over. He frowned and glanced at Ginny before looking back at Harry. “Well, finish sorting it out then. The War’s over. You’re supposed to be happy. You deserve to be happy and I don’t want to see the two of you rowing like that. Ever.”
Harry nodded solemnly in reply. Then, in complete surprise, Ron engulfed Harry in a brotherly hug. It took Harry a moment to recover, but he responded in kind and the two of them shared a few quiet words with each other.
Hermione had joined Ginny by her side and was staring at the pair of men in front of her. She looked utterly bewildered by the exchange between her boyfriend and best friend.
“I have no idea what’s gotten into him,” Hermione whispered. “He just all of the sudden shouted ‘This isn’t right’ and took off. I thought he was going to run after Harry and hex him. I understand where’s he’s coming from, but I haven’t the slightest idea why he suddenly shot off like that.”
Ginny thought over the events of the last few moments as she watched her husband and brother let go of each other. They slipped back into their easy friendship as Ron pelted Harry with questions about his match. As she watched her brother and husband talked enthusiastically with each other, a conversation she had with Ron over two months ago floated to her head.
“I think I understand where he’s coming from,” Ginny said quietly and turned to face Hermione. Once Hermione focused her attention on her, Ginny explained. “Before we got married, Ron and I were dancing in my room and talking. He told me to make sure I kept Harry happy, that he deserved to be happy after all he’s been through. I think seeing us argue like that hit something with him. We never row like that, so it made him think neither one of us were happy anymore.”
“That makes sense now that I know where it’s coming from. I know he wants you two to be happy, but he’s never reacted like this before. Clearly the two of you being happy means much more to him than he lets on,” Hermione replied. She smiled softly. “His emotional range has definitely grown since school.”
Ginny matched her smile. “It has. All thanks to you. He’s become much more perceptive I think.”
Hermione’s cheeks flushed a faint pink in the waning light. She shrugged her shoulders and nodded towards her two best friends. “Should we get them back in the house? I’m sure your entire family thinks there’s a massive dueling session going on out here and are just waiting until they think it’s safe to come out here.”
Ginny laughed and together they grabbed their respective men and began pulling them toward the house.
“Ron’s gone around the bend, don’t you think?” Harry asked once he and Ginny were walking back to the house, swinging their clasped hands between them. Ron and Hermione were several paces ahead of them and seemed absorbed in their own conversation.
“No,” Ginny replied with a shake of her head. “He just wants us to be happy. That’s all.”
“We are,” Harry said and looked at her. “Even though we’ve been rowing like crazy lately, I’d give anything to be with you.”
Ginny smiled and stopped them to give Harry a kiss. After a moment, they continued on their way. It was then that Ginny remembered Harry’s limping.
“Are you going to tell me what happened to your knee or do I need to drag it out of you again?”
Harry sighed. “When I fell I hit the knee I injured in the War. I’m fine – don’t start with me – I am. I just need to take it easy, that’s all.”
He stopped them not too far from the back door leading to the kitchen. He turned to face her and tugged on her hand to pull her closer.
“Though, you know, I may need some special attention,” Harry suggested. He waggled his eyebrows suggestively at her.
Ginny smirked and shook the hair that was falling into her eyes out of the way. “Really? What sort of special attention?”
“Oh I think you can come up with something special enough,” Harry drawled. He grinned wickedly at her. “You are rather good at coming up with ideas on ways to heal me. I seem to recall you were very talented in my recovery of that nasty sunburn in Hawaii.”
Ginny raised her eyebrows at him. She remembered that day quiet well. “Oh? I remember someone being very childish that day. I’m not sure if I want a repeat of that.”
“I promise that this time I will behave as the grown adult that I am,” he replied in a formal tone.
Ginny grinned. “Oh? And how exactly does one behave as a grown adult?”
Harry leaned in close and began kissing a path from just beneath her ear to base of her throat. “It’s much easier to show it than to explain it.”
“Mmm,” she sighed, trying to focus on the conversation. “Well in that case I may be able to think of something to help ease your pain.”
Smiling innocently, Ginny leaned up and whispered a few suggestions in his ear.
Harry let out a low growl and grabbed her around the waist. “Merlin, I missed hearing you talk to me like that.”
