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Shakespeare, Magic, and Me by heyITSme

Format: Short story
Chapters: 8
Word Count: 10,204
Status: WIP

Rating: Mature
Warnings: Strong Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Sexual Nature, Substance Use or Abuse

Genres: Drama, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, A. Longbottom, F. Longbottom, Lily, James, Pettigrew, OtherCanon
Pairings: James/Lily

First Published: 05/30/2009
Last Chapter: 02/19/2010
Last Updated: 02/19/2010


banner by Ronsgirl29 =]

If I had a diary, I think I would write lists. Lots and lots of lists. I like lists. My first list would go as follows:
1. Get revenge against Missy Monroe for forcing us all to act out "Romeo and Juliet".
2. Ignore James Potter's tendencies to do annoyingly cute things.
3. Ignore Sirius Black's really bad advice.
4. Snog my beautiful boyfriend senseless.
5. Finish that stupid Charms essay.

Chapter 7: "Find thou the means, and I'll find such a man." Lady Capulet(3.5.108)

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing


C H A P T E R S E V E N : "Find thou the means, and I'll find such a man." Lady Capulet(3.5.108)


Previously: I closed my eyes for a moment, thinking back to how Marlene would always have a small smile on her face when she and Sirius bickered, or how she claimed she hated him when she so doesn't, or how she always gets really passionate when talking about him.

Yes, I wrote, Meet me after class. This is a problem.

I just realized that my best friend could possibly have a crush on a guy who's only enjoyment in life is teasing her. Oh yes, this week will be just grand. ]


You know how when your anxious for something to happen, it takes forever to happen? Yeah, that just about defines this stupid Transfiguration class right now.

And how, you may ask, did I waste the time away?

Freaking out about Marlene, of course! And…you know…definitely not passing notes with Potter...


Another bunched up wad of paper smacked me in the head.

You should stop starring at them. You’re going to burn a hole through McKinnon’s head. Less dramatically speaking, I think people will notice that you’re glaring daggers at my boy.

I narrowed my eyes at the note I read under my desk.

Oh? I wrote back quickly, well I’m sorry. I’m just FREAKING OUT OVER HERE. Sorry that ‘your boy’ is generally an ass to my friend and therefore gives me reason to kerk out! And really, Potter? ‘Your boy’? I smell a bromance in the air.
(JP…how…happy of you, Potter.) 

Not thirty seconds later, another note fell onto my desk,

Are you insinuating that I’m gay, Evans? Because I’m not. 
Wow. Thanks for the head up, bud. Defensive, much?

I define masculinity.

Sure, Potter.

And Sirius isn’t…that bad to Marlene! Stop kerkin’ out.
-James Potter (since JP is apparently ‘happy’..) 

I glanced around quickly; making sure no one was watching our silent conversation.

Potter, how can you not see that you and Sirius have a bromance going on?! You two are freakishly coordinated and synchronized in everything you do and you two are just…so…close. And ‘defining masculinity’? Puh-lease. Your ‘player’ habits are so just a cover story.
AND SIRIUS IS A DOUCHE TO MARLENE! I don’t know why she likes him! And don’t even try to defend Sirius! I like the guy, and I can still admit it—HE’S AN ASS.
-Lily Evans 

Is it pathetic that I couldn’t help but watch James out of the corner of my eye as he wrote me my note?

Don’t answer that.

It’s just…when did James suddenly sprout muscles…and somewhat attractiveness?

I glanced back at him again, and studied how his broad shoulders were bent over his desk, scribbling away furiously on a small, wrinkled piece of paper. His brows were all scrunched up and his long rectangular glasses were falling down his nose.

I’ve never seen anyone work glasses like that boy works glasses.


Ew. This is Potter we’re talking about. He is hideously aggravating and a pain in my ass. He has no regard for the rules and an absolute terrible understanding of personal space. He has a repulsive ass and has a somewhat crude sense of humor. And he is so wretchedly gorgeous.

James glanced up at me, folding the paper as he did so, smirking as he tossed me his note.

Wow. Did you think out that whole argument? Aw, Evans, you shouldn’t beat yourself up over thinking about me every night!

I snorted quietly. He really thinks I think about him at night?
No, my brain shot back at me, only in Transfiguration. Damn my sarcastic brain.

And besides, the note continued, who said I was a player? I’m pretty sure that title is reserved for Sirius only, Flower. And who said Marlene even liked Sirius? I think that’s just your over-analytical brain. 
James can spell analytical? I'm impressed. 

And Evans! You like Sirius? Aww, I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to know. But anyways, don’t even bother responding to this note. By the time you finish it, class’ll be over. 

Sure enough, the bell rings just as I read ‘over’.

Before anyone has even moved, I’m forcefully yanked out of my seat and I barely have time to grab my bag before I’m flung out the classroom and into the nearest broom closest by Potter.

Oh joy.

I blinked my eyes several times, trying to adjust to the dark.

“Geez, Potter, next time why don’t you just throw me into a bloody broom closet?” I huffed, dropping my bag to the floor and shoving away a broom that was literally up my ass.

“Yeah,” he grunted, “I’ll work on that.”

I glanced up at him, craning my neck to see him. I’ve never really thought about how I’m only 5’4 and James is well over 6 feet. It’s just another reason we wouldn’t be good together, I suppose. Not that I have been making a mental list or anything…that would be…er…weird…

James’ eyes were squinting down at me, both his arms on either side of my head, or, well, a few inches above my head, but whatever. His back was arched over me, and his long, messy mop of a head was inclined towards mine, only inches away.

“So…” I said.

James rolled his eyes at me, “we’re in here because you were freaking out, remember?”

“Oh!” I cried, “Right! So, do you think Marlene likes Sirius?”

He frowned, and was quiet for about thirty seconds before he answered, “I…I’m not sure…Maybe. I think she’s definitely physically attracted to him…But I’m not sure how emotionally attached she is. You’ll have to figure that one out on your own.”

I frowned in discontent, somewhat amazed that he had come up with so complex a solution so quickly. “Well…hypothetically, if she did like Sirius…do you think they could work? Do think Sirius would hurt here? Could he like her back?”

“Er…yes, I think he could like her back. They would have great chemistry…but would he hurt her? I’m not sure…Like I said; he’s a player at heart. I suppose I’ll have to talk to him about that…that is, if you want me to?”

The corner of my lip turned upwards, “Yes, James, would you please?”

“’Course I will, Evans. Anything for you.”

My face crumpled into defeat. Damnit! I hate when he says cute things like that! Things that are…well….nice. And very sweet.

“Aw, Lils,” James muttered, “It’ll be fine, I promise Sirius won’t hurt her, I won’t let him.” he murmured as he gently wrapped his arms around my torso, hugging me, comforting me. Obviously thinking my concern was for my friend. And not aggravation at his cute-side.

As I hugged him back, twisting my arms around his lean, toned waist; smelling his delicious scent of boy, I couldn’t help but feel defeated:

Because who am I kidding?

James Potter is so fucking sexy.

I’m screwed.
A/N this chapter is really short. but i thought it was just...done. y'know? lily has finally admitted that james is a sexy beast. about flippin' time.
and umm, what happened to reviews? i got a ton more one like, chapter three or something. PLEASE, if you like this story even a little bit..or even if you hate it...just PLEASE review! they legit make my day!

p.s. if anyone's good at banners..