Ginny laughed. She was quickly silenced by Harry who had pressed his lips against hers again.
It started out as a heated kiss but quickly cooled and turned into a sweet, loving one. Slowly, Harry pulled away and looked down at her.
“I really did miss you,” Harry muttered. “And I hated leaving the way I did. We should have talked.”
Ginny sighed and buried her face against his chest. “I did too. It was terrible.” She pulled away and looked up at him. “Promise me we’ll never do that again. Promise me that we’ll talk instead of letting things get like this.”
Harry nodded. “I promise. We have plenty of time to talk about all this after dinner, but I promise.”
He kissed her again. This time it was tender and he poured his promise into it.
“Oi, newlyweds, quit with the prelude to shagging there!” Ron’s voice broke their kiss.
Ginny pulled away and rolled her eyes. She really did hate her brothers.
“And there’s the Ron we all know and love,” Harry muttered murderously under his breath. “If he wants us to be happy, he shouldn’t interrupt our happy time like that.”
Ginny snorted at his use of “happy time”. She snuck in one last kiss and faced the open door.
“Ron!” Ginny shouted and marched into the kitchen. She noticed her family looking warily between her and Harry who had followed her inside. “Must you insist on interrupting us like that?”
“Yes,” Ron said smugly from his chair. He had jumped right back into his dinner as if the last fifteen minutes had never happened. Ginny shot Ron a very nasty glare.
“If you don’t want to see it, then don’t watch,” Ginny replied primly and marched to her previously occupied seat. Harry limped after her and took the empty seat next to hers.
“I can’t help it when you’re doing it in plain view!” Ron cried. “Don’t you two believe in any sort of privacy?”
“A bit difficult to come by that when you’re always around and snapping at us! We don’t need a chaperone!” Ginny argued.
“I never said I wanted to chaperone you!” Ron retorted.
“Then drop the big brother act,” Ginny hissed.
“Then don’t snog like that in front of everyone!”
“Ron!” Hermione hissed, interrupting the sibling argument and smacked him on the shoulder. “Leave them alone.”
“Pardon me for not wanting to see my best mate and my little sister going at it while I’m eating,” Ron argued.
“They aren’t going at it,” Hermione shot back. “They missed each other.”
“It’s not like they were separated for years or anything,” Ron replied hotly. “It was just a few days, actually barely over a day!”
“Well to them it could have felt like a few years.”
“Rubbish. There’s no need for them to be like that in front of everyone.”
“Just because you can’t display any affection whatsoever doesn’t mean you have to ruin it for everyone!”
“Don’t bring us into this, Hermione!”
“I can do whatever I please, Ronald Weasley!”
“Harry!” Arthur suddenly shouted, effectively ending the feud between the couple. Harry, taken by surprise, jumped in his seat and banged his knee under the table. Judging by the barely contained swearing he released Ginny knew it was his injured knee.
“Yes?” Harry hissed painfully through his gritted teeth. Ginny slipped her hand underneath the table and gently rubbed his knee.
“Sorry, son,” Arthur apologized. He smiled before continuing on. “Why don’t you tell us how you ended up playing in the match today?”
After Harry took a few moments to recover from his pain he launched into the story. It had the desired effect Arthur intended; Ron and Hermione had stopped arguing, but still wore furious expressions, and no one bothered Harry and Ginny about what had happened when Harry had arrived.
Ginny was grateful to her father. He didn’t know what was going on between her and Harry, and Ginny was sure her mother hadn’t said a word to him about anything they had talked about earlier in the evening. Yet he seemed to have sensed something was wrong and steered the family away from questioning the couple. She’d make sure she’d thank him before they left.
As Harry finished his story and the family enjoyed their dinner, Ginny felt a little hope rise within her. Things were not fixed between herself and Harry. She couldn’t expect their conversation in the back garden to reverse the damage they had done. No, she would have to make sure once they got back to Harry’s flat that they would talk to each other, really talk to each other like her mother had said. She knew once they did things would be better, not perfect, but they would be on their way back to being the happily married couple she knew they could be.
A/N 2: Again, things are not fixed between them. Jut a bit better. And I hope you all understood where they are coming from with their outbursts and reactions. When so much is being kept inside with no outlet things are bound to break loose.